The Way To Each Other
by aeval
Summary: Santana's life is far harder than it appears to the average viewer. Her dad's in jail and her mom turns tricks in their old family home. Worst yet, Santana herself has to do the same to keep her mom alive and food in her belly. Can Quinn save her? Or will Quinn's domineering father ruin everything? (Quintana)
1. Chapter 1

_**WARNING: DO NOT CONTINUE READING UNLESS YOU HAVE READ AND UNDERSTAND THE FOLLOWING AUTHORS' NOTE. **_

**AUTHORS' NOTE: The following fic contains graphic non-consensual sexual situations involving a minor with adults. It also contains depictions of drug use, prostitution - legal age and underage - in a non-glorified way, death, violence, parental abandonment, emotional and physical abuse, alternate sexualities (as opposed to the homosexual/heterosexual/bisexual), and sexually transmitted diseases. If you are not capable of handling fiction containing these themes, we thank you for your interest, but we respectfully ask you to please not read this story. If you are not mature enough to handle these themes, we again thank you for your interest, but respectfully ask you to please not read. If you choose to continue reading, you are acknowledging that you are aware of what you're getting into and as such, we will disregard any angry comments regarding the subjects we have just warned you for being included in this fic. This is not a light hearted fluff fic but a darker story regarding issues which do affect people in the United States of America and other "first world" countries even now. All we ask is that you please be heed this warning we have provided when reading this fic. Thank you. - Sincerely, Sio & Maura  
**

_**END OF WARNING: IF YOU HAVE UNDERSTOOD THE PROCEEDING AUTHORS' NOTE, YOU MAY PROCEED. IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO NOT READ THE NOTE, THEN WE CANNOT BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR HOW THIS FIC MAY AFFECT YOU.**_

**A/N the Second: Before anyone comments about it, yes, this was previously posted on LiveJournal as part of a Big Bang challenge last year. No, we don't intend to mass post this here as we are in the process of cleaning it up and editing it. It's a lengthy process as this fic is well over 230k words in length, which is why we're only posting one chapter every few days.  
**

* * *

**CHAPTER ONE**

The night started out like every night did for Santana Lopez.

She always showered at school after Cheerios finished and headed straight home. That day, she ducked into the convince store near school and pocketed a pack of gum and a snickers bar before getting out quickly. She ate the candy on the way to Lima Heights. Once she got to the tiny one bedroom apartment she and her mom shared, she quickly cleaned up the beer bottles and stamped out cigarettes that littered the tables. She had to go meet her mom soon at work, a ritual she had been doing since she could remember. But it was different now, when Santana turned thirteen she was told she needed to work to help support the family after her father was arrested.

Santana slipped into the bedroom and rolled her eyes at the condition of her mother's room. She thumbed through the closet of things she had shoplifted for them, picking out a pair of denim short shorts and a halter-top. She plopped down in front of the mirror and slathered on some of the make up that made her look at least five years older before grabbing her long jacket and slipping back out the door.

* * *

Santana nearly laughed as she watched the cars drive by. They all pretend at first. Pretend that they just drove down the wrong street; that they're not looking to score; that they're not looking for a woman who will do all the things that their wives and girlfriends won't.

"Hey there, beautiful," the older man called as he pulled up to the top of the street. "I'm looking for something tonight."

"Well, we're here to help you find that," one of the women said with a knowing smirk. "What are you looking for?"

"A less experienced woman. No offense," he said, his eyes crawling down the line of women that had now formed near the car. Santana was at the end, sucking on the tip of a cigarette looking vacant and disinterested. "What about that one, on the end?" He tilted his head towards her. "She looks new."

"She is new. Leila!" she called, causing Santana to look up and strut over to the car. "Have a good time," the older woman said with a quick kiss to the young girl's cheek. Santana silently got into the man's car and watched out the window as he drove around the corner. When the car moved to park a few blocks away at a motel Santana followed the man out and into a room. She had been here before, many, many times over the three years.

* * *

Santana grew up no different from anyone else. She had a mother who loved her and a father who worked all the time. But when her father was arrested on drug charges from stealing from the hospital he worked at Santana's life changed. Her mother - born and raised in a low-income area in Nicaragua - reverted to the profession she had acquired from her mother. When they moved to Lima Heights Adjacent Santana began going along when her _mami_ would meet up with _friends_. She'd sit in the living room of some strange house for an hour or two and color while her _mami_ went off and played with other people. Or at least that's what she thought as a five year old little girl.

She realized what was going on when she was close to eight. She was watching the babies of her _mami_'s friends when one of the men who had come to visit came out of the back room adjusting his pants and smiling at the young girl.

"So pretty." He smiled, his teeth yellow and his breath smelling like booze. "I'll see you soon." He stroked her cheek and blew her a kiss before walking out of the house. Santana was confused, but when her _mami_ came out and pulled her aside, hugging her tightly and telling her she was a beautiful girl and she would be a good girl and help her _mami_ someday, she just nodded.

* * *

Her mom sat there, her body wobbling with substance as she directed her young daughter onto her knees. Maria took her baby's long black hair into her hands and guided her towards the waiting man's crotch. "Just close your eyes, baby," she whispered.

Santana Lopez was twelve when she officially became Lelia, and when she was thirteen when she was directed to let a man take her virginity.

* * *

It was the last day of summer vacation and Santana was probably the only one in the district thankful for it to end. She no longer had to spend most of her day lying to Brittany and Quinn about where she had to go then spending hours on end _working_. She was the youngest of the girls - and several men - so they only brought her out when someone asked for her _type_. She sat in the back room finishing her summer homework for her AP English class. She was starting high school the next day, but she had been so busy and tired all summer that she was slightly behind. She was finishing her paper on _Of Mice and Men_ when the door opened. One of the younger men came into the room and squatted down next to her.

"Leila, you're up," he said, his voice a breathy baritone that matched his lithe stature. "This guy's a piece of work…"

"Have you… with him?" she asked as she closed her textbook and stood up. Carlos ran his fingers through her hair and pinched her cheeks. He brought his hands down to her less than developed chest and tried to push her breasts together.

"Yeah," he replied. "_Dios_, _chica_, we need to get you some tits… You look like a twelve year old boy."

"Well, last time I checked I was a thirteen year old girl…" She huffed and pulled herself away.

When Carlos heard her say her true age out loud, he smacked her clean across the face. "You little cunt, you want the cops to show up here? Get us all arrested? No? So keep that shit to yourself. If he asks, you're eighteen."

Santana whimpered slightly and followed behind Carlos as she headed to the next room. When she walked in there was already a man on the bed, already naked and waiting for her. She walked closer and looked him over. He was in good shape, better than most that asked for her, but he had curly hair and his chest hair looked coarse. Santana sighed. She hated men with hair on their bodies - it hurt her sensitive skin and it made it harder to pretend she was elsewhere when she was with them.

"Hi," she said softly, as she watched him grip his dick more when he saw how beautiful his _partner_ was. "You asked for someone like me?"

"How old are you?" he asked, sitting up and reaching for her. She allowed herself to be moved and she stood in front of him as he ran his hands down her sides and to her skirt. Before she even answered, his hands were under her skirt pulling down the silk panties she stole from a store a few weeks back. "You look no older than one of my students."

"I'm eighteen," she lied, her voice not wavering as she told the lie she told several times a day. Santana did not look eighteen, she didn't even look sixteen, but they believed her because they wanted too.

"Good." He smirked - a lopsided grin - as he pulled her onto his lap. His erection pushed up under her skirt and Santana's eyes closed against the pain of being entered while dry as he penetrated her. "I want you to call out Mr. Schue when you come."

* * *

Two years later and several more visits the teacher still hadn't realized that the girl he paid for sex was actually one of his under-aged students. He was normally drenched in booze when he showed up at the house looking for her. Sometimes he took the others, but Santana always knew when he'd come for her. It was normally after a day where Sue tortured him and he wanted to get back at her by fucking his cheerleader "look-alike" prostitute.

* * *

He was sitting in one of the room's two chairs stroking himself when she came in. She could feel the surge of bile at the sight of her teacher's hairy, naked body sprawled out on the chair in front of her with his dick in his fist, but she pushed it down and did her best to offer a sultry smile. "You requested me, Mr. Schue?"

"That's right, Lelia." He smirked at her, nodding at the room's other chair as he picked up a couple of blue pills, dry swallowing them. "I want you to put that on.

Santana breath caught in her throat as she saw the familiar red and white of a Cheerio uniform draped over the chair. No. It wasn't happening. She did _everything_ to keep _her_ life from overlapping with Lelia's. She didn't see him get up as she stared at the uniform, shaking her head. "No..."

His hand fisted tight enough in her hair to draw tears from her eyes as he yanked her back. "What do you mean _no_? I _bought_ you, Lelia. You do what _I_ say. Now put on that damn uniform." He shoved her towards the chair, forcing her to throw her hands out to catch herself before she hit the hard wood. "You have no idea how hard it was to get it from that harridan, so don't you dare argue with me."

Her hands shook as she carefully disrobed, hearing the slight creak of the chair as he settled back into it behind her, the slow rasp of his palm against his erection. She started to pull the uniform on over her underwear, only to be stopped.

"Don't bother with that. All you need is the skirt and top on. That's it."

She had to swallow back the surge of bile as she stripped naked - exposing her entire body for his lecherous gaze. She hated doing it. Hated when a client wanted her completely exposed, but she knew better than to resist. The heavy polyester was harsh against her sensitive skin as she slid on the shell and skirt without any barrier between and she had to fight back a whimper.

"That's better." He was behind her again, running a hand over her body, his erection pressing against her ass through the skirt. "I paid for you for six hours and this makes it so much easier for me." His fingers curled about her jaw, pulling her head up so he could bite at the corner of her neck, painfully hard. "You know the usual rule, Lelia - you call me Mr. Schue when you come - but I'm adding a new one now." His fingers tightened at her throat, his breath hot against her ear, "I'm going to call you Santana and you're going to answer everything I say with _yes, Mr. Schue_."

She whimpered and tried to shake her head. It wasn't possible. It just wasn't. "N-no... please. My name is Lelia..."

Suddenly his hand was jerking her around and his knuckles burned as they crashed into her cheek, smashing her head to the side. "Your name is whatever I say it is! I _bought_ you, slut! You do whatever the fuck I say! You are _whoever_ the fuck I say you are!"

He shoved her down on the bed, towering over her. "You think you're so damn _special_, Santana? Well, you're _not_. You're just another slut willing to fuck anyone. Here I am, Santana," the edge of his hands slapped into his thighs as he thrust his cock towards her, "why don't you show me your _skills_."

"P-please," she whispered, tears slipping down her cheeks out of control as she tried to slide back, knowing it wouldn't make anything better but not able to stop herself. She cried out as his hand fisted in her hair again, jerking her to her knees.

"Am I not _good_ enough for you?" His free hand was wrapped around his dick, pumping with a wet slapping sound making the head bob near her face as she clenched her eyes shut.

"N-no... please..." She shook her head despite his grip being so tight it was tearing strands of hair from her head.

His hand cracked across her face again, drawing a trickle of blood from the corner of her mouth. "What did I say about refusing me?!" He jerked her towards his cock, but she kept her mouth closed, not wanting to do it. "Open your fucking mouth and suck me!" His hand gripped her jaw, pinching her cheeks and forcing her mouth open, shoving his dick inside until she choked and fought for breath. "You're nothing but a slut, Santana! Don't think I haven't seen you sucking off Puck in the damn stairwell! You _like_ this."

She pushed at him, fighting for breath as he thrust into her mouth, gagging with each reckless strike against the back of her throat. Her nails dug into his hips, dragging welts down his legs but he just groaned and thrust harder. The rancid scent of his genitals clogged her nostrils until she could barely breathe. She could feel the little she ate starting to come up just as he finally pulled out of her mouth, only to pump himself a couple of times and spurt his semen on her face to mix with her tears. She coughed, swallowing hard to try not to throw up, a hand going to her throat.

"Don't think we're done, Santana," he growled, pumping himself hard again and shoving her back onto the bed to crawl on top of her. "You're forgetting the _rules_, Santana." He rubbed himself against her dry slit under her skirt, flipping up the pleats. "You're not _allowed_ to forget the _rules_."

He shoved inside her with an angry growl, making her cry out as she felt something tear at the force. It wasn't the first time someone had torn her, but it always made her _mami_ mad because she couldn't work for a couple weeks until she healed again. She prayed it would be enough to make her refuse to let Will Schuester ever hire her again as she clenched her eyes shut and bit her lip nearly through trying not to scream as he fucked her.

"You're _always_ sabotaging me, Santana! Working for Sue! Don't think I don't know!" Each sentence punctuated with a forceful thrust that pounded the bed back against the wall and shifted her entire body. His fingers gripped at her hips hard enough to leave bruises, dragging her back each time. "You think you can destroy _everything_, but not this time, Santana! Not! This! _Time_!"

She just laid there and let him do what he wanted, trying desperately to go somewhere else and ignore the way he shoved up the shell of the uniform he'd made her wear to bite at her small breast buds. It hurt, but no more than usual. If she could just block out his _words_ it would be okay. If she could just ignore her teacher raping her - and the fact that he paid for the privilege to do so - it would be okay.

It was all she had left to hope for as her lives crashed together.


	2. Chapter 2

Quinn sighed as the warm blast of air hit her as the automatic glass doors whooshed open in front of her. She hated having to make these stupid Walgreen's runs for her mother, but without her prescriptions, she'd be even more unpleasant. So she unzipped her coat as she trudged into the overly warm store and headed back to the pharmacy counter.

Everything was beyond stressful lately. Her mother's "headaches" being only part of her worries. Brittany was being unmanageably dense - going off and doing her own thing instead of the assigned choreography more and more often - and with Santana absent the last couple of days, it fell on her shoulders to try and keep the ditzy blonde in line. And that was another problem. With Santana out, there was no whip to back up her commands and the entire _squad_ was acting like babies leaving Sue to go on a hormonal rampage and start plotting yet _another_ bizarre scheme against Mr. Schuester. She sighed thinking about all of it and how she'd deal with it as she turned the corner.

Only to see a familiar slight form hunched over by the painkillers and bandages. Frowning, she walked closer. "Oh my gosh. Santana? Is that you? Where have you _been_?"

Santana nearly dropped the bandages she was trying to shove in her sweatshirt when she looked up. Her face was swollen and still bloody from the other day. "Q?" She mumbled, her words not properly forming from the swelling in her jaw.

"Oh my _gosh_!" She hurried over to her second in command, raising a gentle hand to brush her cheek. "What _happened_? Sue is going to _freak_ when she sees this, San..."

"I don't really care," she said quickly before picking up her stuff and shoving it into her bag. "I gotta go, see you around," she said quickly before bolting out of the store. Santana stopped and leaned against the back of the building when she was sure no one followed her out for stealing. She sighed, before doubling over and coughing up a red spurt of blood. "Fuck," She mumbled before trying to catch her breath.

Inside, Quinn scooped up the bottle of peroxide Santana had dropped and hurried to get her mother's medications - she did _not_ want to be making _two_ trips - paying for both before running out. She looked around trying to guess which direction Santana might have gone before jogging around the building on a hunch. Coming around the last corner, she spotted her leaning up against the wall and tossed the bottle of peroxide at her feet.

"You dropped that. You want to tell me what the fuck is going on with you now?"

"Nothing, everything is fine. I just fell alright?" she said as she struggled to stand to her full height even though it hurt her broken rib after picking up the bottle. She shoved it in her bag with the other items she had stolen. "Just... Just don't say you saw me."

Quinn raised a brow. "Excuse me? You're about as fine as Carla Pearson was when she fell off the pyramid in our freshman year. If you don't want me to tell people I saw you, you'd better come up with a heck of a better excuse than you _fell_."

"How about it's none of your fucking business?" Santana barked, not even realizing one of her eyes was swollen shut still and there was probably still traces of cum in her hair.

She had run as fast as she could from the hotel room when Mr. Schuester was done with her. Her mom would kill her if she found out she had been torn _again_ - she had only just healed from the last time and Santana couldn't face getting hit anymore. So she ran. She ran and slept in the park that first night and woke up covered in blood so she ended up getting where she was now. Face to face with her best friend and rival.

Quinn snorted. "Like hell it's not. Maybe you forget, Santana, but I _thought_ I was your friend. Right now, you look like a good source of the line of crap you're trying to feed me. And if the friends part doesn't mean a whole lot to you any more, I _am_ still Captain of the Cheerios and knowing why one of our best flyers is beaten half to death is pretty much definitely my _business_."

"How about this? I'm quitting the Cheerios. There. My shits not your problem anymore," she said, trying to keep tough about her statement but losing energy to fight. "I gotta bounce," she said as she started to limp away, not even in the direction of her house.

"Fuck that." Quinn reached out and grabbed Santana's arm. "What the hell is going on and why do you think I'm capable of letting my _best friend_ walk off when she's obviously hurt?!"

Santana nearly passed out when Quinn grabbed her. Her mind flashing back to the previous day and she stopped breathing. The pain that was caused at the slight jar of her body made her whimper as she tumbled to the ground. Santana looked up fearfully at Quinn as she tried to find her footing again. "Because... it's easier to just ignore me, ignore this. I'm not gonna talk about it. I just need to go get cleaned up, okay?. Just... let me deal with this. Okay? I'm fine... Q, I'm fine."

"You're not fine, you're _hurt_." Quinn frowned, discontented. "At least come home with me and use my shower or something."

When finally standing, Santana sighed. She knew she needed to get cleaned up, she needed to get bandaged and she didn't have anywhere else to go. Shelters ask too many damn questions, Sue would kill her if she broke into the locker rooms again and Quinn was _offering_. "Fine," Santana agreed, holding her bag against her tightly.

Quinn almost sighed with relief. "Come on, you. My car's out front and my mom's having one of her _headaches_ so she won't be talking to us."

"That's fine," Santana stated as she followed quietly. She carefully slid into the car, the leggings that adorned her legs covering a myriad of bruises chafed against her tender thighs. She whimpered softly as she sat down in the seat. She pulled the hood of her sweatshirt over her head and looked down at her knees. "Stop looking at me," Santana said quietly when she noticed Quinn staring at her.

Quinn sighed and shook her head. "Buckle up. I don't feel like getting a ticket today." She started the car and backed out of her spot. "You can stay if you want," she glanced at Santana out of the corner of her eye as she focused on driving, "tonight that is."

The battered girl carefully clicked the seat-belt in and leaned back. She closed her non-swollen eye and tried to breathe. "I just need to shower," Santana whispered, she could still smell him and _feel_ him all over her body. "I just need to get it off." She kept her eyes shut, the car making her feel more sick during the ride.

As much as she didn't want to sleep in the park again she knew she shouldn't stay with Quinn. She didn't want the girl to find out _why_ she was hurt,_ how_ she got hurt. She had been protecting her secret for this long, it had to continue.

"Needing a shower is the least of your problems," Quinn muttered, pulling into her driveway and shutting the car off. "We're here. Come on."

Carefully, Santana climbed out of the car. She held onto her bag containing her only possessions and all the food she had until she could go home. She followed Quinn into the large house. It was always warm, it always was clean, and - unlike Santana's place - it didn't hold bad memories for the young girl. Santana kept her head down and followed the blonde as she headed up the stairs. Once inside the other girl's bedroom she lifted her head back up.

Quinn watched her carefully. Santana wasn't acting like herself and that had her on edge. "You know where the bathroom is. Want me to get you some towels? Maybe the first aid kit?" She raised a curious brow.

Santana carefully put down her bag and looked through it. "Uh... Can.. I borrow something to wear?" she asked quietly. "I didn't realize... I don't have anything else."

"Yeah, of course." She nodded at her closet, taking a seat at her desk. "You know where everything is, San. It's not like this is your first time here."

"Yeah. Cool," she replied as she grabbed some of the first aid supplies and headed into the bathroom.

She carefully stripped off her clothing and looked in the mirror. She had bruises all over her skin, her hips had hand prints and her thighs had taken on a hue of black and blue. She looked at her face, swollen and contorted with gashes. She saw the sticky semen in her thick hair and doubled over as she emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. Blood and bile. She sniffled softly as she crawled into the bathtub and turned on the hot water, letting it cascade over her beaten body and wash away all the dried blood and traces of _him_.

* * *

Outside, Quinn sat, frowning irritatedly at the bag Santana had left sitting on her bed. Something wasn't adding up. Her best friend looked like she'd been had the hell kicked out of her, but she kept insisting she was fine. Lord only knew what she was hiding under her clothes.

She rubbed at her forehead, then got up to go get some fresh towels and a sandwich for her best friend. She would be damned if she didn't get what happened out of her one way or another. And if her _mom_ was behind this, well she'd... Quinn shook her head. She didn't actually know _what_ she'd do if that was the case, but she hated the very idea.

Coming back, she tucked the towels under the arm with the plate and knocked on the bathroom door. "San? Hey, I've got some towels and some food for you. Can I come in?"

"Yeah," she called, not thinking about the vomit in the toilet or the blood stained clothing on the floor. She continued to try and carefully scrub away the night before as she sat on the floor of the shower.

Quinn eased the door open, almost biting her tongue at the state of the bathroom and her friend in the floor of the glass walled enclosures. She set the plate down on the counter and was closing the toilet lid to set the towel on it when she noticed the bloody mess in the toilet. "Jesus, San! You should go to a doctor or the hospital or something, not be skulking around in fucking _Walgreen's_!"

Santana shut the water off and reached a bruised arm out for the towel. "I'm still breathing, talking and walking," she said. "I'm fine." She wiggled her fingers until Quinn put the towel in her hand. She quickly wrapped it around her body, happy when it rested nearly to her knees when secured. She carefully got out of the shower and picked up the clothing on the floor and put them in the trash. "I stole them anyway." She shrugged and looked down. "Clothing... I needs some."

Quinn's eyes narrowed. "I'll give you a t-shirt. If you want more, you can stay until morning. There is no _way_ I'm letting you out of this room tonight. I don't know where the hell you've been, but right now you look worse than you did after Sue decided that running a gauntlet would be a wonderful training exercise."

"What the fuck, Q," Santana huffed. "You don't want me to have pants on? I mean shit..." Santana thought about her choices for a moment. Choice A: leave, put on the pants that were caked in blood and _his_ body fluids or choice B: stay here and be warm and not have to stay in the park again. "Fine," she huffed, "I want pants though."

"You can have shorts. I don't want you taking off in the middle of the night. It's fucking cold out there, San." Quinn snorted irritatedly. "I don't want you getting sick on top of having the shit kicked out of you or whatever the hell happened." She turned to go get her friend some clothes. "And eat the damn sandwich. I don't give a damn what Sue has to say about it, you need it."

Santana snuck a quick look at her thighs, there was no way shorts would cover the bruises. "Quinn. Please...pants," she squeaked as she wrapped the towel back around herself. She carefully sat on the toilet seat and picked at the food, she couldn't open her mouth very wide, her jaw still aching from the previous day and the swelling making it even more difficult. She sucked on the bread until she could swallow it.

Quinn came back more annoyed at her search not turning up any clean shorts since most were packed away with the summer clothes. She tossed the pair of Cheerio sweatpants and a plain t-shirt at her before slapping a package of panties on the counter. "I noticed you didn't have any in your clothes for whatever reason. They're new so you can keep them or whatever. Just," for a moment she actually looked worried, "just don't leave tonight, okay?"

"Thanks," she whispered looking at the clothing. "Let me get dressed okay?" she asked, as she stood up. "I won't leave."

She watched Quinn nod and leave before closing the door and removing the towel. She unwrapped the panties and rooted around in the cupboard to find a sanitary pad to put on them. She carefully cleaned the torn skin between her legs with peroxide and threw the tissues into the trash before pulling the white cotton up her thighs and followed it by the red sweatpants. She stood in the mirror and cleaned the cuts on her face, and bandaging the ones that needed stitches. Her breath wavered as she pulled the white shirt over her torso trying to ignore the stab of pain in her ribs. After trying to control her breathing for a minute she came out into the room. She stood awkwardly and held the plate with most of a sandwich on it in her hand.

In the time it took her to minister her cuts and get dressed, Quinn had delivered her mother's medication and changed into her own pajamas. She was sitting on the bed reading when Santana came out. Looking up from her book, she noticed the sandwich. "Does eating hurt your mouth too much?" She frowned, gesturing at the split lip. "We probably have things for a protein shake down in the kitchen. Would that be better?"

"Q...I'm," she stumbled over her words as she put the plate down onto the desk, "I'm not hungry." Santana moved closer to the other girl now that she didn't smell like blood and rancid sex. "I'm just not."

Quinn sighed and put her book aside. "Okay, but I would feel better if you'd at least have breakfast with me in the morning, okay? Since I doubt you'll allow me to take you to see a doctor now."

"I can't," she said honestly. "Nothing is more than surface. I'm fine, I'll be back to normal in a few days," she assured her as she stood near the bed. She couldn't sit comfortably with her ribs hurting like they were. "Don't worry too much, you'll wrinkle."

Quinn shook her head with a little laugh and scooted over, patting the bed. "Come lay down. And don't give me that face. We used to sleep together as kids and it's not any bigger deal now, San."

Santana carefully laid herself down on the bed. "Keep those pale ass hands to yourself, Fabray," she tried to joke. "I don'ts wanna wake up with you allowing that mildly lesbo side of yourself a cheap grope."

She rolled her eyes. "Please. You're about as attractive as Manhands right now. And you're the one who should be feeling privileged to be allowed in _my_ bed." She winked with a lightly teasing smirk. "It's unconquered territory after all, maybe I should be warning _you_ to keep your hands to yourself."

"Whateves, blondie." She rolled her eyes and smirked the best she could. "You're just jealous that I get Puck whenever I want and _everyone_ wants me."

"Seriously? _That's_ your comeback? _Puck_?" Quinn laughed, rolling on her side so she could see her friend better. "Please. You know as well as I that if I wanted him, I could have him and don't you think you're a _little_ conceited?" She raised a brow with a teasing smirk. "You're not _that_ hot."

"Yes I am," Santana said quickly. "You know damn well that I am too. I'm a 10, if not more." She knew she was attractive, she had been told that from a young age and it never really bothered her. "It's what I got and I flaunt it. Ain't nothing wrong with that."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "If it's all the same, I prefer your company for your friendship, not your body." She stuck her tongue out with a wink. "Though I can't deny you make me look good."

"That's what I'm here for." She sighed and winced as she tried to push her hair out of her face. "It's a good thing I have A's in all my classes... cause I'm not coming to school for a while," she admitted as she looked at the ceiling.

"Your grades will drop," Quinn whispered softly, pillowing her head on her arm. "It'll be harder to get into a good college and get out of here... are you sure?"

"It's WMHS… are my grades gonna drop that much in a week or two?" she asked softly. "Because I can't go… I can't go looking like this. My... my face is a mess and people will ask questions and look at me and I'll get fucking arrested or something... I can't go." She started to breathe quickly at the thought of people finding out, of Mr. Schuester realizing he actually raped and beat a student rather than a hooker. She started to hyperventilate as she thought about what might happen to her.

"Hey," Quinn's eyes were wide as she reached for her friend, "hey, calm down, it's okay. You don't have to go if you don't want to, but your mom's going to _freak_ when she sees you, San..."

Santana jumped back as she felt a hand touch her. She couldn't see Quinn out of that eye and she didn't know what was happening. She looked down as she rolled onto her side so she could see Quinn. "Sorry," she said as she tried to calm her breath. When she realized that Quinn mentioned her mother she laughed softly. "My mom won't give a shit," she spat out. "Like she'll ever realize I got hurt or am even gone..."

"I," she hesitated, uncertain in this situation, pulling her hand back to curl it against her chest, "I'm sorry, San. I...you can stay here? For at least the rest of the weekend. I don't know how I'd explain it to Daddy after that..."

The battered girl sighed. "Q," she looked at her and smiled sadly, "I can't. Your dad hates me as is... I'll stay tonight but I'm leaving in the morning... You know as well as I do, you'll get in trouble if I'm here. If I'm here looking like this, it'll be even worse for you."

"San, he's away at a conference this weekend. He won't be home until Monday night and you know my mom is too medicated to care. Please?" She looked worried for her friend. "Just for the weekend."

"You won't ask any questions?" Santana asked, looking up through her eye lashes. "Because I can't talk about it and I don't want to... I just want to sleep in a warm bed and I know I'm safe here." She looked down and sighed. "I know you're not okay with seeing me like this, and I'm not okay... but I need you to think I am, okay?"

Quinn nodded, though she wasn't able to hide the worry in her eyes. "Okay," she reached out again, making sure Santana saw her this time, "I won't ask. Just stay this weekend. I'd like to know my best friend is safe for a couple of days at least." She shook her head. "I wish I knew who hurt you because I want to hurt them so much right now, but I won't ask. I promise."

"Okay," Santana whispered softly before looking at the ceiling as she breathed in and out. After a few minutes of silence as she turned her head to look at her friend who was still looking at her with worried eyes. "Quinn?" she asked softly. "Can... Can we watch the Buffy DVDs I know you hide in your closet?"

Quinn's lips quirked in a little smile. "Sure, we can do that." She sat up swinging her legs off the bed. "I got the Angel box sets too since you were here last. If you'd like, we can make a marathon weekend of it?"

Santana giggled softly and forced herself to sit up and bit with a nod. "Sounds perfect," she stated and pulled the blanket over her legs as she watched her friend moved around the room and pop the DVD into the player. Quinn crawled back onto the bed and lay on her stomach facing the television as the credits stated. Santana smiled and sunk into the comforting feeling of warmth from the bed and comfort of being safe for the first night in a long while.

* * *

Santana walked out of Figgins's office. He'd wanted to expel her for two straight weeks of skipping. He said he tried calling her house - her phone had been disconnected weeks before. He tried talking to Brittany, who was no help. He even went to Sue, who was even more pissed about one of her best Cheerios disappearing. Santana sat in front of the man, her legs covered by black skinny jeans and she was wearing a long sleeved shirt. She couldn't wear her uniform since the bruises on her thighs hadn't disappeared yet and she was scared to go into Glee wearing it after what happened two weeks prior.

"Ms. Lopez," Figgins stated, "you are a minor. You need to be at school." Santana rolled her eyes as he continued to tell her that her GPA dropped to a B. "You cannot be on honor roll if you continue to be delinquent!"

"What if I said that all the work would be finished before the end of the week and I said that you'd put me back on honor roll?" She smirked, the makeup caked on her face cracked with her smile. "Because I can say that I heard a little birdie that told me that you might have a dirty little secret that you might not want the school board knowing..."

"Ms. Lopez..."

"Something about sucking the toes of Asian?" she started but was cut off before she could finish her statement. "So... Do we have a deal? Back to my A's and the absences don't go on my record?" Figgins glared then nodded quickly and Santana smiled. "Good. It's been lovely." She got up and walked out of the room and over to her locker. She flicked the combo and checked her make up in the mirror before looking for her books.

Quinn stepped up to Santana, spinning to lean back against the lockers with her books cradled against her chest. "Good to see you back amongst the peons, S. You might be interested in knowing that Sue's on a rampage looking for you."

"Just great," she stated as she pulled her physics book out of her locker. "I really am not in the mood to deal with her shit." She slammed her locker and started walking with Quinn to class. She walked by Mr. Schue's room and froze when she heard his voice. The thought of his body, his hands hurting her and the smell of him filled her memory. She quickly felt bile rise into her throat and she moved to run into the bathroom and emptied her stomach in the closest toilet.

Quinn followed, glaring at the other students staring at the stall in shock. "Have you never seen someone being sick before? Out!"

The three girls couldn't get out of the room fast enough. Once they were gone, Quinn moved to push the stall open, coming in to kneel beside Santana, placing a light hand on her back when she was sure the other girl knew she was there. "What the hell was that, San? Are you sick?"

Santana gasped for breath as she continued to throw up her nonexistent stomach contents. The smell of him still burned her nose. If she only saw him in her work context she would have been fine, but now he'd invaded her life here. She got fucked as herself not her alter ego and he _wanted_ that even though he had no idea it was her. Santana wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and stood up and pulled away and moved to the sink.

"Just got dizzy," she said as she held onto the counter and breathed through it.

"Bull," Quinn muttered, standing up and hitting the flush before coming out. She grabbed a handful of paper towels and wet them at the sink before handing them over. "You know, if you want people to believe you when you lie, I'd suggest agreeing with whatever plausible excuse they offer you."

"Hopefully I won't puke anymore today and no one will ask," Santana snapped as she took the cloth and wiped her mouth. After a few more moments she gathered herself up and noticed that some of her make-up wiped off. "Shit," she mumbled as she pulled her compact out of her pocket and looked in the mirror and started covering the bruise that marred her eye.

"Can we just bounce and go to class?" She sighed as she picked her book back up and ran her fingers through her braid and looked at Quinn. "I'm not in the mood to deal with anyone else looking at me today."

Quinn scowled. "Whatever, Santana. I suppose I can try all I want to be your friend and help you but I guess I can't if you don't want the help." She blinked more quickly than usual, turning toward the door. "Let me know when you actually _want_ a friend again."

"I don't need any fucking help!" Santana hollered at the blonde. "I don't need your pity, your charity or your pathetic friendship. God, fuck! Just go the fuck away!" She couldn't do it. She couldn't stand Quinn being nice to her and keeping lying. She rather lose her friend than deal with what would happen if Quinn figured it out. "Just go away." She tried to keep her voice from cracking as she pushed the one person who could help her away.

"Why are you so insistent on pushing me away?!" Quinn snapped, spinning back on her heel. "What happened to my _friend_, Santana? What happened to having sleepovers and...and hanging out and _liking_ each other? You were one of my only _real_ friends, Santana." Her eyes were bright as she glared at the other girl. "I would do _anything_ for you, but you just toss me aside with all the other garbage, don't you."

"Because, Quinn," Santana hissed, "I'm fucking poison. You know why your fucking dad tells you to stay away? Why everyone in this town thinks I'm a fucking loser just like my parents? Because I fucking am! I'm a fucking whore and you need to just go away before I contaminate you!" Santana screamed.

She had lost it.

She had kept too much rage inside for too long, and it was spewing out. "I don't deserve a friend. I come to your fucking house after stealing from a store to take care of fucking injuries after getting the fuck beat out of me. You should have just let me go back to sleeping in the park! I should just die out there! Just go, fucking go and forget you ever fucking knew me!"

With that Santana grabbed her bag and ran out of the washroom. She couldn't deal with this. She couldn't go back to school and feel like she wasn't safe. She used to be safe but now... now everything was gone. She had no one and nowhere to go.

"But you were my only real friend," Quinn whispered as Santana bolted from the room, a single tear trickling down her determinedly stoic face. "The only one who didn't care how much Daddy yells and ignored Mom's _headaches_..."

She shook her head and turned to the sink, hearing the bell ring but ignoring it. There was no use in getting emotional. Santana didn't want her around. The last person who would actually visit her at home. Maybe her father was right. Maybe she didn't deserve friends after all.

Once she was satisfied that her confident mask was back into place, she strolled out of the bathroom, doing her best to look like the Captain of the Cheerios and not a lonely little girl who just lost her best friend.

* * *

Santana ran all the way back to Lima Heights. She opened the door to her house - which looked worse than when she left two weeks ago - and slipped inside. She dropped her backpack on the floor and grabbed the open vodka bottle off the table. She took a large gulp and set it back down before leaving to walk the seven blocks down the street to where she knew her mom would be. Maria looked up, a simple clear glass pipe between her fingers as she flicked her lighter. Her eyes closed and she inhaled the toxic smoke.

"_Mami?_" she whispered as she knelt next to the woman. "Are you okay? I missed you."

"Santi?" Maria slurred in a haze of crack. "You left?" she asked, slightly confused. "I looked all over..." She was lying, Santana knew she was lying but she just nodded.

"Sorry, _Mami_, I'm here now. I'll take care of you," she whispered and pushed her mother's formerly shiny hair back behind her ears.

"I need money, baby," her mom pleaded. "Go find some for us?"

Santana nodded and sighed. Kissing her mom's temple, she stood up and headed into the house. She spoke quickly in Spanish to one of the other women and she was quickly directed to the back room. Santana pulled her shirt off as she went and stood in the door frame. A man in his sixties sat on the bed with a grin on his face as the young girl moved closer to him and dropped to her knees.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Quinn moved through the halls like a force of nature. Things weren't adding up and even fewer were going like she'd planned. Finn pulling her aside to ask why they hadn't been on a date in the last couple of weeks was not how she'd wanted to start her morning. Especially not when she was still trying to get Santana to open up to her.

"Becky," she nodded at the smaller girl as she spotted her ahead in the hall, "walk with me, would you?"

"Sure, Q. What's up?" Becky's cheerful smile was usually enough to knock most people out of a funk, but Quinn was too distracted by worrying about her friend.

"You know Santana, right? I need some info on her."

"But why? I thought you were friends." The cheerful smile fell away, replaced by a confused frown.

Quinn huffed out a breath. "We are, but you know she doesn't talk about her family and stuff. I want to know what Sue knows."

Becky frowned. "Coach doesn't like me giving out information for free, Q..."

"I know, and I'll owe you, but something is wrong and I'm worried about her." Quinn sighed, letting the smallest Cheerio see the worry for a moment, "I need to know what's going on before I can do anything."

Becky thought about it for a moment then nodded decisively. "Okay. I'll look. But you might not like it."

"That's okay, Becky." Quinn smiled gratefully, "I just want to know."

* * *

"Becky, _what_ are you doing?" Sue's acerbic voice startled the girl into nearly throwing the folders she was thumbing through across the office.

"C-coach!" she stammered, "I... I was just..."

"Looking for information about Tits McGee to give Captain Nosy," she growled. "I know. You won't find what you want in there."

"I won't?" she asked, looking up at Sue curiously.

"No. Sensitive information is kept in the _black_ cabinet in the secret room. Come along," she muttered, pulling down the hatch to head up to her private room. Unlocking the cabinet in question, she pulled out a folder and tapped it against her hand for a second frowning at Becky before handing it to her. "This is not to leave this room. Not yet. Take photos or make copies," she nodded at the small copier in the corner, "but this folder doesn't leave here until it's time. Understand?"

Becky nodded, smiling at Sue. "Yes, Coach!"

"Alright then. I'll leave you to it."

* * *

She needed three hundred dollars. She needed it like yesterday. It had started snowing in Ohio and it was too cold for her to sleep in the park anymore or under the bleachers by the football field. For the first few nights, she'd figured out a way to sleep at the school by hiding in the lighting booth in the auditorium, but she'd been found by Sue early one morning when she was trying to shower and wash her clothing in the locker room. Santana had ran away quickly, leaving her sweatshirt and blanket behind. When she'd come back for them, she couldn't find any trace of them.

She left her mom at the house or wherever she ended up nights and went to clean her up and make sure she was still alive every night before heading to the motel she'd found a place at. Santana had gotten the room by seducing the attendant, but it had been over a week and she needed to pay up. With _actual_ money.

So she headed over to the park. Within three hours, Santana had made a hundred fifty bucks between hand jobs and dropping to her knees. But, when she met a guy who was willing to give her three hundred up front to fuck her ass, she barely hesitated before she gave in.

The frozen bark of the tree bit into her arms as she bent over. Calloused hands ran over her bare ass and spread her wide as he struggled to press his condom covered member into the girl's ass. Her nails grasped at the tree as she fought to cover the painful gasp that came out when he managed to push inside her. She let him push and pull her hips for what felt like an hour until her body ached from the constant thrusts, his large hands pawing at her small breasts through her shirt.

* * *

Quinn had been running in the park, her anxiety at trying to figure out how to take the information about Santana's dad to Santana, giving her way too much energy to just sit at home. The rhythm of her feet pounding the frozen ground was almost enough to blank the thoughts from her mind and let her Zen out. Then she turned the corner only to stumble to a stop and stare wide eyed at the sight of the hairy bare ass of a man with his pants around his knees pounding into the tanned ass of what she could only assume was his girlfriend.

Blushing dark red, she took a step back, a fallen branch cracking under her heel and making her freeze. The man chuckled and seemed to pick up his pace. She could just hear him whispering.

"Oh yeah, baby. Got us an audience now." His words came in grunts as his balls smacked rapidly into the girl. "Bet you like _that_." With that he gave a final hard thrust and tensed for a moment before relaxing, "Fuck yeah. That's the shit right there. Bet you ain't never been fucked like me before, babe."

"Yeah. Totally. Best ever," she whispered distractedly, trying to get out of this situation quickly. She held her breath against the pain as he pulled out of her and pulled off the condom. He tossed it on the ground and pulled up his pants and slapped his hand hard against her already pained ass, leaving a harsh red mark on her skin.

"I would have given you four hundred to cum in that tight ass bare," he remarked as he watched her pull up her leggings. He slipped the wad of cash into her hand and moved over and kissed her cheek. "See you again, little one." He smirked and walked away leaving the girl trembling against the tree. Santana looked down and saw the condom and the seeping cum and her stomach let go of the lackluster contents which at this point in the day contained nothing but free coffee from the AA meeting she slipped into early in the morning and the cum that slid down her throat before she could spit it out.

Shocked at the callous behavior, Quinn slowly came forward, glaring at the man. "Wow," she muttered, "what an asshole. Are you okay, miss... San?"

The younger girl's head snapped up and she looked panicked for a moment. "What? Why are you here? What... What are you doing?" She was shaking and cold from being exposed for a prolonged period of time in the freezing weather.

"You're in the park, San. I was out running. Jesus," she muttered, pulling off her jacket and putting it around San's shoulders. "You gotta be freezing. Where's your coat and even if you are being way more adventurous than me with your flings, you could at least do it somewhere warm."

"Uh," Santana stumbled, her teeth chattering. "Home," she said quickly, not realizing she had already been outside for several hours since early morning. She now had enough money to stay the week and a hundred extra dollars for food. She looked up at her friend with red eyes and blue lips. "Can you take me home?"

"Only if I can take you to _my_ home and get you clean and warmed up first." She put an arm around Santana's shoulders, trying to warm her up a bit as she started leading her back towards her home. "I'll give you a ride wherever you want after. And don't worry, Daddy's not going to be home for hours."

"I'm- I'm staying at a motel," she whispered leaning against Quinn as they walked because she was in so much pain. "My stuff is all there..."

"That's fine," Quinn murmured, more interested on getting Santana inside her house and warmed up than where she was staying. "I'll take you there later. I want you warm first."

Santana didn't fight, she just curled into her friend and hoped for the best. After the silent ten minute walk back to Quinn's house, Santana nearly collapsed as she was helped up to Quinn's room. She was shivering so hard that she couldn't formulate words anymore. "C-cold."

"I know," Quinn soothed, helping her into the bathroom and shutting the door to keep the hot air in. "Let's get you a shower okay?" She turned the water on to start heating and started helping Santana pull off her clothing, pressing her lips tightly to together at the sight of the bruising scattered about her almost painfully thin body.

Santana held onto Quinn as she pulled her clothing off, not even noticing when the wad of cash fell to the floor. She was shivering and clutching onto the blonde's arm, not caring about the state of her body. She had a red hand print on her ass, finger marks on her hips from men holding her so tight, bruising on her neck where one of the men decided he wanted to choke her... She didn't even think to worry about it, it was normal for her.

"Jesus, San," Quinn whispered, hating how damaged her friend looked. Making a quick decision, she stripped out of her own clothing, leaving them in a pile as she helped pull her best friend into the shower. "Come on, we need to get you warm."

The smaller girl clutched to Quinn, her head resting on the blonde's shoulder as they stood under the spray. It burned her skin, she just whimpered and curled closer into Quinn as she slowly felt her body gain feeling again.

Quinn soothed her hands over Santana's back, trying to chafe life and warmth back into cold skin. "Shh, it'll be okay," she whispered, holding her close despite the way she wanted to flinch and shiver away from the cold clamminess of Santana's skin pressing against hers.

Santana was silently crying, not even realizing it, given the water cascading over her, what felt like, lifeless body. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around the other girl's body as she slowly regained sensation and movement. First in her fingers - they flexed against soft skin - then her shoulders before her neck loosened up. She lifted her head up so she could look at her friend with tired eyes. "Hey," she croaked, her throat raw.

"Hi," Quinn whispered back with a careful smile, hugging her. "Haven't done something like this in a long time, have we?"

Santana whispered, "Yeah." She nuzzled Quinn's neck softly. They had stopped going in together when Santana started following her mother's wishes. She was told she could never let anyone know what was going on and Santana's body bruised easily. Her friend would ask and Santana couldn't come up with enough lies so she stopped wanting to risk it.

Quinn just stood there under the nearly too hot spray holding her friend for a moment. "I'm going to wash your hair, okay?" she asked, reaching for the bottle of shampoo on the ledge. "You can just stay like you are. I'll take care of you."

Santana just nodded, her eyes closing as she felt long fingers run against her scalp. Before everything, before her dad got arrested, before her mom became a shell of a person, before everything bad happened, Santana's mom used to wash her hair and sing to her every night. Her daddy would tuck her in and kiss her head... but that was all gone now. Santana started to break down in tears against her friend's chest again as she thought about the past and how fucked everything had become.

"Shh," Quinn murmured, lightly kissing her best friend's head, "it's okay, San. You're okay. You're safe here, no need to cry." She carefully scrubbed Santana's hair and rinsed it before working conditioner through it. "Don't worry, okay? Things will work out. You'll see."

"It's never going to be okay," she whispered. "It hasn't been okay in a long time." She sniffled as she tightened her grip on her friend. "I want everything to be okay again." She whimpered. "I want everything to stop hurting." She didn't even realize what she was saying anymore. She just whimpered and clutched onto the one good person in her world.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, holding Santana tight. "I wish I could fix things for you. I'm sorry I can't. I wish you'd let me help you. I can help if you just let me, I know I can. You're my best friend, San. I'd do anything for you..."

"It's nothing anyone can change." Santana sighed, pulling away after a few minutes. "We all have our problems," she whispered as she picked up Quinn's body wash and she began scrubbing her body, her memories of their causes making her put extra effort into scrubbing the bruises harder.

"Yeah, we do," Quinn looked hurt by San pulling away, "but I thought friends were supposed to help each other with their problems." She leaned back against the wall of the shower, giving Santana room to scrub her body and crossing her arms over her chest. "I know I can't fix anything or change it. I just want to help, why is that so hard to believe?" A flash of pain crossed her features, "Do you really think I'm that much of a bitch like everyone else in school?"

Santana's head snapped up. "That's not it," she said, her voice straining. "I.. It's not that. I promise. I just... It's too much. I don't wanna bring anyone else into it. I don't want you thinking less of me or hating me or turning your back on me... I don't care about everyone else, I just... I don't know how you _could_ help, it's too deep."

"So you won't even let me try? What the hell did you do, San, kill someone? Are you stealing babies? Smuggling drugs?" She scoffed, shrugging her shoulders, too hurt to meet Santana's gaze. "Whatever it is, you're my best friend. I'm not so shallow that I'd ditch you just because your life sucks."

The other girl just stayed silent for a few minutes before carefully getting out of the shower and wrapping herself in a towel. She sat on the toilet lid and looked at Quinn. "I didn't kill anyone." She sighed. "I just don't know _how_ to tell you, Q," she whispered. "I can't tell you or they'll -" She cut herself off and sighed wiping her eyes furiously.

"They'll what?" Quinn's head snapped up and she looked at Santana with narrowed eyes as she flicked the water off and grabbed her own towel. "If anyone is threatening you, San, you need to tell me."

"I just... I have to protect and take care of my mom, okay?" Santana sniffled as she pulled the pile of clothing over to her and picked up her shirt and leggings. Her money fell out of her clothes and back to the ground, but she quickly snatched it up as her gaze dropped to the ground. "I just need to protect her."

"What about _yourself_, Santana?" Quinn snapped, dropping her towel and grabbing the clothes from Santana. "And these are filthy. You can borrow some of my stuff." She stomped out of the room, pausing to toss the battered clothes into the hamper before throwing open her dresser and rummaging up a set of clean clothes for Santana to wear. "Here. I don't like the idea of anyone holding anything over you like that, San. Especially someone who deserves your loyalty as little as _she_ does."

"Jesus, she's my _mom_, Quinn. We both hate our parents but, fuck she's still my _mother!_" Santana's voice cracked and she looked up, "Do you not get that she's my only family? She's the only one and I'm her child. I'm just trying to do everyone I have to to make sure _we're okay_."

"Jesus, San, she set your dad up!" Quinn cried, grabbing the first clothes that came to hand and angrily yanking them on. "It's her fault he's in prison! How the hell can you be okay with that?"

Santana was halfway into pulling the t-shirt on when she stopped. She popped her head through and tugged on the pants before she shoved the cash in her pocket. "No. My _father_ got arrested when I was five because he's a filthy drug addict. He ruined my life and my mom's life. It's his fault she's like she is now! He's in jail because he _stole_ and he ruined my fucking life when he left."

"You really do just blindly accept the crap you're fed, don't you?" Quinn looked disgusted. "She _set him up_, San! Your mom was the one stealing from the damn clinic! And she made it look like it was his fault! You can't honestly believe your dad was stealing those drugs for _himself_ do you?"

"Doesn't matter." She crossed her arms, "My childhood, my fucking life ended when he left. If he did it to help her or she set him up it doesn't matter. He could have gotten out without evidence, he could have protected me. Now, she's too fucked to function and she's _my_ only family and I'm gonna protect her as long as I can."

"For God's sake, San, how can you be so stupid?" Quinn scowled, "You think Lima is the paragon of racial equality? Your dad is _black_ and I might be a pale ass white girl, but I can certainly recognize racism when I see it. You don't think they didn't have _evidence_ that said whatever the hell they wanted it too? Sue has evidence too. Evidence that proves the charges be was arrested for were a bunch of bull."

"Just... fuck, just shut up. I don't care!" Santana yelled, "He fucked up. He let her ruin his life like she ruined mine. He could have gotten her help, he was a fucking doctor! But no, if this is true, then he let her fucking get off and continue to pump herself full of fucking anything she could find. She's not even a person anymore! She's just a fucking shell! It's his fault! I was just a little kid! I couldn't help her! He could!"

Quinn was trembling she was so angry. "Don't you ever _think_?" she hissed. "You think I want my parents to be alcoholics? You think my sister and I haven't _tried_ to help them? Haven't gone to the goddamn _meetings_? It doesn't matter how much you love someone, Santana! Unless _they_ want to be better, _nothing_ you do _matters_! It doesn't matter if you're a doctor or a police officer or a straight A student!"

She was so frustrated by Santana's inability to listen, tears began leaking down her cheeks. "Why can't you understand that? At least your dad was _sober_..."

"My dad left. He got arrested because he wouldn't take me away from her. She... She's why everything is wrong now. Why I have to live in a motel... Why I can't go home for more than a few hours. Why I fucking sleep in the park or steal medical supplies. At least your parents can still function! At least they can remember to eat or shower or do _anything_ like a real person!" she sobbed, "I have to _clean_ her, Quinn. I have to make sure people still want her!"

"People still..." Quinn's eyes narrowed. She'd thought that the man was Maria's boyfriend or something, unpleasant as the situation she'd walked in on was. "What do you _mean_ by making sure people still want her, Santana? What's going on? No more bullshit. I'm not going to stop being your friend no matter what it is."

"How the fuck do you think we get money, Quinn? Drugs don't grow on trees!" she started spouting off in Spanish about having to sell herself and her mom. She didn't even realize that Quinn wouldn't understand, she just needed it get it out.

"Santana," Quinn bit her lip, stepping towards her friend. She understood maybe one word in ten that Santana was yelling, but she definitely recognized a couple as really bad, though she couldn't quite remember their exact meaning. She swallowed sharply against the heavy feeling in her chest. "Santana, stop..." She wrapped her arms around the slight girl, hugging her tight. "Just stop. It's okay." She blinked, swallowing again, "Well, it's _not_ okay, you shouldn't have to do this, but I don't hate you. I don't _understand_ completely but I don't hate you. I couldn't."

"Yeah, I do have to do this." she whispered, "I do have to do all of this. I have to take care of her. I can't keep the house anymore, it's been foreclosed for a year... I just.. I can't leave her like this. I'm so scared that she's gonna die that I can't just leave her. She's still my mom despite everything she's made me do, Quinn..."

"Yeah, but you shouldn't _have_ to," Quinn mumbled, pressing her lips to Santana's hair. "Let me help. I...I can buy or bring you lunch everyday. We can have dinner together sometimes. I know it's not much. Just," she hugged Santana tight, "let me have a few times a day when I know my best friend's safe? Please?"

"It's not... It's not something I can just choose not to do if I get enough food..." Santana whispered. "I just...I cant... You can't get involved in this... I owe too much, I'm in too deep. If anyone ever found out... I'd get arrested, Quinn. I can't, okay? I'm doing fine at school, I'm fine... I just... Please don't say anything. My mom's not a bad person," she trailed off, trying to not flash back to the thoughts of her first time.

Quinn swallowed. "Don't you think I'm smart enough to realize it's not that easy? I'm not Brittany, San. I just," she sighed, "I just want to know that even for a little bit each day, you're okay." She blinked back her fears, "I want to know that nothing terrible or permanent happened to you since I saw you last. I want to give you a chance to relax and be a kid with your best friend for a bit again. Can't I do that?"

Santana sniffled and nodded slowly. "I haven't been a _kid_ in a long time..." She whispered, looking up guilty. "I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want you to look at me any different after it started happening."

Quinn smiled a bit lopsidedly with a shrug, "You're still my best friend, San. Sure, I'm going to worry about you more now, but I'm way angrier at the people who forced this on you than I could ever be at you." She kissed Santana's forehead, "So don't ever worry about me not being your friend. I'm not going anywhere until we graduate and if I have my way, you'll be in the passenger seat of my car as we head off to college and leave his crappy little town in our dust. Sound like a plan?"

Santana rested her head tiredly on Quinn's shoulder as she basked in the ability to have someone holding her. "I'm scared." Santana admitted quietly, "I'm scared that I'm gonna get hurt, or my mommy's gonna die or something bad will happen to us. I don't know how much more... I just don't know Quinn," she whimpered.

"I'm here," Quinn whispered gently nuzzling her hair and holding her close. "Whenever you need me, San. I'll even leave my window unlocked for you. If it gets bad, just come to me. Okay? I don't care when or where. You're my best friend and if you need me, then I'm here for you."

Santana sniffled and she nodded. "My ass hurts." She whispered, her body feeling like it was on fire from the activities earlier in the day. "Everything hurts... always."

"Do you need to see a doctor? I can take you to the free clinic in Layfette if you need me to." Quinn stroked her hand up and down Santana's back as she spoke, holding her close. "No one has to know..."

"No... I'm okay." She whispered, "It just kinda hurts more than when Sue makes up do suicides for hours and then falling off the pyramid." She shrugged, "I'm okay. Nothing is really wrong or torn this time. I'm fine."

"Okay," Quinn didn't really look like she believed that, "but if you ever want or need to go to a doctor, I'll take you, okay? No questions asked. Just let me know and we can get in the car and go."

Santana nodded and sighed, pulling away a bit. "We should wash my clothes... I need to go home soon..." She stated as she took the wad of cash out of her hand and put it on the table. She looked at it regretfully for a moment and then back to Quinn. "Why do people pay for sex?" She honestly never understood it, she never quite understood why someone would pay for _her_.

"Because they're too desperate and stupid to put the effort in to _earn_ it," Quinn scoffed, filled with nothing but contempt for the men who used her best friend so callously as if she were some kind of chattel, "You can just leave those here. I'll wash them with my things and give them to you when we see each other next. In fact, if it will help you, I can make it a regular thing. You give me what needs washing and I'll just throw it in with my things, okay?"

"You'll do that?" Santana smiled. "Because I've been hand washing it and I try to get nice things and I don't wanna ruin them. I'm just happy that Sue let me stay on the Cheerios despite being away for forever... at least I don't have to worry about people noticing that I'm wearing the same thing to school all the time," she pointed out as she counted her money and put three hundred aside for her hotel for the next few weeks and the other amount she held in her hand. "I... I can give you money for letting me use your stuff all the time," Santana felt like she was taking so much from her friend that she didn't know how to pay her back any other way.

"If you try to pay me for doing my friend a favor, I am _going_ to get mad, San." Quinn huffed, folding her arms and giving Santana a sharp look. "You're my friend. You never have to pay me for anything like this."

Santana nodded and moved to lie on her stomach on Quinn's bed and curled around one of the girl's stuffed animals. "Okay..." She nuzzled the toy and inhaled her friend's scent as she was instantly comforted. She had lost all of her stuffed animals in the house, she didn't know where they went or who took them but they had started to leave. She wanted her life back and she turned her head away from Quinn when she felt tears falling again.

Quinn crawled on the bed behind her in the dimming afternoon light, wrapping an arm around her waist and cuddling against her back. "It'll be okay, San," she whispered, nuzzling her hair, "maybe not now, but it will be. You'll see."

"It just went all wrong." She sniffled, "No one will ever love me now..." she turned her head to watch Quinn. "No one will ever love me because of this... because my body will be... is ruined." She sighed, "I'll never be able to give myself to someone because I love them..."

"Bullshit," Quinn squeezed her tight, "you're not ruined and you can still _willingly_ give yourself to someone you love, San. You can be loved if you let people in. And anyone who would stop loving you because of this is a jerk and I'll help you kick their ass." She nodded decisively with a little snort.

"I'm an underaged prostitute. I'm a _special_ request... there are some sick fucks in this town who like to fuck thirteen year olds." She sighed, thinking about Mr. Schuester. "Some of them like it when twelve year olds suck their dicks while her mommy watches." Santana cried out softly, "No one will love me..."

"That's _not true_, Santana!" She moved until she could meet Santana's eyes with hers, "You just haven't met the right person yet. You will. I know you will. And then all of this? Won't matter. Okay?"

Santana sniffled and held the lamb stuffed animal close to her heart and nodded. "If you say so..." she was nervous about the position she was in with her friend. Quinn was leaning over her and Santana had been in this position before countless times. She looked up and watched her trying to figure out what was going on.

"Of course, I say so," Quinn smiled, "I'm your captain and that means what I say goes." She leaned down and kissed San's cheek before moving back to lie down behind her. "Do you really have to go back to the motel tonight?" she asked softly, sounding almost lonely.

"Your dad won't like that I'm here again." Santana reminded her, "I need to pay off the room too and my bag's there..." She sighed, her bag contained all her possessions. "I should also go check on my mom... her dealer needs some money I think... I can't remember but I think we owe him."

Quinn let out a shaky breath against Santana's back. "I'm scared for you," she admitted softly, "I wish I could do more, but I promise, if you ever need to get away, my window is open for you."

"He's my mom's friend." Santana said quickly, she had known the man for years and he was always nice to her. He brought her coloring books and milkshakes from the store when she was little. She was also very naive still about the world of drugs. She didn't understand that the black eyes her mom had when she was little were from not being able to pay for her weed, that she sold Santana for the first time on the dealer's request when her mom got into heroin.

"Okay," Quinn whispered, "but I still don't like it and you can still come to me whenever. Just promise you will? I don't want to lose the only friend I have who is still willing to come to my home..."

"Okay." Santana smiled softly and leaned up and kissed the corner of Quinn's lips. "I'll come by early tomorrow morning when your parents go to church." She said, as she took in as much of the warmth as she could with Quinn before getting up. "I need to go now." Santana said as she stood up and put her money in her pockets and leaned over and kissed Quinn's forehead. "I'll be okay."

Quinn sat up, watching Santana. "At least let me drive you to the motel." She started pulling on her sneakers, "It's the least I can do and it'll save you the walk in the cold."

"Your dad will be home soon..." Santana smiled sadly, "You stay here and I'll see you in the morning... I'm gonna wanna sleep so leave the left side of the bed open for me, okay?" Santana asked softly. "Don't worry so much," She said as she ran her fingers over her friend's forehead. "You're getting wrinkles."

Quinn paused in pulling her shoes on. "Okay," she sighed as Santana headed for the door, "but I want to see you when I wake up so don't dawdle coming back!"

She watched her best friend walk out of her room and collapsed back on her bed with a shaky sigh, trying to compose herself. Rolling over, she hugged her lamb to her chest. "Please, God, let her be okay. She's my best friend and she doesn't deserve this..."

* * *

Santana was headed to her motel room when she looked up saw that the door to her room was open. She tried to convince herself that maybe her mom had come, so she carefully walked in and looked around. "Mommy?" She whispered, her voice wavering. The next thing she knew, she was getting slammed up against the door. Santana started to scream but a hand covered her mouth. She looked up and saw Jose, her mom's dealer. He smiled wickedly as he saw the fear in the girl's eyes.

"So _this_ is where you've been hiding, Leila." He smiled as he pulled his hand away, "Your mommy misses you very much, why are you being such a bad girl and staying all the way out here?"

"Because, I can't sleep at home. You've seen the house… It's too cold to sleep outside." Santana whimpered as a hand moved around her slim throat. "Why… why are you hurting me, Jose?"

"You owe me money, bitch." He spat, "You're fucking junkie mom is my best client and she's not making enough money these days… No one wants to fuck a corpse." When he insulted her mom, Santana lunged out and pushed him back. She swung her hand and hit him in the face causing his nose to let out a crack. "Fucking bitch," he yelled throwing her down onto the bed.

He punched her in the face, causing a spurt of blood to spray on the blanket. He tore at the girl's clothing, using the torn shirt to bind Santana's hands together with the pink fabric. He pulled down the sweatpants and pulled out a knife. He wrapped his hand around the girl's throat again and squeezed tightly. Santana struggled against him and her eyes went wide as she saw the blade. "Don't forget who you belong to, _mija_."

He smirked as he leaned down and bit at her nipple before carving the sign on his gang onto her hip. Santana cried out as the blood flowed out of her skin, watching in horror as he laughed at her. He pulled down his pants and looked at the girl. "Not as cute now that you're older. We'll only get a little while longer out of you…" He said before pressing the knife against her throat, "Maybe we should just get rid of you and Maria…" He smiled before sliding into her, his oversized dick tearing her open as he forced his length into her dry core.

He left several hours later, leaving the girl bleeding on her bed and leaking with cum. She sobbed, when she saw him steal the money she had left over from paying her rent. She had prayed for him to kill her. She had never thought that before, but she had almost begged for it. After another hour of laying there she found strength to get up, her wrist was dislocated and her face bashed in and bleeding.

She carefully wrapped herself in the tattered clothing and a blanket off the bed and grabbed her bag. A walk that should have taken only ten minutes took nearly two hours and another 30 minutes of trying to climb the tree outside Quinn's room. Santana finally climbed in at dawn and coughed out Quinn's name.

"Q…" she rasped, the hand prints bruising her skin having darkened even further over the last few hours.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Quinn blinked slowly awake at the sense of someone being in the room with her and the raspy sound of a voice calling her nickname. "San?" she mumbled sleepily, sitting up, "Is that you?"

She reached over and switched on her bedside lamp, blinking painfully at the bright light before turning her tired gaze to her friend. When she saw her, the remaining vestiges of sleep burned away and she ripped the covers off her, almost tangling her feet in her haste to get to the other girl.

"Oh my God, Santana!" She grabbed her just before she collapsed, helping her to the bed and anxiously checking her injuries. "W-what _happened_? This... Please tell me this isn't normal!"

The battered girl looked up through pained eyes. She felt Quinn taking off the blanket the covered her bare torso, the shirt she had been wearing still tied limply around her wrists. "I ripped your shirt," she slurred, her eyes not focusing on anything. Santana had no clothes on so the brand on her hip shone bright with aggravation. "I'm sorry..." She rasped out, "I never thought he'd hurt me." She watched Quinn out of blurry eyes.

"I don't care about the damn _shirt_, San," Quinn hissed, her voice trembling with emotion as she hurried to the bathroom to get the first aid kit she used at Cheerios practice. "That son of a..." She clenched her jaw, shaking her head as she started rummaging through the kit for supplies.

Her hand hesitated over the surgical gloves and she glanced at San out of the corner of her eye. Hating herself, she pulled out a pair and slid them on her hands. She couldn't risk possible infection and she didn't know what sort of horrible things could have been done to her best friend.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, before gripping Santana's nose and pulling it straight with a sharp pop. "You have to let me take you to the clinic now, San. I...I can't take care of all this on my own..."

Santana whimpered. "Hurts," she whispered as her nose was realigned. She was losing eyesight due to the blood pooling up behind her socket. She felt her head lull to the side. "We go," she slurred, her body unable to keep up with the pain coursing through her. Santana didn't even care that she was basically naked with cum dried and clinging in blotchy patches on her stomach and thighs as she tried to pull the blanket around her with her dislocated wrist.

Quinn nodded, stepping to her closet to grab an oversized button up shirt she'd stolen from Finn back when they were dating and placing it around Santana's shoulders as she toed her shoes on. "We're going right now, Santana. I'm going to get you help." She helped her up, finally resorting to lifting her into a fireman's carry, "Just hold on. You'll be okay."

Hurrying down the stairs before anyone else even woke up, she got out the front door as quickly as she could, not even bothering with a coat despite the cold air outside. She placed Santana into the passenger seat and buckled her up before getting into the car and debating with herself if the clinic could handle it or if she should just take her to St Rita's or Lima Memorial.

Santana mumbled, "Cops... no cops." She grumbled as she reached her left hand over to Quinn and groped for her hand. Even though she ended up holding a gloved hand, Santana needed the feeling of warmth against her skin. She needed to stay grounded. "Don't feel good..."

Quinn nodded jerkily, turning the car towards the highway and out of town. "It'll be okay, San. Just hold on." She squeezed her hand, "Please."

* * *

Once on the highway, she gunned the engine, going well over the speed limit as she headed for the Bluffton hospital. It was the closest one she could think of outside of Lima. She didn't care if she got a giant ticket for speeding down the empty highway. She just wanted to get her friend to help.

Santana breathed shallowly as they drove, more or less passed out when the blonde pulled up to the hospital and the nurses helped move her from the car to a gurney. They wheeled Santana into the trauma room and began checking her over.

One of the nurses looked up at Quinn. "What happened to her?" Quinn couldn't answer as she stared blankly at the sight of them intubating the girl carefully as they could due to her partially crushed windpipe. They cut off the remaining shreds of her pants and draped her with a gown.

One of the other trauma nurses spoke to the doctor, updating him on the situation. "She's got extensive bruising and what may be dried semen on her thighs, vaginal area and stomach. Her nose appears broken as well as her right eye socket. She looks to have bruises on her ribs as well.

The doctor nodded. "We need a chest x-ray to check her lung function," she called to an orderly as she spared a brief glance for the worried girl standing near her table. "How old is she, miss?"

"Fifteen." Quinn looked haggard with worry, her hair still hanging messily around her head. "I think she's been r-raped... please, you have to help her. She's my best friend; you have to help her..."

The doctor's attention jerked from Santana back to Quinn. "Fifteen?" She was surprised, but bit back her shock as she continued to work on the girl, nodding for a nurse to remove Quinn from the bay so they could work.

"Come on, sweetie, we'll get you cleaned up while they work on your friend." One of the older nurses escorted Quinn out and brought her to another room with a sink. She helped Quinn take off the gloves and got a wet cloth and wiped the girl's tears away. "You can be scared, sweetie. No one should see someone like that, let alone live it... We'll take good care of her. Do you know her parents' phone number? We're going to have to call them and the police."

Quinn shook her head. "You _can't_," her voice cracked as she said it, tears trickling down her cheeks. "They'll..." she shook her head, "you can't report this, please. She'll hate me if I let you. _Please_." She was begging, but it was all she could do. "Her parents... Her dad's in prison for something he didn't even _do_ and her mom... There's no point in calling anyone. Please, she's my _best friend_..."

"Okay." The nurse sighed. "Let's get her fixed up and then we can go from there." She smiled and brought Quinn to the family room to wait.

* * *

Two hours later, the nurse came back into the family room and gently shook Quinn's shoulder. "Sweetie, do you want to come see your friend?" she whispered.

Quinn blinked blearily up at her having fallen asleep after begging Sue to cover for her with her parents because Santana had been hurt while going into as few details as possible. "I can see her?" Her voice was rough with sleep and she cleared it before speaking again. "She's okay, right?"

"She's a very strong girl. Her guardian came and signed a release for her treatment so we are looking to see if we will have to take her to surgery," the nurse explained as she escorted the girl into the private room. Santana was still intubated, her face black and blue and her nose had a splint on it. Her right hand was resting in a splint and there was a tube running out the side of her chest. "We just got the papers signed to check her for rape like you said. We had to wait to get the ability to check her over since she's a minor." She swallowed, shaking her head as she brought the girl over to a chair.

Quinn reached up and carefully took Santana's left hand in hers. "Her guardian?" She looked confused. "She has a guardian?" She shook her head, resolving not to worry about it. "Will...will she be tested for, you know, illnesses and things? Stuff she might have caught from the bastard that did this to her?" Her hand tightened on Santana's without her realizing it as she spoke.

"A tall woman with short hair? Kinda of scary? She brought in medical power of attorney a few hours ago," she said as she updated Santana's chart. "We will test her, now that we have permission... but nothing will show up from this attack yet. Are... Miss, are you worried because you think she's been attacked before? She had many old fractures in her bones as well as her face and additional fracturing to her pelvis that looks to be healing, but it's at least a few months old." She sighed and went about cleaning one of the cuts on Santana's face. "Is she involved with any gangs?"

"Sue," Quinn muttered with a sigh of relief, only half listening to the nurse as she talked. "I... not gangs. She isn't like that. She's way too smart to get involved with gangs, but...she's been hurt before. This was the first time she came to me after though. I couldn't just...I made her come. Please don't report her because of me." Her eyes never left the sleeping girl's face as she spoke, worry evident in her entire demeanor.

"Okay, we'll get her tested and started on an anti-viral series of medication right away just in case," the nurse said as she wrote down the orders she knew the doctor would want. "I ask about the gang because someone branded her. It's a gang symbol I've seen before and I was worried that this was more than what she's telling you." She sighed and moved to leave the room. "Hit that button if you need anything," she said, motioning to the call button on the wall.

"It's her mom," Quinn whispered only barely loud enough for the nurse to hear. "This...all of this is because of her _mom_." She sniffed slightly, finally glancing away from Santana to meet the nurse's gave. "That awful woman destroyed _everything_ that was good for her and I can't do _anything_ to fix it."

"Okay," she said quietly. "We'll fix your friend up. Don't worry." She nodded before leaving the two girls in the room. Only the sounds of the respirator and the heart monitor could be heard through the room. Santana lay sleeping on the bed as her body fought to keep her alive.

Quinn let out a shaky breath, leaning over until her forehead pressed against Santana's arm. "Please be okay," she whispered, adding a silent prayer to her plea, "please, San. I need you to be okay..."

A few minutes later, Santana's fingers flexed around Quinn's. Dark eyes blinked open - her right eye barely opened, but it was the best she could do with the swelling - and she could look around the room. She couldn't move much but she knew Quinn was with her. She squeezed the girl's hand and blinked again.

Quinn looked up quickly at the squeeze giving Santana a tremulous smile. "Hi," she breathed, reaching up with a free hand to brush away her tears. "You had me pretty scared." She did her best to sound upbeat and as if her fears and worry were wiped away by the simple fact that Santana had woken up.

Santana couldn't move her other hand and she was scared. Tears blinked out of her eyes and she struggled with the tube in her throat as she looked at Quinn. She couldn't remember why she was in pain, or why she couldn't move or talk. Her heart monitor picked up as her fear began pushing adrenaline into her system, spiking her heart rate.

"Hey," Quinn squeezed her hand, trying to reassure her, "calm down, San. You got beat up pretty bad and I was scared so I brought you to Bluffton and the hospital here. We're not in Lima and they promised not to call the cops. Sue signed off as your guardian for you to get help. It's okay. I won't let anyone hurt you here."

The immobile girl looked scared still but then looked into Quinn's eyes and nodded slowly. She watched her and her heart started slowly beating at a normal pace. She kept her relatively undamaged eye locked with Quinn's as she squeezed her hand. She took a breath and struggled a bit on the bed, she wanted the tubes out of her body.

"Hold on, San," Quinn murmured, not looking away as she reached up and hit the call button for the nurse.

A couple of minutes later, the nurse that had spoken with Quinn earlier walked in, "Yes, dear?"

"She's awake. Can," she took a breath, composing herself, "does she have to have that tube in now?"

"Let me check if she's triggering the vent..." the nurse checked Santana over, she was mildly concerned that her eyes were not focusing but she hoped it was that she was scared verses anything else. "Okay. Let me get the doctor." A few minutes later the doctor who had worked on her before came in and gave her some medication to calm her down so they could remove the tube without hurting her. Once she relaxed enough, they carefully pulled out the tube in her throat.

"Okay, Miss," the doctor started as she fixed an oxygen mask over her face, "you need to try to not talk. Your throat had some compression damage and you strained your windpipe and vocal cords pretty good. If it gets hard to breathe again, we'll have to put the tube back in, okay?" she said softly and Santana nodded. With a smile, she left, leaving the nurse to check over Santana, paying especial attention to checking her vision.

"Sweetheart, can you see much of anything right now?" she asked and Santana squeezed Quinn's hand, then shook her head no. "Okay let me drain the blood." She went and grabbed a needle and numbed the area. "You might want to look away," she said to Quinn before slipping the curved needle under Santana's eyes and draining the blood pooling behind it in her eye socket. "That should be better. I'll come back in soon."

Santana blinked slowly and looked at Quinn. She then looked up to the ceiling and breathed slowly.

"Please don't be mad at me," Quinn whispered, "I thought you were going to die. I had to do something, had to bring you here." She squeezed the hand she'd held through the extubation and the draining of blood behind her eyes, "I'm so glad you woke up, San." Her voice wavered with emotion - so unlike the stoic front she usually presented to the world - making her sound scared and younger than her sixteen years. "Sue's covering for us, telling my father she called an early surprise practice if he asks." She watched Santana, a tear slowly welling in her eye and trickling down her cheek, "You don't have to talk, just please don't be mad. I couldn't lose you, I just couldn't."

Santana blinked. She still couldn't move her body with the amount of pain she was in. She couldn't speak because she didn't want Quinn to know that she wanted to die. That she wished for him to kill her. Santana closed her eyes and took a wavering breath. She didn't know what she looked like. She couldn't remember what had happened. All she knew is that she wanted to sleep. That she wanted to go and hide and not let anyone look at her.

When Santana closed her eyes and shut off from Quinn, the blonde leaned forward and rested her forehead against the back of the hand she held. "I'm sorry," she whispered, "I couldn't think of anything and I was scared to lose you. Please don't hate me. I know I messed up and didn't do what you wanted but please don't hate me..."

"Don't hate you," Santana whimpered her voice scratchy from getting throttled and the tube in her throat. She opened her eyes again and groaned as she tried to move her broken wrist to take off her mask. She gave up half way through and just turned her head slightly to look at Quinn.

Quinn lifted her head a bit to let Santana see the raw and emotional wateriness in her eyes. "You're all I have that's really _good_ anymore, San. No," she raised her hand to keep her from speaking with a scared look, afraid if she didn't say what was on her mind now, she never would, "don't speak. You are. You're my best friend, the only person I'd want as my right hand. And you don't judge me. You don't expect me to be wonderful and perfect and... and _thin_ all the time." Tears trickled down her cheek as her tongue slipped out to moisten her lips. "I couldn't bear to lose you. I need you in my life, Santana..."

Santana tiredly lifted the arm that Quinn had been holding up and wiped a tear off her pale face. The girl just watched her for a few minutes and kept stroking her face slowly. Her breath was labored as she watched Quinn struggle with herself. She couldn't feel anything other than pain. Her head was pounding and her right eyelid had closed of its own accord from the swelling in her face. "I asked him to kill me," she mumbled, not sure if Quinn would be able to understand her.

Quinn heard. She didn't understand, but she definitely heard. Her jaw worked as she tried to swallow down the anger and pain the words brought. "Oh," she finally whispered, her voice shattering over the painful words she was forcing out. "I, um, I guess I shouldn't have brought you here then." She blinked, trying hard to push her stoic mask back into place. It was hard, so hard. This was _Santana_. Her best friend and the only person who made her feel like she was worth something as she already was. "I-if that's how you feel..."

She felt as broken inside as Santana looked on the outside in that moment, but she'd learned early that showing pain was a weakness for others to exploit. She squeezed her eyes shut, fighting down the pain. Her fingers slackened around Santana's hand slightly, but despite it all, she couldn't bring herself to pull away from the other girl completely.

"I wanted him to stop... It hurt and I... was wanting to stop hurting you too," Santana whispered. "I thought it was the only way for it to stop... so I held my breath." She was trying to explain even though it hurt to talk. "I held my breath until I passed out and he thought I died." She sniffled and looked at Quinn. "I didn't want to break my promise to you that I wouldn't get hurt."

Quinn's eyes flashed open, bright with pained anger. Her hand tightened on Santana's again. "Don't you _ever_ think I'll be better off with my best friend _dead_, Santana!" she hissed. "If you're being hurt, do whatever you have to for it to stop and then come to _me_ and let me do whatever I have to to make it _better_."

She raised their rejoined hands to her face, pressing a light kiss to the back of her best friend's hand before pressing it to her cheek. "I need you in my life. You're the only reason I can resist my parents' demands and be myself as best I can. I don't care about broken promises so long as I can help you be okay again..."

The younger girl whimpered. "Stop. Listen, Q," she mumbled. "I... made _him_ think I was dead so he'd stop. I came to you... I came to you for help." Santana tried to make Quinn understand as she spoke. "I just... I needed him to stop. It hurt so bad, Quinn... It hurts."

It was enough to break her from her anger. Letting go of Santana's hand for a moment, she stood and leaned in to hug her best friend gently, "I know," she whispered in her ear. "I know you did. I'm just... I was so scared you'd die, San. I wish I could make it stop hurting. I wish I could."

"What's wrong with me?" She sniffled. "Everything hurts and... and my eyes hurt and my hand..." She looked up with a pale gaze. "I don't have enough money to pay to be in the hospital," she whispered looking away. "No insurance."

"Sue's taking care of it, Santana. Don't worry about it." Quinn pulled back, taking Santana's hand again to maintain their connection. "You were beaten so _bad_. They're talking about surgery to fix some things still. You," she shook her head, her voice wavering, "you need to get out, San. Before they _kill_ you."

"Oh," she whispered, as she closed her eyes. "I hope they don't kill my mom," she said as she looked up to Quinn. "I just don't know how to make this all stop, how to make all of this end." She sighed and squeezed Quinn's hand. "Will you stay when I get surgery? I don't wanna be here alone."

Quinn offered her a lopsided smile. "Of course I'll stay, San. What kind of friend would I be if I bailed on you when you needed me most? I'll stay as long as I can and if they make me leave then," she looked determined, "I'll skip school tomorrow and be here first thing, okay?"

"Don't skip," Santana said sternly. "I'll probably be in surgery tomorrow morning so don't skip... just come after and help me wake up?" she asked sadly. "I don't wanna wake up if you're not here."

"I'll be here." Quinn nodded determinedly. "Nothing is going to keep me from being here when you wake up. I promise."

Santana nodded and her eyes fell closed at Quinn's words. She clutched the other girl's hand as she fell back into a fitful slumber.

* * *

The following day, Santana had been taken into surgery early in the morning. She needed to get adhesions revolved from her uterus, her pelvis reset, surgery to set the bones in her hand properly and plastics needed to check her face and the brand carved into her hip. It had taken several hours before she was brought out of the ICU and into a standard room. Sue Sylvester, of all people, sat guard in the room as she was weaned off the sedative.

Quinn slipped through the door about twenty minutes after Santana was brought out of surgery with a small teddy bear with sunglasses and a heart tattoo on it's arm. She almost jumped at the sight of her coach sitting beside her friend. "C-coach Sylvester, what are you...?"

A blonde brow rose in sardonic query. "I'm her guardian, Q. I could be asking you the same thing as it's only," she didn't even glance at the clock on the wall, "ten in the morning and I haven't announced a school wide evacuation this morning so shouldn't your perky blonde self be in class?"

"She's my best friend," Quinn replied, walking in and dragging the room's other chair over to Santana's left side, taking her hand, "and I promised her I'd be here when she woke up."

"Admirable. In a pathetically childish sort of way. Next time inform me before you decide to skip and I'll give you a more plausible excuse," Sue drolled, standing and dusting off her nylon pants. "Now, I find I have a certain vendetta to carry out with a members of a certain group that feels they can operate with impunity in _my_ town. I'll see you tomorrow at practice, Q."

Sue left with as little fanfare as she'd arrived with, leaving Quinn staring at her in confusion, not at all understanding what had happened.

* * *

Santana remained sleeping for the better part of the morning. A resident came in nearly an hour and a half after Quinn arrived to cast her arm. She smiled at Quinn when she realized the girl was there.

"What color would she want?" she asked showing a large array of choices.

"You don't seem to have black," Quinn glanced up with a tired smirk. "Orange," she ran her thumb gently over the back of Santana's hand, looking back at the sleeping girl, "strong and fiery like her, but bright and hopeful too. She needs things like that. And," she glanced up at the resident with a hopefully teasing smirk, "if she doesn't like it, she can bitch at me."

"Sounds perfect!" she said with a smile and started casting her hand. "Are you her sister?"

Quinn raised a disbelieving brow at the resident for a moment before shaking her head. "No, I'm her best friend. I brought her in last night."

"Oh, okay." She smiled. "She looks like a strong girl." She continued to apply strips of plaster sheathing to Santana's arm. "She had quite a surgery this morning."

"I know she's strong," Quinn whispered, watching her work. "Stronger than me. I never would have survived what she's been through."

"She'll get better. One attack hopefully won't ruin her life, she might need some therapy and help but she'll be okay." The nurse finished bandaging her arm and finished the cast. "She's going to be in the hospital for a few days." Santana eyes began to flutter open and struggle against the medications as the nurse headed out of the room.

"If it was just one, I wouldn't worry so much," Quinn muttered, reaching up to gently squeeze Santana's shoulder as she stirred. "Good afternoon, sleepy," she smiled bright as she could, her tone teasing, "welcome back."

"You're pretty," Santana whispered as she looked at the girl. She wasn't lucid by any means but she looked at Quinn like she was her savior. "I saw you. When I was asleep."

"Not nearly as pretty as you. Everyone knows that." Quinn laughed softly. "Did you? Dreaming about me now, Lopez? Should I be worried?" she teased Santana, trying her best to be cheerful and as normal as possible around her while she was recovering.

"Uh huh," she croaked. "You had wings and pretty white clothes," she spoke softly, still almost half asleep. "You came and saved me." She smiled the best she could with the bandages and swelling.

"Well, I'm certainly no angel," Quinn snorted softly, trying not to laugh, "but if I can come save you, I always will."

The darker girl pouted. "You're my angel. My angel who looks like my friend. My friend, Quinn. She's so pretty and nice... even when she's a bitch," Santana rambled as she lost her focus.

Quinn laughed finally catching on that Santana was still under the influence of her medications. "Sure, Santana. Is your friend a bitch a lot? She shouldn't be."

"I like it. She's not scared of me," Santana said as she tried to move around a bit. "She's really hot when she's a bitch," she whispered out as she flexed her left hand and brought it up to her face. She touched her bandages and winced. "Ouch. Hurts, Angel-Quinn."

"She's hot, huh?" Quinn smiled lopsidedly, reaching over to gently pull her casted arm back down. "Hey, don't do that. You've been hurt really bad and it scared me...I mean your friend. It scared your friend a lot to see you that hurt. She really likes you, you know."

"Got scared. Went home and my door was open. I thought my mom came to see me, but she wasn't there," she whispered as she looked up at her friend. "She wasn't there. She never goes anywhere. But he was there and he hurt me. I left when I could and went to Quinn's house even though it hurt to walk. I needed her."

"She wishes you hadn't gone, but she's glad you came to her, Santana," Quinn whispered, reaching up to brush some hair out of Santana's face and trying not to think about what could of happened if she hadn't been strong enough to make it to her. "She needed to be able to help you."

Santana nodded and drifted back off to sleep. Nearly an hour later she woke back up confused. "Where... am I?" Santana rasped as she tried to sit up then realized how much pain she was in and she let out a pained scream. "Quinn!" she called out as she realized something was very wrong with her lower body. "Why does it hurt so much?"

Quinn jerked up from where she'd drifted off in the seat next to Santana's bed, their hands still tangled together. "W-what? Where?" She shook her head to get rid of the last vestiges of sleep, "San, calm down. I'm here, okay? You're okay." It felt like she was always explaining what had happened to Santana to her and she was starting to get worried. "You were in surgery this morning. You were hurt really bad, San. Do you remember anything?"

"N-no," she whimpered as she lay back down, tears falling from her eyes. "My... my head and hips hurt. Surgery? Why surgery?" She looked at Quinn and held her hand with a shaky grip. "Why hurt?"

"Your pelvis was broken, San." Quinn swallowed as she remembered the laundry list of things they'd had to fix in her friend. "So was your face. They had to do surgery to fix you, San. You were so _hurt_." Her voice was breathy with how hard she was trying to hold back tears, squeezing Santana's hand as if she was afraid if she let go, she'd disappear.

"Oh," she whispered, looking down at her body. "Did I get hit by a car?" she asked innocently as she looked to her friend. "I think this is what it would feel like..." She held onto Quinn's hand and whispered softly, "I got hit by a car... _right_?" She sniffled as she hoped for that to be the reason why she was in the hospital.

She wanted to lie. Wanted to tell her that's all it was. But she knew she couldn't. That one day Santana would remember and she'd hate her for lying.

Her face crumpled as she slowly shook her head, taking in a shaky breath. "I'm sorry, San. Y-you don't deserve this. No. It...it wasn't a car. I'm so sorry..."

Santana looked at her and blinked, remembering everything. "Please just tell me I got hit by a car," she pleaded. "Just... please."

"I can't, Santana." Quinn shook her head, her eyes bright with unshed tears. "I can't lie to you. We both know what happened. Please don't make me lie. Not to you..."

The darker girl nodded and looked down at her hands. "Okay," she whimpered as she felt her hands shaking and she whispered softly. "I... I can't deal with this... I don't want anyone to know. I don't want anyone to find out. They'll arrest me, my mom... ruin everything."

"We're not in Lima," Quinn whispered. "They promised the cops wouldn't be called, that this wouldn't be reported. All they know is that you were," she choked on the word, had to force it out, "were r-raped. You don't get arrested for being raped, San."

"Violent crimes get reported," she whispered. "Do they know my name?" She started looking around for an escape route in case they did. If they knew her name she'd get found, so she had to leave no matter how much it hurt.

"I don't think so... No one asked me. Sue may have given a name for you but I don't know what." Quinn frowned. "San, what are you doing? You can't leave. Where will you go? Back to the motel? At least, here you're safe!"

"I... I'm not safe here," she whispered, her eyes shifting around. "They'll find me... either the cops or someone else. What if someone recognizes me or sees me here?" She was panicking and scared that someone would come and find her and see Quinn there and hurt her too. "What if they hurt you?"

"They don't have anything to hold over me, San. If they try to hurt me, I'll go straight to the cops." Quinn looked fiercely determined. "You have to get well. You only help _them_ going back out hurt like this. What if next time they kill you? Have you thought about that? What would I do if you were killed, huh? You think my life would be wonderful if I had as many friends as...as _Manhands_?"

Santana laughed softly. "Always about you," she said softly as she looked to her friend. "Come lay with me please?"

"Hey, I'm the captain, right?" Quinn's lips twitched into a wry smirk. "And you don't care enough about yourself, so I've got to get you to be careful _some_how." She looked from Santana to the door for a moment before sighing and giving in. "Okay, but don't move or I'm getting up, understand?"

Without waiting for an answer, she fiddled with the side rail on the bed before she figured out how to lower it. Once she got it down, she gingerly climbed on the bed and stretched out beside her best friend, trying to avoid touching her for fear of hurting her. "I...this isn't too much, is it? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

"I'm so doped up on pain meds that I doubt I'd feel it," Santana whispered as she reached her hand out to Quinn. "Can we run away? Start over? Make everything go away?" she whispered as she rested her head against Quinn's shoulder, needing contact.

"Sure." Quinn smiled sadly, gingerly looping an arm around her friend's waist. "But where would we go and how would we pay for it? We have to finish high school at least, or we could both end up stuck in the situation you're in. We have to be able to get jobs, San. Real ones."

"I can take care of you," Santana whispered as she closed her eyes. "I'll take care of you forever. Your family doesn't deserve you... I'll take care of you."

"Your family doesn't deserve you either, San." Quinn pressed a gentle kiss to Santana's least damaged cheek. "Why not let me take care of you? I'm in a bit better shape after all." She tried to tease, but it came out a bit flat. "We'll get out of here, San. But we need to save up some more money first. I don't want you to ever have to do again what you do for money now. Not for me. I don't ever want you to feel you have to do that for me. Understand?"

She nodded and sighed, not knowing how she'd be able to do anything ever again. She had lost her ambition lately, she used to dream about getting out, about doing something with her life that was anything but what she did; but lately she just assumed that it was how it was going to be for the rest of her life. "Okay."

"We'll get you help. I won't leave you here, Santana. I promise." She snuggled as close as she dared with how hurt Santana was. "You'll get out. _Alive_. And I'm going to help in anyway I can."

"Okay," Santana whispered and held onto the other girl to try as hard as she could to believe her. "Okay. We'll be okay..."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

It had been a week.

Santana had to stay under medical supervision for a longer time because of her lapses of memory and the trauma. Several days' later, she was told to stay off her hips as much as possible while her fractures were healing as she was finally allowed to check out of the hospital. She had crutches, but her dislocated wrist made them more difficult to use.

Santana leaned against the front of the hospital, her weight pressing down onto the arm-pit braces of the crutches as she waited for the car to roll up to the curb, RayBans covering her black and blood-shot eyes and a hooded sweatshirt pulled up over her head.

* * *

"This is not snappy, Q. I specifically requested _snappy_."

Quinn rolled her eyes as she pulled up in front of the hospital. Having to drive Sue the twenty miles to Bluffton when she went to pick up Santana had not been on the top of her to-do list, but she hadn't really been in a position to refuse when the demanding coach had been her excuse out of school in time to pick up Santana.

"I can't exactly control _traffic_, Coach," she snapped, throwing the car into park and getting out. Her expression softened as she rounded the hood of the car and spotted Santana. "Hey, S. Ready to go home?"

"Home?" she questioned as she fumbled with her crutches on her way over to the car. "I don't have a home so I'm not really sure where you're taking me." She sighed as she looked down to the ground as she moved slowly. "Why is she here?"

"She's -" Quinn began as she wrapped an arm around Santana's waist to help support her, only to be cut off.

"_She_ would be the source of your home," Sue responded, rolling the window down and looking Santana over with a sneer. "You look even more like a sloppy baby than usual, S. That is not acceptable in the second in command of my Cheerios. You'll be staying with me so I can properly oversee your physical therapy regimen."

Santana looked terrified for a moment. She looked at Quinn and then back to the other woman. "I... I can't do that. I need to go home, I need to go to my mom," she stated, not knowing that Sue knew everything about her mother or that she'd paid Maria Lopez to sign over her child to the blonde coach. "I have a motel room. My bag's there, Quinn... I need my bag."

"I got it already, San," Quinn murmured, helping her into the passenger seat so Santana could ride reclined. "Sue found your room and everything."

"As if it's possible to hide things from me." Sue shook her head with a disgusted snort. "I thought you knew better, S. I'm like your pathetic and miserable Christian God. I know all and I see all."

"I thought that was Santa?" The darker girl smirked to herself as she reached over and took Quinn's hand to try and calm her nerves as she tried to get comfortable for the ride back to Lima. She knew Sue was judging her, that the gigantic blonde would make her life hell for lying to her for years. So Santana just let her head fall back and she sighed.

"My network is far more extensive than anything that fat old man could dream of," Sue huffed, leaning back against her seat. "Home, Q. And this time make it _snappy_!"

"And again, Coach, I don't control the _traffic_," Quinn growled, letting go of Santana's hand to put the car into drive and then taking it again.

* * *

Eventually, the length of the car ride became too much and Santana couldn't control her tremors in her hands as she struggled with the pain of sitting in the car as Quinn drove. Sue continued to spew her plans for world dominion but Santana tuned her out. At some point she fell asleep and didn't realize when they had pulled into the coach's house on the outskirts of Lima.

Quinn reached over and shook her gently. "Hey. San, wake up. We're here. Come on."

Sue opened her door and got out. "When she finally wakes up, bring her inside. A room has been prepared."

"Don't wanna stay here," Santana whispered as she cracked her eyes open. "Don't wanna stay." She clutched Quinn's hand and looked up, "Don't want charity, don't want pity. Can you just take me back to my hotel?"

Quinn took a breath. "Santana, I don't like this either, but - look at me, okay? - you know they can find you in a motel or a hotel and neither of us have the money to afford one right now anyway. But do you know _anyone_ who'd willingly mess with Sue?" She got out and came around to open the car door and help Santana out. "You're safe here."

Santana got out silently. She used her crutches to get to the door of her own accord. She didn't want to be here dealing with Sue and her pity and awful attitude, but at the same time she didn't want to show Quinn how scared she was to be out of the hospital or how much pain she was in. She managed to get up the steps into the house, but almost immediately had trouble trying to not get her crutches stuck on the trophy stacked everywhere.

"San?" Quinn called from the door, hesitating to come in uninvited. "Do you want me to come in with you?"

"Are you allowed? Is your dad gonna be pissed you're here?" Santana said curtly, she was a little more than upset that she couldn't stay with her best friend because the girl's parents hated her so much. She couldn't even stay with Brittany because the blonde had no idea she got hurt again. Santana needed Quinn more than she was willing to admit to herself, but she also knew she didn't want to be alone.

Quinn jerked back, startled by the curt tone. "I... San, I..." Hurt flashed across her expression for a second before being buried behind the stoic mask she showed the world. "If you don't want me here, I'll go. I'm sorry everything is so messed up for you, Santana. But you don't have to take it out on me. I'm just trying to help you."

Santana looked down. "I _always_ want you around. I don't want to stay here. I don't want to be here," Santana admitted. "If I could run, I'd be running away, but I can't. I can't even walk much. I don't want to be here. I want to be with you and I fucking _can't_ so I'm gonna have to deal with being Sue's charity bitch for a bit."

Quinn finally came into the trophy cluttered house to wrap her arms around Santana and hug her. "I know you don't. I don't even blame you. But we don't have any other options right now. I'm sorry, San. I'm sorry I don't have the money to get you or us out of here. I'm sorry everything is terrible..."

"I'm your friend, not your sister or wife. You don't have to pay for me or make life suck less. You just need to be my friend." She sighed as she let her chin rest against the girl's shoulder. "Can we find me a bed? Or a coffin? Fuck if I know what this crazy place is gonna have in it."

"I know I don't have to," she carefully picked Santana up with a soft grunt of effort, "but I want to. I care about you." She carried Santana back to the room Sue had shown her earlier.

"Now that's what I like to see." Sue sounded a bit approving. "A bit sapphic, but there isn't a lot wrong with that that a healthy daily dose of testosterone couldn't fix."

Santana glared when she got put onto the bed. "I'm not an invalid," she said before a tiny pout crossed her lips at Sue's words. Santana looked around the room and noticed there were not that many trophies in the room and it was simply decorated. She saw her backpack and the stuffed lamb from Quinn's room on the bed. She looked up at her friend with damp eyes. "For me to sleep with?"

"Well, what else would you do with a stuffed animal?" Quinn asked with a lopsided smile. "You always cuddle with him when you come over, so I thought you'd like something familiar. There's some extra things in your bag too."

"Touching as this all is, I'm not covering for you forever, Q. Go home and deal with your parents." Quinn scowled but Sue just folded her arms and stared until she leaned over to gently kiss Santana's forehead, whispering that she'd see her soon, and left. "Now that Blondie's gone," her stern expression softened slightly, "are you comfortable, S? Need anything special diet-wise after the surgery?"

Santana held tightly to the lamb as her coach spoke. She pulled some papers out of her pocket and looked at the instructions. "I can't have much solid typed food because of my face and jaw..." She swallowed as she looked at the list. "I can't have dairy or citrus right now..." she blinked back tears as she read that she was on post-exposure medications for HIV, "and my other medications make my stomach hurt pretty bad." She sighed, shrugging as best she could. "Other than that I'm fine," she lied as she looked to the floor, finally taking off the sunglasses to show her yellowed eyes behind dark bruises.

"Bullshit, S. You've been severely beaten and raped. From the looks of it, this isn't the first time either." Sue's lips tightened as she came over to sit on the edge of the bed. "Now, I like you. You remind me of a young Sue Sylvester, albeit not as attractive, and what I don't like is seeing you hurt like this."

"I'll be fine in a couple days then I'll be outta your way," Santana said stone faced, still not having fully accepted the extent of her wounds. She let her fingers on her broken hand tug at the ears of the toy as she talked to her coach.

Sue sighed. "Let me level with you, S. I don't like seeing _any_ of my girls hurt. I especially dislike seeing my _elite_, of which you are definitely a part, hurt. Now you are going to stay here until you are back at one hundred and ten percent fighting trim. If anyone tries to hurt you while you're here, I'll kill them." Her words were matter of fact.

"Now, clean your ears out and listen up because this is how we're going to handle this. First, you were not raped, you were involved in a hit and run. The public does not need to know you were violated, but trust that measures are in place to ensure your attacker will _not_ be hurting anyone else in this fashion."

"If they can't get to me, they'll go after my mom. She can't... she needs me to protect her okay? She's sick and I need to help her if they touch her," Santana tried to explain. "I take care of her." She looked up, pleading with her. "I don't even care anymore what people think," she mumbled and looked down suddenly worried if her mom was even still alive without Santana helping her in a week. "I need to see my mom."

Sue shook her head. "It's best you don't. You... don't want to see."

That scared Santana. She stood up, not caring about her pain or her crutches and tried to limp to the door. "What did you do?" Santana screamed. "What did you do?!" She made it half way to the door before she fell with a cry. She was sobbing and trying to drag herself further despite the intense pain it sent through her. She knew something was wrong. She knew by going to the hospital she abandoned her mom. "Where is she?! I need to go, let me go!"

"What did _I_ do?" Sue stood up, outraged, grabbing Santana with only the bare minimum of regard to her injuries and dropping her back on the bed. "Stop being a spoiled brat! Do you have _any_ idea what she decided to do? Who she was _selling herself to_? I can't protect people who won't even _try_ to protect themselves and neither can you!"

"She's my fucking mother, do you fucking think I don't _know_ who she sold herself to? Who she sold _me_ to? How 'bout I make your fucking life and tell you what people in this town like to fuck little girls? Who get off on beating up their _student_? Who stole a Cheerio's uniform to give to a fucking hooker!" she screamed. "I want to _go_! She's sick and she needs my help and I'm trying the best I can to make sure she's okay. I want my mom. I want my fucking mom!"

"Fine!" Sue threw up her hands, scowling. "You want to see her so bad, I'll damn well _take_ you to her! But you're taking your medications _first_, understand?"

Santana quickly took her medications and looked expectantly at her coach. "I want my mom."

Sue straightened from the doorway and grabbed the girl's crutches. "Fine. We're wasting daylight." Stepping to her, she lifted her easily and walked out of the house into her garage, buckling Santana into the passenger side of the oversized black Hummer before getting in herself.

Starting the SUV and hitting the garage button, she backed out and down her drive. Peeling out into the street, she tore down the road. "I'm taking you to her, but you better not get pissed at me again about what you find."

* * *

Santana knew something was wrong the minute she got out. She saw the door open and she got out of the car without her crutches and hobbled into her house. It was silent. "Mommy?" Santana called out, her voice wavering as she stepped over glass and garbage to head to the back bedroom. "_Donde esta_? Mommy. I'm sorry, I got sick again," she said into the silent house. When she pushed open the bedroom door she saw her mom on her side. "Mommy, why you sleeping so early?" she whispered as she pushed through the foul stench in the room to her mother. She used her sleeve to push the dirty needles off the bed and roll her mom over.

She was _cold_.

"M-mommy?" Santana's voice broke as she looked at her mom's blue face and open eyes. She had bruises that mirrored the ones on her own body around her neck. "Mommy, wake up," Santana whispered. "Please... please, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry, mom. Please... I'll be better just wake up and I'll never leave again." Santana slapped her hand against her mom's body, futily trying to wake her. "WAKE UP!" she screamed, her tears falling freely as she continued to slam her broken hand into her mom's side, the slaps turning to punches. "Wake up, you can't do this! Wake up!"

Sue sighed softly, walking into the room, broken glass crunching underfoot and wrapping her arms around Santana's waist, pulling her away. "Stop, S. Just stop. She's gone. There's nothing any of us can do."

"She always wakes up!" she called out as she was pulled away. She broke free again and hit her mom with her cast again. "I hate you! I hate you, you fucking bitch! You just _leave_ me? After... after everything you made me do? After all of this you just... you leave? You leave me all alone?!" she screamed at her mother's body.

After a few minutes of sobbing, Santana turned stoic. Her face went rock solid and she wobbled out of the room. She went into her childhood bedroom, and she grabbed the bottle of vodka laying on the floor. She opened it and dumped it on her bed, she went over to her desk and grabbed a book of matches and lit one. In a matter of seconds the bed was in flames, she walked out and grabbed another bottle. She did the same thing in the living room, going into the kitchen and turned the gas burner on without engaging the electric ignition before heading back to her mom's room. She looked at Sue and said only one word.

"Leave."

When Sue got her first whiff of the acrid smoke beginning to haze the air, she quickly left the room to see what was happening. While Sue was gone, Santana doused the bed in booze and looked at her mom one last time, body covered in bruises and needle tracks, legs opened and the ravaged remains of her core still caked with dried seminal fluids.

"Fuck you," she whispered as she lit the match and set the bed ablaze. She walked out of the room only to be grabbed by Sue and dragged out of the burning house.

"What the hell are you thinking, you little firebug?" Sue growled, pushing Santana into the SUV and running around to jump in the other side and peel out away from the house. "You could set this whole neighborhood on fire!"

"Good," Santana said as she looked out the window. She was in severe pain but she couldn't focus on it. She had no one. No family anymore, and her mom had been lying dead in her bed for more than two days. She could have prevented that if she never went to the hospital, or just kept her mouth closed.

Her mom was dead and it was her fault.

* * *

Sue pulled back into her garage a little later and walked around to help Santana out of the car. When she didn't show any signs of helping, the older woman sighed and got her out with a bit of effort, carrying her inside. Putting her down on the bed, she stood and looked at her for a moment. "This is for the best. She was basically gone when I saw her to get your guardianship signed over to me. It's better for someone to go then linger at that point, S."

When Santana didn't respond, she sighed and walked out of the room. Picking up her phone, she hit the autodial for Quinn's cell. "Q? Sue. You need to come take care of your _friend_." She paused and shook her head as if Quinn could see her. "No. It's her mother. You should come. Don't worry about them, I'll handle it."

* * *

Nearly a half-hour and a series of almost frantic poundings on the door, Quinn was back in Sue's house, striding down the hall. "How is she? You let her go to her mom and she was...?" She shook her head. "Never mind."

Peeling off her coat and gloves as she came into Santana's room, she dropped them on the floor and crawled into bed behind Santana, wrapping her arms around her. "I'm here, San," she whispered, lightly kissing her shoulder. "You're not alone. I'm here..."

Santana was vacantly starring at the wall. She smelled of booze and fire and didn't even acknowledge Quinn coming in. She hadn't moved or said anything since they left her house, which - for all she knew - was still burning. She sighed a little when Quinn held her, her body finally relaxing in the presence of someone who cared for her.

Quinn just kept softly whispering to her that she wasn't alone, that things would be okay. She reached up and gently stroked her hair, softly kissing the corner of her jaw and her cheek in a hopeless attempt at comforting her. "I'll stay with you tonight if you want me too," she whispered. "You shouldn't be alone and I want to."

"Stay," Santana breathed out as she tried to control her tears. "Please," she whimpered before falling into body wracking sobs and gasping for air. "She died..."

"I know," she whispered, ignoring the smell of burnt fabric and alcohol in her friend's hair and pressing up against Santana's back. "Sue told me. I'm so sorry, San. I should have been there for you. I'm so so sorry you had to go through that without me."

She kept whispering to Santana and holding her close until both girls fell asleep.

Neither realized that Sue had kept watch on them the entire time, flicking off the light and shaking her head with a muttered "sloppy babies" as she headed off to her own room.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"Yesterday around three in the afternoon, a fire broke out in the community of Lima Heights Adjacent in a foreclosed home. No one was aware of the fire until the house was fully consumed. Despite firefighters' best efforts, the fire raged uncontrolled through part of the night and jumped to multiple buildings." The red headed desk anchor shuffled her papers in front of a graphic of a burning house and _Lima Heights Adjacent Burns_ in bold white letters.

"Investigators are not currently stating what the initial cause of the fire was, though inside sources believe that it to be a case of arson. So far, there appears to have been one death relating to the fire - a woman found severely burned past the point of recognition in a bed in one of the initial house. They are not currently releasing any details on this death or the fire, though we will certainly keep you updated as events unfold. Until then, this is Andrea Carmichael for WOHN. And back to Rod. Rod?"

"Thank you, Andrea. Tragic story, just tragic." He turned to smile brightly at the camera, "Tonight in sports..."

* * *

Santana lay still watching the five o'clock news silently. She was on her stomach with her face smooshed into the rough leather of the couch, exactly where Sue left her several hours earlier when she ordered her to leave her room. Santana had yet to say anything to anyone but the few words she'd managed to Quinn the previous night. After Quinn left, she went mute, only opening her mouth to take her medications and to be force fed protein shakes.

Over the newscast, clips of the fire played, the entire house being engulfed in flames and firefighters trying to put it out. She watched her handiwork with no emotion. She watched the body bag rolling out of her home with no emotion. She heard Sue yelling at the maid as she got home and she blinked before getting up and moving to the room she had been designated clutching the stuffed lamb in her hand.

* * *

"Hi, Imelda," Quinn murmured with a sad smile for the friendly housekeeper as she opened the door. "Is she any better?"

The woman shook her head. "No, Miss Quinn, I'm afraid she's not. She's in her room now if you want to go see her."

"Thanks," she whispered, slipping into the house and down the hall to Santana's temporary room. Knocking softly, she peeked into the room. "Hey, San."

Santana waved her fingers slightly as she looked at the door blankly. She had the lamb clutched between her hands, her lips wrapped gently around the tip of its ear, sucking on it.

Quinn hated seeing her like that. Moving slowly, she came into the room. "Do you want me to sit with you for a while?"

The darker girl nodded slowly and shifted over slightly to let Quinn come and sit on the front of her. She watched carefully as Quinn moved into the room and closer to the bed.

Quinn sat carefully on the edge of the bed, moving so that Santana could put her head in her lap if she wanted to. She gently stroked her fingers over tangled dark hair. "I can't stay for long, Daddy's been on a rampage about something or another and he'll flip if I stay out too long, but I wanted to see you."

Santana slid over so her head rested in Quinn's lap and closed her eyes. She breathed softly as Quinn ran her fingers through her hair. She hadn't been able to sleep. She was so tired, but every time she closed her eyes she saw her mom or remembered getting attacked. She brought the toy up and held it against Quinn so it would soak up some more of the familiar scent she had become dependent on.

Quinn smiled softly, reaching up with her free hand to gently stroke the lamb, accidentally rubbing a little of the lotion she used into its wool. "Is Mr. Lamb taking good care of you, San? He better be or he's going to hear for me." She leaned down to place a tiny kiss against her friend's temple.

Santana sighed and nodded. Tears slipped out of her eyes as she listened to her friend speak softly to her. She turned her head and tried to mask her crying as just needing to be closer, nuzzling into the girl's stomach. Her body rocked slightly with barely concealed sobs. She hated feeling like this but she couldn't break out of it. Her body was _broken_ and everything hurt on top of the fact her mother was _dead_.

Quinn just held her, rocking gently and praying that somehow Santana would make it through this.

* * *

It'd been a long day.

She'd practically worn herself out trying to keep up with the demanding practice Sue had insisted on running them through and then to top it all off she hadn't even had time to stop by and see Santana before she had to go home. It may have been nearly a month since her mom had died, but Santana still wasn't speaking. It hurt Quinn to see her so despondent, but she felt that if she didn't at least try to visit her, no one would and that hurt even more. Even Brittany didn't seem concerned about her extended absence.

So, tired, aching, and irritated, she dragged herself into the house. Only to be greeted with the sight of a stack of boxes in the living room and what looked suspiciously like her suitcase propped up against them.

"What's going on?" she asked, confused, her gym bag sliding off her shoulder to thump against the hardwood floor. "Did someone order something?"

"Yes." She heard the swirl and clink of ice against glass behind her almost before she recognized her father's voice, turning just in time to see him take a drink of amber liquid, glaring at her over the rim. "As a matter of fact, I did."

"Oh, really?" Quinn did her best to look interested, but all she really wanted was to drag herself upstairs and take a hot shower.

"Yes, _really_." The glass, now empty, rapped harshly against the hardwood end table he was standing by. "I knew this would be necessary someday. The way you kept hanging out with that... that _slut_." His lips curled into a snarl. "Now her whole damn neighborhood is going up in flames and people are _dying_ and you _still_ won't stop associating with her!"

Quinn took a step back, eyes wide in shock. "You... you mean _Santana_? Daddy, what's wrong? None of that is her fault. Why are you so angry? I don't understand..."

"She's a _slut_, Quinn. Nothing but a dirty little _whore_ and no daughter of _mine_ is going to associate with such _trash_ anymore. Do you understand me?!" He was so close she could smell the whiskey on his breath, feel the flecks of spittle splatter against her cheek.

"But, Daddy," Quinn whispered, cowering back from the bigger man, "she's my _friend_..."

"Friend? Hmph. She's just using you." Russell sneered and turned away. "That doesn't matter anyway. We're leaving in a few hours."

Quinn was shocked, she reached out for her father, begging him silently to make this stop happening. "What...? Where?"

"Vermont. You'll be living with your Aunt Rebecca in Goshen from now on. More than seven hundred miles should be enough to keep you away from that bad influence you call a friend."

"I... I don't understand." All she could think about was how much Santana needed her, how she couldn't go away and leave her. "You... you _can't_ do this..."

"I can and I am, young lady." He snatched up his glass again. "Now go upstairs and finish packing. We leave at ten and you had _better_ be here or it will go _much_ worse for you."

* * *

Santana lay on the floor of Sue's house enduring her physical therapy. Her hips seemed to be hurting more and more everyday and Sue had decided to up the intake of the sessions. She wanted to scream but nothing seemed to come out as she struggled to get through the pain.

"_Focus_!" Sue barked, her hand hovering just under Santana's heel as she guided her through the straight leg raise, "You can do this. You're not some pathetic weakling like the rest. You're a _warrior_, one of my _elite_. Now show some _fight_, dammit!"

She likely would have continued in the same vein if the phone hadn't rang. Imelda answered it, but quickly brought over anyway. Sue huffed and let Santana relax back onto the floor, snatching the phone out of her housekeeper's hand. "This had better be good," she growled into the receiver.

"Q?" She stood and turned away from Santana, "What's going on? What? No, I haven't heard anything of the sort. She's fine. Of course she can stay here as long as she needs. I said that, didn't I? Report, soldier! What is _going on_? That is not an acceptable answer! Q! Q! Dammit." She pulled the phone away from her ear and glared at it. "Damn teenagers. Nothing but trouble."

Santana picked her tired head up and looked worried. "Q?" she mumbled as she looked to the older woman.

If Sue was surprised to hear Santana speak for the first time in weeks, she didn't show it. She only frowned and shook her head. "I have no idea. She calls in tears, babbling about you having a place to stay or something or other and then hangs up on me. Me! She had better not think she will be getting away with such impertinence!"

Santana was worried and nodded before getting up and hobbling to her room. She had grabbed the phone on her way by and quickly dialed Quinn's home number.

* * *

Russell answered the phone on the third ring. "Fabray Residence. Russell speaking. Can I help you?" He waited through the silence for nearly a minute before his patience started fraying. "Look, I don't know who you think you are, but if you don't talk _now_, I'm hanging up!" Another minute of silence. "I can hear you breathing, you sick freak! Don't call here again!" He slammed the phone down, making it jump out of it's cradle.

"Who was that, dear?" Judy asked, swaying slightly as she came out of the kitchen.

"Nothing. Just some freak. You should get cleaned up and packed. We have to leave soon."

* * *

Something was wrong.

Santana knew it. She grabbed her crutches and silently slipped out of Sue's house as best she could. It took nearly an hour for the small broken girl to hobble her way to the Fabray house. When she finally got there, she leaned the crutches against the house and used her good arm to pull herself up the tree. The window was locked when she got up to it, so she tapped her knuckles against it trying to get Quinn's attention.

Quinn was sitting on her stripped bed, her room bare of everything except for a single bag of clothes. She looked up upon hearing the tap, looking broken and lost, tears streaking her cheeks. When she saw Santana hanging in the tree, she scrambled across the room, unlocking the window and throwing it open. "Santana, what are you _doing_?" She reached out and helped her into the room. "You could get hurt even more out there. What if you fell?"

Santana hugged the blonde as she looked around the room. She pulled back and wiped her tears with her thumb. She looked at her and pressed her head to Quinn's. "Didn't answer the phone," she whispered.

"San," Quinn breathed, hugging her and helping her sit down and take the weight off her hips, "you _spoke_." After a moment though, her happiness from that faded and she took in a shaky breath. "You shouldn't be here. I... I have to leave soon. He's making me _leave_..."

"Leave?" she whispered, then shook her head and tightened her arms around the blond. "No," she whispered a tear falling down her face. "Can I come?"

Quinn shook her head, tears starting to fall down her face again. "No... I want you to, but he won't let you. I'm sorry, San. I'm so sorry. I never wanted to break my promise." She buried her face in Santana's hair. "I'm so sorry."

"Were... you gonna leave and not say bye?" she whimpered, pulling away and furiously wiping her tears. "I'll go," she sniffled thinking she was being abandoned again.

"No! Santana," her voice cracked as she reached for her friend, "I only just found out! He said we leave at ten. They packed all my things..." Her face crumpled. "I don't want to leave, San. I don't want to go to Vermont and live with my aunt on her farm..."

"We can go... run away!" she exclaimed. "Don't leave me, Q," she begged as she clutched her friend's hand. She pulled the blonde towards the window. "We can go now."

Quinn didn't move from the bed. Her shoulders slumped and she could barely raise her head enough to look at Santana. "Go _where_, San?" She sounded defeated. "I can't take care of you when you're hurt like this and how will we live? I don't ever, _ever_ want you to have to do what you've been doing. I don't want to leave. I never want to leave you. Ever, San. But I don't have any _choice_ right now."

Santana's hand fell and she looked to the ground. "Fine," she whispered, giving up as she heard Russell yelling at Judy. "Don't forget me."

"I _couldn't_!" Quinn cried, finally standing up and pulling Santana into a tight hug. "You're my _best friend_, Santana. My _only_ friend. I could _never_ forget you. I'll come back. I promise. As soon as I can. I'll come back and we'll leave. Together. I _promise_. Please don't give up on me, San. You're the only one who ever believed in me."

"Okay," she said again as she felt her heart breaking. "_Te amo_," she whispered against Quinn's neck.

Hearing the sounds of Russell coming up the stairs, she urged Santana back into the closet. "Don't try going out the window, you'll get hurt. Just wait until we're gone. I'll come back for you, Santana. I promise I won't leave you here. I'll come back, I will." She pressed a piece of paper into Santana's hand. "That's my aunt's address in Vermont. Write me when you can. Please, _please_ don't forget me."

Santana nodded before surging forward to press a lingering kiss to a startled Quinn's lips. She didn't know what - or why - she was doing, she just knew that it was the only thing that she wanted to do. She was losing the last person that meant anything to her and she was beside herself with the pain. Santana pulled away and hid in the back of the closet trying to hold back her tears as she heard Russell come into the room.

Quinn stepped back from the closet with her fingers lightly brushing over her lips and an expression of shock on her face that fell into even greater remorse as she realized she wouldn't have a chance to ask Santana why she'd done that. To talk to her about what it meant. _If_ it meant anything.

To ever actually _talk_ to her best friend again.

Her eyes welling up with fresh tears, she fought to push down the pain gripping her heart and hide her tears behind the stoic mask she'd spent years developing. She spun away from the closet with one last look into the depths at Santana - etching the way she looked into her mind - and snatched up her bag just as Russell was coming in the door.

"You better be ready," he growled, glowering fiercely as he pushed into the room.

Quinn sneered, trying to hide how hurt she was to leave everything she'd ever known on his say so behind anger. "What does it matter if I am or not? It's not like I have _ever_ had any say in things in this household."

He grabbed her arm, yanking her off balance. "You watch your mouth or I'll show you _just_ how little say you have."

He pulled her out of the room and down the stairs, pushing her outside to the car where he'd already shoved her boxes into the back in preparation for the long drive to Vermont. Quinn could only look back at the house as they drove away, seeing not the formal white columns or the elegant brickwork, but the scared, broken girl hiding in her closet who'd given her the first kiss that might have actually meant anything in her life. She wished more than anything in that moment that she had _real_ parents, ones who actually _cared_ about her so she could cry at how much she was losing.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: CAUTION: This chapter involves hitchhiking and very unpleasant situations for young girls attempting this sort of activity. Hitchhiking is a dangerous method of travel and neither Maura nor I encourage anyone to place themselves into this situation if they have any other options. We also want to be very clear that we are in no way trying to put shame on any particular company or reflect upon their normal drivers. - Sio**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

Santana hobbled back to Sue's house after the Fabray's left and ignored the coach's screaming at her for running away - and more screaming when she ignored her. She went into her assigned room, laying on the bed and sobbed. It took more the 24 hours until she could stop crying and could even begin to think of a plan.

As she could see it, she had three choices. Choice one: stay in Lima. Choice two: run away. Or choice three: kill herself. She had promised Quinn that she wouldn't kill herself even though she woke up wanting to for the better part of the last three years, so that ruled out option three. And she knew that staying in Lima would only make it worse.

Which left only one choice.

She opened the hand that clutched the new address of her best friend. She didn't care now. She needed to protect Quinn and get her out of wherever Russell sent her. So she got up carefully and showered. She pulled out two track suits that were in Sue's retired clothing area and shoved them in her bag. She slipped on a pair of leggings then the pair of baggy jeans Quinn had gotten her.

She pulled her bag onto the bed and grabbed the pack of white t-shirts Sue's maid had picked up for her and put them in as well. She slid on Quinn's Cheerio sweatshirt and the shoes that she gave to her when she got out of the hospital and looked around the room. She wrote _thank you_ on a piece of paper before carefully hoisting herself out the window.

Despite the agonizing pain in her hips with each step, Santana slowly walked through the night heading towards the closest highway.

* * *

The truck stop was a glimmer of light on the horizon when she reached the highway. Four hours later, she was exhausted and in significant pain, but finally dragging her aching body into the bright fluorescent lights beating down on the cracked, oil and gas stained tarmac. The loud blare of a truck horn startled her as a big rig blew past her, the massive vehicle trundling across the lot to the overnight parking.

Santana lay down on a bench and closed her eyes for a few moments. She groaned as she felt the cold run through her body during the pre-dawn chill. Several snow flakes landed on her face while she rested.

"Frank?" The voice was soft, deep and husky but caring, "Frank, look at her, she must be freezing. She looks about Carrie's age..."

There was a sigh, then a tired but indulgent voice chuckled. "Well, go on then, Georgie. You know you wanna mother the little lost chick, so do your thing, woman."

A little bit after that, a warm hand closed around her shoulder, shaking gently. "Sweetie?" It was the woman's voice, Georgie. "Sweetheart, open your eyes now. Come on, pretty girl, open your eyes for ol' Georgie. I got a nice hot cup of coffee here for you if you'll just open them and have us a nice sit up."

Santana jumped up, her body seizing as she moved too quickly for her own good. She whimpered and held her stomach. She looked at the woman frightened and shivering. "I-I don't have anything," she whispered, thinking she was getting robbed. "I was... I just fell asleep."

If the heavily built woman was surprised by Santana's jump, she didn't show it, though the small, lean man behind her certainly raised a curious brow. "Yes, I can certainly see that, my dear." She held out the steaming paper cup in her hand. "Here, take a drink of this. I promise it's safe, just coffee. From the diner just over there." She nodded at the brightly lit if a bit dingy truck stop diner.

"It's freezing out here, little miss. A little slip of a thing like you could right well freeze to death out here. Or worse," the man crossed himself, sending up a brief prayer that it never happened, "some far more unkind soul could come across you and do you an ungentle mischief. Are you in some kind of trouble?"

"No, sir," Santana said as she look the cup with her non-casted hand and kept her head down to avoid them seeing the bruises that still marred her skin. "Just going home..." She sniffled as she sipped the coffee and tried to ignore the throbbing in her lower body.

"Poor thing." Georgie gently brushed her hair back, "You look like you've had a hard time getting this far. Where's home? Maybe we could help you get some of the way there at least."

Santana quickly looked down to the slip of paper crumpled up and half sticking out of her cast. "Um. Vermont," she mumbled as she clutched the coffee and tried to find a way to sit so her hips weren't taking as much weight.

"Well, we're just stopping in for some breakfast and joe before hitting the road for Virginia with me spelling Georgie here at the wheel." Frank smiled reassuringly at her. "If you like, you're plenty welcome to join us for the meal and maybe we can take you on towards the coast and you can find someone heading further north a bit further on."

"I...I don't..." She coughed slightly into her elbow. "I don't have anything... no money... I couldn't," she said mildly ashamed that she thought she could get to Quinn without money. She rubbed her cold nose and looked up at them through her red eyes and tear stained face. "I don't... have anything to give you for a ride."

"That's okay, sweetie. We get paid enough to drive as it is. You don't need to offer anything but your company." Georgie patted Santana's cheek and straightened up. "The Good Book tells us to be kind to others and this is just the sort of kindness we'd want done to our little girl if she were ever in the sort of state you're in, sweetheart." She held her hand out to Santana with a kind smile. "Come on now, I hear a plate of silver dollars and bacon calling my name, don't you?"

Santana looked up at the mention of the Bible. "You... go to church?" she asked as she stood up slowly whimpering as her pelvis cracked. "My dad used to take me," she said softly as she followed behind the couple. She hobbled along slowly with them as she tried to weigh the pros and cons. Pro, she got a free meal and maybe a ride. Con, she got kidnapped and killed. At this point, she was more than willing to take the risk.

"Well, we don't always have the opportunity to go in to hear the Good Word, but we are certainly God-fearing and take the word of the Good Book seriously. The Lord tells us to love our neighbors and help those with less than us, and by God," Frank smiled over his shoulder at her, reaching out and gently tapping his wife's wrist to encourage her to slow her pace so Santana could keep up, "I reckon it's a right finer way to live my life than sticking my head in the ground and trying to ignore those who might just be cryin' out for my help. Now," he held the door open, "don't you worry none about the tab. It's my pleasure as a gentleman to be able to purchase a meal for two lovely ladies such as yourself and my Georgie."

Santana blushed furiously at the compliment. No one had never called her a lady let alone lovely before and she wasn't sure how to take it. She went into the harsh fluorescent lights and followed behind the rotund woman until they sat at a table. Santana hesitated before taking down her hood, knowing that the skin of her face was still slightly green and yellow and the purple bruises wrapping around her neck had yet to fade. She looked down at her hands and her dirty cast and sighed. She didn't know what to say. She had spent over a month ignoring the world and now she couldn't remember how to be around people anymore. She was broken, heartbroken and all alone. She didn't know if when she got to Vermont she could find Quinn, let alone convince her to leave with her.

Taking one look at the bruises on her face and neck, Frank whispered in Georgie's ear to have a seat and order and he'd be right back before kissing her gently and striding off to the store side of the stop. Georgie slid into the seat of a booth, nodding at Santana to take the other side before waving the waitress over and ordering a pot of coffee and two pancake specials with extra bacon.

"Not the healthiest, I know," Georgie offered a conspiratorial grin across the table, "but I do love crispy bacon and maple syrup. Go ahead, dear. You order whatever you want. You look about half starved and I've a mind to feed you up."

The girl looked at the menu knowing that she couldn't stomach much. "Oatmeal," she said softly. "With apple juice?" she asked the waitress and watched as she went away. Santana pulled the sweatshirt up around her neck so she could hide a bit more. She went into her bag and found her medications and took the several pills out and held them in her hand to prepare to take them.

Frank came back to the table with a small bag in his hand. He slid into the booth to kiss his wife and slide the bag across the table to Santana. "Now, normally I don't advocate taking medications, but between that cast and those bruises, you certainly look like you could use a little extra help." He nodded at the bag containing a container of bruise cream and a bottle of Advil. "I know it ain't much and that there cream is labeled for diabetics, but it works something fierce. You look like you got knocked about pretty hard."

Georgie rolled her eyes. "How tactful, Frank. Sweetie, don't you listen to him. He's just a dim man who hasn't quite learned when to not open his yap." But she smiled fondly at him as he said it and the man just shrugged comically and leaned back in his seat with a grin. "Now, how about introductions if we're going to be road-mates for a bit. My name's Georgia, but everyone calls me Georgie and this is my husband Frank."

"Thank you," she whispered as she took the bag and put the medications she had to take on a napkin and sipped at the coffee the waitress brought her. She looked at the cream and the pills, unsure what to think. She had been in extreme pain for months and bruised for so long she had begin to think she was never going to look normal again. "Leila... I mean, Santana." She cleared her throat as she forgot her real name for a moment. "Santana."

"That's a lovely name." Georgie smiled warmly, ignoring the momentary slip. "I have a little girl myself." She nudged her husband. "Frank, show her the picture our Carrie sent last week. Show her, show her!" She smiled proudly at Santana. "She's a sophomore at Georgia Tech. She going to be an engineer. I'm so proud of our little girl."

Frank finally dug his wallet out and flipped it open to a picture of a slightly husky but pretty girl with dark hair like Georgie and a bright smile - that could only have come from the proud father beaming down at his little girl - wearing safety glasses and waving at the camera. "That's who we drive for." He sounded a bit gruff as he added, "Who I cleaned up my act for. She's such a good girl."

Santana smiled and nodded, mildly jealous that no one ever talked about her like that - and that no one likely ever would. That her parents didn't _clean up their act_ for her. "You're proud," she noted as she looked at their faces. "That's nice." She smiled fakely. When the food came, Santana was relieved and she took her pills one at a time as the couple tucked into their food.

"I'm sure whoever's waiting for you up in Vermont is just as proud," Frank muttered around a bite of pancakes, nodding his chin at her. "I mean, sure stuff's hard now, but if they weren't worth it, you wouldn't be going to all this trouble, right?"

"I have nothing else." She shrugged as she finished her last pill. "I don't even know if I'll find her," she whispered and looked down at the oatmeal, "I just couldn't stay... I'll just start over now."

* * *

Frank paid their tab, getting a set of peanut butter and jellies and BLTs to go as Georgie crouched beside the booth and carefully slid Santana out and into her arms. The girl had fallen asleep almost mid-bite, and she looked so tired that frankly neither of the truckers were surprised. Cradling her surprisingly light body against her chest - her bag dangling loosely from one elbow - she waited for her husband to get the food before following him out to the truck, their feet crunching in the light dusting of snow covering the lot.

When they reached their big purple Kenworth, it took a bit more shuffling to get the door unlocked and Santana and her bag passed up to a careful Frank who climbed in first. He carried her back into the sleeper, settling her onto the double bed and pulling the blanket folded up at her feet up around her shoulders, patting them gently before heading up to buckle himself into the driver's seat as Georgie settled into the passenger seat. She smiled at him, reaching over to hold his hand for a moment of prayer for the lost little girl in their sleeper to find who she was looking for.

"Let's get rolling," she murmured, nodding at the lightening sky.

Frank nodded and started the rig, putting it into gear and rolling them out on the start of their renewed trip to Virginia.

* * *

Santana slept fitfully, stirring slightly to cry out from a nightmare or to whimper in pain. It wasn't until several hours later into the ride however that the small girl woke up wrapped in a warm blanket, on a bed, and warm. She sat up slowly trying to remember where she was. She furrowed her brows as she realized she was in a moving vehicle and looked up through the curtain at the two drivers.

By this point, Georgie was driving the rig again, Frank napping in the passenger chair. She glanced back over her shoulder for a second at the sound of rustling. "Well, hello there, Santana. Did you sleep well?"

She reached up to push back her mess of black hair as she looked confused for a moment as she looked around the cab. She vaguely remembered falling asleep in the snow and meeting the truckers, but she couldn't remember going into their cab.

"Where we going?" She groaned, as she moved to stretch out her back and hips. She whimpered and flexed her fingers on her broken hand and sighed. She always hoped she'd feel better in the morning, but she never did.

"We're close about an hour outside Charleston, West Virginia, now." Georgie tapped the screen on the GPS mounted to the roof of the cab. "Call it another four hours to Charlottesville. You hungry?"

"No ma'am," Santana said softly as she moved slightly to look out the window. She looked at the scenery as they drove by. Santana had never been out of Ohio. She had been to Akron once when she was thirteen and her mom sent her with a man for a weekend, but she didn't see anything but his trailer. "I've never been out of Ohio," she said softly as she looked around.

Georgie chuckled. "Well, you're certainly out now. Come switch places with Frank here before he gets a nasty crick in his neck and take a gander why don't you? Frank." She reached over and nudged him awake without taking her eyes off the road. "Frank, wake up and go to bed, you fool man."

"Huh? What?" He sat up, rubbing his eyes blearily. "What's going on?"

"Switch places with our guest so she can see while you're sawing logs. Man snores like a chainsaw in that bed, Santana," she added as an aside as he unbuckled and carefully got up out of his chair to shuffle back in the swaying cab.

"Need a hand up there, pretty lady?" He smiled sleepily, offering his hand to help if she needed it.

The small girl moved with his help to the front seat when Frank moved to the back. She left the blanket on the bed, picking up her bag and pulling on one of the over-sized track jackets. She carefully moved to sit in the passenger seat, wincing at the painful twinge from her hips as she did so. Once she was as comfortable as she could get, she looked out the window. "It's pretty," she said as she looked at the trees. "Do you drive this way a lot?"

"Enough." Georgie smiled at Santana, listening to the sound of her husband getting situated in the bunk. "Frank and me, we do coast to coast runs. With a two person team, we can drive a lot of our solo competition into the ground and old Betsy here," she patted the dash, "hasn't let us down yet. After we drop this load, we'll be picking up another down in Richmond and heading back to the west to drop it in California."

Santana nodded and looked out the window. She sighed, being around seemingly normal people was making her depression worse. She wiped a stray tear away as she listened and tried to keep her thoughts away from her mother.

"That's cool," she whispered, her voice faltering. "Your daughter must like seeing you..."

"Oh, when she's got time. She's gonna be better than the both of us." The woman nodded as she smiled, looking out the window at the road. "That's the job of kids, you know. Being better than their folks. Do you see yours often?" She glanced over at Santana, catching sight of a tear streaking down a tanned cheek. "Oh, sweetie, what's wrong?"

"I don't have parents." She shrugged. "My mom died." She tried to not let it bother her as she continued looking out the window. "I'm no better than my parents. I don't think that's even a possibility now."

"I'm so sorry to hear that, dear." Georgie reached over and gently squeezed her shoulder. "She's in a better place now, I've no doubt. But you're better than them, I'm certain of it. But if you don't have any parents, who are you going to see? An aunt or uncle? Maybe grandparents? If you don't mind me asking, of course."

"I doubt it." She swallowed and played with her hands. "I'm Catholic... Biblically speaking she's not in a better place." She sniffled remembering seeing her mom dead, then remembering how she set her house on fire. "I just needed to leave," she said simply. "I had a friend who moved to Vermont and I want to find her," she whispered. She didn't have anyone else. She needed to find Quinn like she needed air to breathe. "I.. I just need to find her."

Georgie nodded. "I can certainly understand that. And the Good Book says our Lord forgives most any trespass done on this good Earth. She must be a terrible good friend of yours to need to find her so bad."

"He won't forgive her," Santana said quickly. "Not... not my mom." She licked her lip and sighed before looking up. "She's my only friend. Her... her parents hate me and moved her away when they found out... when my mom died, they took her away."

"Well, that's terrible!" Georgie glanced over at her, shocked. "What sort of parents do ya'll have where you come from? Doing things so awful your own kids condemn you to burn and tearing a girl away from her best friend just because you don't like the friend? That's just not right!"

"Hers... hers drink and my dad went to jail for drugs and my mother was a hooker..." She sighed, sad because she finally admitted to someone who wasn't Quinn what her family was like. "My... my mom died from an overdose when I was in the hospital for getting ra- hit by a car," she said, Sue's lie easier than the truth. "You don't come from good people if you have to run away at fifteen just to stay alive."

"Sweetheart," Georgie took her eyes off the road to glance at Santana and give her another gentle arm squeeze, "just because you don't come from good people doesn't mean you're not or can't be good people yourself. Frank and I, we don't come from good people. His daddy's plumb meaner than a polecat in Tabasco sauce and'll sooner beat you half to death than look at you twice. My mother, may the dear Lord rest her soul, brought ten kids into this world by eight different daddies and she didn't think twice of it. I don't even know my daddy." She shrugged. "But we like to think we're better than that. Better than them. And if we do it because we want to prove we're not like where we came from, then that's as good a motivation as any, don't you think?"

"You don't want to know why I'm not a good person," she said coldly. "Goes beyond hatred to the dicks that brought me into the world just to use me. It doesn't matter anymore. She died fucking happy, getting fucked and being high off her ass," Santana said bitterly as she tried to fold into herself. "I'm gonna find Q and we're gonna run away and I'll take care of her. I'll save us no matter what. I have to."

Georgie just nodded. "You do what you feel you have to, Santana. Now you might not be hungry, but I could use a sandwich. Want to grab one from that box there?" She nodded at the box between them. "We got PB&Js and BLTs from the diner where we picked you up. You're welcome to take your pick."

Santana carefully leaned over and picked up the sandwich from the box. She handed a BLT to the woman and picked up a PB&J for herself. She nibbled slowly on a corner. She stayed silent for another twenty minutes before she looked down and wrapped the rest of the sandwich up and slid it into her bag. She sighed and rested her head on the window. "I... thank you for taking me this far..."

"It's no problem and I can't say the company wasn't pleasant," Georgie smiled at her after swallowing a bite of her sandwich, "but you're welcome all the same."

* * *

A few hours later, the destination arrived. They pulled into the truck stop and Santana looked out at the unfamiliar place. She was scared, she didn't know how to get to Vermont but she knew she _had_ to. She got out of the cab with the help of Georgie and pulled her jacket tighter around her form.

"Thank you," she whispered again as she looked at the couple. "Just, thank you."

The large woman pulled Santana into a tight hug. "Any time, Santana. And I certainly mean that."

Frank opted to just offer his hand for a shake, not as into hugs as his wife. "You best be sure to wave if you ever see old Betsy here on the Interstate. We'll keep an eye out for you, alright?"

The girl nodded before pulling her bag onto her shoulders and smiling. She turned away and brushed off the tears that threatened to fall as she hobbled along. She ducked into the bathroom at the rest stop, washing herself as best she could and tried to make herself look somewhat presentable to get into the next person's car. She changed into one of the track suit pants and a white t-shirt. She folded her jeans in her bag smiling sadly when she saw two sandwiches and a note in her stuff.

_God bless you and good luck finding your friend._

Santana tucked the note into her wallet and sighed before heading out to find her next ride.

* * *

Gordon Sherman tended to sit by himself, hunched over his food like he was afraid someone would take it - when he deigned to eat in the diner. Most of the other drivers were willing to let him too, driven off by his general unpleasant attitude. Most of the male drivers just disliked him, but the women on his route actively loathed him.

His hair was scruffy, though generally kept more or less short, and he didn't bother to keep himself clean shaven on the best days. When Santana walked into the diner though, he smiled, rolling the well-chewed toothpick between his lips. He liked hitchhikers. They _needed_ something. And people who needed things were usually opened to _bargaining_ and, his favorite, _trading_.

It didn't take long to realize she was looking for a truck heading to Vermont. He smirked to himself as he finished his meatloaf sandwich. He was the only truck going even close - headed to the Wal-Mart in Kingston, New York - and he knew it.

Pushing his plate aside, he tossed down a ten and sauntered over to her, tugging on the brim of his battered Wal-Mart hat. "Well, now, little miss, I might just be able to help you." He smiled as charmingly as he could.

Santana looked up, her body shivered as he looked over her. She didn't like him. She didn't like him at all. "I need to go to Vermont..." She swallowed as his hands came up to touch her shoulder.

"I heard. And I ain't going to Vermont, but I _am_ going to Kingston in upstate New York. I can give you a ride that far if you want." He tucked his hands in his back pockets, leaning back, pleased with himself for cleaning out the cab that weekend.

She was weary, but desperate. "Um. Is that close?" she asked naively.

He shrugged. "Couple hours give or take south of Vermont. Depends on where you want to go _in_ Vermont just how close Kingston is to it."

"Oh," she said and looked down at the paper, having no idea where she was heading. "I guess close is better than nothing. You can take me?"

"Oh I can _definitely_ take you, but I got a load to drop in Kingston. There's a stop near there I can drop you at. Bet you could find some family or something heading up into Vermont from there take you the rest of the way." He tongued at his teeth, watching her with an amused smile. She was a bit beat up, but he didn't mind. Wasn't much interested in her _body_ anyway.

"Okay," she replied, looking up with a forced smile. She picked up her bag and tried to not limp too much as she followed him to the truck. He went and got in on his side leaving her to struggle one handed into the giant machine. Once inside, she carefully sat and put her bag on the floor between her feet.

He strapped in and started the truck, giving her an oily smile before pulling out of the lot. "Well, here we go, little lady."

* * *

It had been a quiet couple of hours Santana looked out the window while _he_ drove. She needed to take pain medications but she didn't have any water. Regretfully, she popped one in her mouth and dry swallowed it, trying not to choke on the bitter flavor. She simply leaned her head against the window and sighed.

He'd been watching her out of the corner of his eye as he drove. _Imagining_ what he could bargain for for this ride. He didn't even try to hide his oily smile or the soft laugh that broke out of him periodically under the static of the CB on his dash.

He knew what he wanted. Now it was just a matter of discussion to actually _get_ what he wanted. Just thinking about bargaining for his satisfaction made his cock swell, tenting his pants as he drove.

Santana cracked her neck and saw it, the unmistakable protrusion in his jeans. She swallowed. She didn't want to do this. She didn't want to have sex. She didn't even know if she _could_ have sex with her pelvis still messed up. She kept her eyes forwards and tried to ignore what might come next.

"You know," he started, the first words he'd said to her in hours, licking his lips, "driving long hours like this is pretty stressful." He spread his legs with a suggestive nod. "I could use a little relaxation, if you know what I mean."

"I don't know what you mean," Santana said, not looking over at him. She didn't want to break her promise to Quinn. She didn't want to do this.

He rolled his eyes. "Look, you're a hitcher, you can't be this naive."

"I'm just a kid," she whispered. She was blatantly lying, but he was gross and she didn't want to break her promise to Quinn.

"And you're a hitcher, you know how these things work." He huffed, shaking his head. "Fuck, I just want you to blow me, kid! It ain't like I'm asking you to _fuck_ me or threatening to chop you up and toss you in a ravine somewhere. I just want a little head."

Santana struggled with her conscious. "Okay," she finally whispered. She looked at her hands then she reached down in her bag and popped a mint into her mouth before unbuckling her seat belt.

"That's the ticket," he smirked, reaching down with one hand to undo his belt buckle and unzip his pants, "you just come on over and kneel beside me. Plenty of room to do your thing."

"Take it out please," she said as she struggled to move over to him. Her hips hurt to sit next to him and she looked up. She didn't want to touch him at all.

He chuckled. "Make me do all the work why, don't you?" But his hand slid into his pants and pulled out his four inch member. "It's a beauty, isn't it." His hand fisted his dick and pumped a couple of times before pulling away, leaving it bobbing with the motion of the cab. "I like getting off while I'm driving, but I love it when I got me a hitcher to help."

The small girl looked at the erect penis in front of her and nodded. She leaned over him and stroked her hand over the skin. She closed her eyes and tried to go to a better place as she touched him. She pulled her hand away and spit in it before she returned back to what she was doing.

He grunted, thrusting slightly into her hand, but soon groaned. "Aww, now, I can give myself a handjob, pretty thing. I know you ethnic chicks love white dick in your mouth, so get to sucking already!"

She looked up. "Don't call me ethnic," she said as she tugged his dick.

"Fine, whatever." He rolled his eyes, pushing his hips up. "Just get on with it, will you?"

Santana glared and moved to hover over him, her breath tickling his skin. She said a silent apology to Quinn in her head before her let her tongue slip out and lap over the tip. She acted on instinct. She couldn't remember how many blowjobs she'd given over the years, but every time she remembered how much she hated it. She opened her lips a bit more and took the tip into her mouth and sucked softly.

"Fuck, yeah," he groaned, leaning back to give her more room, his eyes bare slits as he watched the road while she sucked him. His free hand dropped down from the steering wheel to brush her hair, trembling to resist fisting after one of his hitchers bit him when he did.

The girl continued to run her tongue down his lackluster length and was momentarily relieved that he wasn't long enough to choke her by thrusting into her mouth. She hummed softly as she took him in her mouth totally before pulling out and using her hand to pump him.

"Aw, come _on_, girl," he groaned. "I don't want to make a mess in my damn seat, here," he muttered, trying to push her face back down towards his erection.

Her eyes flickered around and she was relieved when she saw an empty coffee cup on the floor. She picked it up with her hand and she went back to sucking on his tip. She rolled her tongue and sucked hard a few times trying to get it over with.

His head rolled back and his eyes almost closed as he came, spurting a bare mouthful of cum into her mouth. "Fuck! Yeah," he relaxed back into the seat, "oh yeah, that's the best way to relax when you're on the road."

Santana quickly pulled away and spat into the cup between her fingers. She coughed a few times trying to get everything out.

"Well geez, that's gratitude for ya." He snorted, tucking himself away and zipping up. "Can't complain though. You're pretty good at that. Never had anyone good as you, pretty girl." He leered over at her in a manner he probably intended as charming. "Tell you what. You give me another blowjob like that when we get to Kingston and I'll take you anywhere in Vermont you want."

"No," she said quickly. "I don't want to do that again." She picked up her bag and looked out the window popping several mints into her mouth.

He shrugged and turned his attention back to the road. "Alright. Your loss."

* * *

For what felt like the hundredth time, Santana was alone at a rest stop somewhere in upstate NY. She went into the bathroom and once again washed out her mouth then used the hand sanitizer to try and wash some of the grime off her body. She got dressed into a new t-shirt and her jeans hoping that soon she'd find Quinn.

When she came out, a young woman in a black tunic over a white dress with a white veil over her hair, a rosary attached to her belt, and a silver cross about her neck was standing patiently by the door. "Hello, miss," she smiled, "I'm terribly sorry to bother you, but I noticed you arriving with that dreadful man some time ago and I wished to ascertain as to your well-being."

Santana's eyes went wide. "I'm sorry, sister... I needed a ride from Virginia." She had already felt guilty enough, now a nun? She looked in the mirror before pulling her hood on to cover her neck bruises. "I'm fine."

"Oh, I have no doubt you were engaging the practice known colloquially as hitch-hiking." The novice's smile grew and she held out her hand. "I'm Sister Anna, by the way. If I may be so bold, may I ask what your final destination is?"

Santana reached her left hand out since her right was broken. "Santana," she said bashfully. "I'm going to Vermont. Or at least trying."

"Oh, what luck then!" Sister Anna shook her hand, beaming and letting go to clap delightedly. "We're currently on our way to the Monastery of Immaculate Heart of Mary in Westfield to join in the prayer services for a time. Where in Vermont are you headed? Perhaps my Sisters and I can be of assistance in helping you to arrive at your destination."

"Uh," she trailed off as she checked the paper tucked into her cast. "Goshen? This place," she held out the paper to the older woman. "Is that close?" Santana looked hopeful as she looked to the nun. She was just so worn out. She had been on the road for almost two days and Quinn had been gone for four. She was scared the longer it took that Quinn would forget her.

"Hmm," Sister Anna took the paper and studied it for a moment, before shrugging. "I'm not sure, but we can ask Sister Margret to look on the map." She looked up, glancing around. "There she is!" She waved at an older woman with a black covering over her veil. "Sister Margret!"

The older woman made her way over. "Sister Anna, please attempt to rein in your enthusiasm. What is it you need?"

Sister Anna handed over the piece of paper. "Santana here is trying to find her way to Goshen. You've driven this route before, right? Is it close?"

"Close?" Sister Margaret tilted her head back to peer at the paper through her bifocals. "I believe we drive right by the turn off for it." She frowned considering it. "I believe it's roughly midway to Westfield from here."

Santana looked up hopefully. "I... Do... I don't have anything to offer... But do you think I could ride with you?" She looked hesitant, but she needed to get to Quinn. "Please?"

Sister Margaret adjusted her glasses as she looked at Santana. "Miss, perhaps you've encountered some less than pleasant individuals on your journey, but we're nuns. It would hardly reflect well upon our order to demand compensation for assisting a young girl like yourself." She smiled softly, shaking her head. "You are certainly welcome to join us. Do you live in Goshen?"

"I don't live anywhere," she admitted, not allowing herself to lie to nuns of her faith. "I'm from Ohio... And I'm trying to get to a friend in Vermont."

Sister Anne placed a gentle hand upon her shoulder. "Then perhaps God has decided it is time for your dedication in attempting to reach your friend to be rewarded with some help. Are you Catholic perhaps? If so, maybe we could pray together."

"I was... I am. I'm not very good at it. My mom was, but I think my dad was Baptist. I'm Catholic," she said, knowing she was rambling but unable to help it. She picked up her bag with a wince, wanting nothing more than to be with people who wouldn't hurt her after the last driver.

"Are you harmed, child?" Another woman dressed similarly to Sister Margret but taller and leaner came over looking concerned. "I see the cast and the," she hissed softly in sympathy, "the bruises, but is there further damage as well?"

"Sister Agatha, this is Santana. We were just discussing assisting her in the final leg of her journey to her friend. She's homeless and has been hitch-hiking from Ohio," Sister Anne explained.

Sister Agatha raised a brow. "In such a state?" She shook her head. "The dear Lord must have laid a hand upon you, my child, to have made it so far. Forgive my saying so, but you look as though great evil has befallen you in your short life."

"Could say that, ma'am," Santana sighed, "but that is gone I hope and if I can get to Vermont everything might be okay." She sniffled. "My mom died and my dad's in jail and Quinn's all I have and she needs me now so I have to find her."

"You have suffered a great deal." Sister Agatha nodded. "Don't worry, child. We'll see you to your friend, won't we, Sisters?"

Sister Anne and Sister Margaret nodded. "Of course, we will," Sister Anne piped in.

"Well now. If you are prepared to leave, we can begin the journey to your Quinn as soon as we reach the van." Sister Agatha smiled benevolently at Santana, turning to pay for their gas.

Santana simply followed along and slid into the seat by the window. She rested her head and sighed as she thought about where she'd be soon.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Quinn had been disconsolate for days.

She'd barely spoken when the family had arrived at the farm house Aunt Rebecca shared with her best friend and business partner, Cindy Maganix. All she'd done after her father had made her help unpack her boxes from the car to the room that had been prepared for her was go into the room, close the door, and curl up on the bed. She hadn't reacted when Cindy had poked her head in the room to tell her her parents were leaving, just stayed just where she was - laying on her side with her back to the door, clutching her pillow to her chest.

It was worse when she finally managed to rouse herself enough to unpack her things. Everything that had connected her to Santana was gone, thrown out in a fit of pique by a drunken Russell. She'd torn through everything, frantically searching. She didn't even have a _picture_ of her best friend left. Even her middle school yearbooks had the pages with the younger girl's smiling face torn out.

Quinn had finally broken when she realized to just what lengths her father had been willing to go to remove Santana from her life. She'd sobbed brokenly for hours until she was too tired to move and had no more tears in her to cry, though her thin body continued to shiver with dry tears. Her aunt had come in then and sat behind her, gently rubbing her back and whispering that it would be okay.

"It won't," she mumbled, her voice thick with tears. "He made me break the only promise that mattered. She _needs_ me, Aunt Becca! She needs me and I _left_! He took _everything_!" Quinn rolled over and buried her face in her aunt's lap, clinging to the gentle woman. "I should have gone with her. I should have run away with her! How could I be such a horrible friend?!"

"You're not a bad friend, Quinn," she whispered, as she ran her fingers through the girl's hair. "You'll see her again. You gave her the address so hopefully she'll write you and maybe we can bring her here for the summer when she's done with school?" Rebecca didn't know Santana's past, she didn't know that Santana hadn't been to school in a long time or that the only reason she kept going was because of Quinn. All she wanted was for her niece to be okay. She wanted her to not hurt any more. "Come on, sweetness, let's get you some cocoa and food."

Quinn shook her head, not wanting to move. "You don't know. She won't be okay. Her mom's dead and," her breath caught in her throat, "and her dad's in prison and she's all _alone_ now! She's _hurt_ and alone and he made me _leave_! I promised her I wouldn't leave her!" She rolled to look up at her aunt, tears streaking her cheeks. "I _promised_, Aunt Becca. Doesn't that mean anything in this family?"

"She'll be okay, Quinnie," she whispered, pressing a kissing her forehead. "She'll be okay. You said she's with your coach right? I'm sure she'll make sure she's okay. Maybe... do you want to call her? Call Santana?" she offered, fishing her cell phone out of her pocket.

Quinn shook her head, her face falling. "I can't. I don't know Sue's number and Daddy took my phone when I got home. He took my phone, he took her _photos_. He even took the charm bracelet she gave me in middle school, Aunt Becca! He took _everything_."

"My... my brother is an ass, Quinn. I'm sorry," she whispered as she pushed blonde hair back behind the girl's ear. "I let him bring you here because I thought maybe we can help you. Cindy and I... we're a lot more accepting then Russell." She sighed and ran her finger through her own hair. "We'll find Santana okay?"

"I don't know how," Quinn whispered, admitting her fear. "She won't stay with Sue. Her mom made her sell herself. I don't want her to have to do that any more, but it's all she knows. What if she starts again to have food or a place to stay?"

"She's... she's _your_ age," Rebecca gasped, covering her mouth. "She did that? Oh my god." She swallowed and wracked her brain to figure out how to find the girl she had never even met. "That's sick and wrong. No one... she's a _little girl_."

"She's younger than me," Quinn whispered, "but she's my _friend_, Aunt Becca. The only one who ever made me feel good about myself." She pushed herself up and leaned against her aunt. "I just wanted to help her but I can't."

"We'll find her, hun," Rebecca said, smiling sadly as she hugged the girl. "Come on, let's get you some food. Cindy made chili."

* * *

Santana looked out at the long driveway as she said goodbye to the seven women who had prayed with and for her and made her think about going to church again. She smiled as she got out of the van and hobbled towards the door. She wore jeans and a white t-shirt with one of Sue's track jackets, and she was shivering violently in the freezing cold as she stood in the two feet of snow around the farm. Looking around, she prayed that this was the right place because she didn't have it in her to keep looking. Raising her hand, she rapped at the door, closed her eyes, and prayed.

The door creaked open and a cheerful looking woman with strawberry blonde hair and a dusting of freckles over her nose opened the door. "Why, hello there." She looked out to the cleared driveway for a car, frowning when she didn't see one. "Oh my gosh, you must be freezing dressed like that!" She stepped back to let Santana in. "Come in out of the cold and you can warm up some. Did you have an accident on the road? Do you need me to call someone?"

Santana's teeth chattered as she came into the house. "Q-quinn," she got out, shivering badly as she looked around the room. "Where is Quinn? You can't have her. Where is Quinn?" She looked panicked for a moment because she didn't know what kind of people Quinn was with she just knew she needed to see the blonde again. It had been five days and a long five days at that.

"Hold on now," the woman looked concerned, "warm up a bit first. You know my niece?"

"I need Quinn. She needs to be okay. Tell me where she is!" The smaller girl was seeing red. "You took her away and I need to find her. I _need_ Quinn!"

"Hey! I didn't take anyone away!" The woman held up her hands taking a step back before Santana's appearance and what she was saying clicked. "Oh my gosh! Are you _Santana_?!" She looked thrilled. "Are you really her?"

Santana was exhausted, her body not holding her up well so she leaned against the wall. "Please. I need Quinn to be here," she said, her scary attitude faltering and she looked just _lost_. "I need to find her."

There was the sound of a door opening and closing somewhere in the house. "'Becca, I thought I heard a car outside. We got guests?"

Rebecca couldn't take her disbelieving eyes from Santana as she called back over her shoulder. "You better believe it, but you are never going to guess who!"

The sound of footsteps came closer. Then there was a gasp and the sound of something falling to the ground.

"San!" Quinn's voice cracked with disbelief but it didn't stop her from throwing herself at her best friend. "Santana, you're here? You're really here?"

Santana crumbled into Quinn's arms and held her tightly. "I found you," she whispered into the blonde's neck. "I found you." She closed her eyes and let the bad of the last five days fall away the minute she felt those warm arms wrap around her. Santana pulled away and rested her forehead against Quinn's. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," Quinn whispered back, disbelieving smile firmly in place. "How? We're so far from Lima..." She shook her head, trailing off. "It doesn't matter. I thought I'd never see you again, San!" She hugged her tight, burying her face in the crook of the smaller girl's neck. "I've missed you so _much_," she whispered against tanned skin, her voice trembling with tears. "I'm so glad you're here..."

"I told you I'd come get you," Santana reminded her. "Just cause you left doesn't mean I wouldn't follow you. It took five days... but I found you." She sniffled and looked at Quinn. "I _found_ you."

"Thank you," Quinn whispered into her neck. "Thank you for coming for me."

"Quinn, sweetie, why don't you take your friend up to your room to get cleaned up and she can join us for dinner in a bit if she feels up to it," Rebecca broke in, giving Cindy a quick hug as she came into the room.

Santana looked up and rested her chin on the blonde's shoulder. She looked at the other two women and hid from their gaze in Quinn's hair. She didn't like when people looked at her, didn't know what they knew or if they were like Russell. She just knew she needed to get Quinn out.

"Come on, San," Quinn pulled back smiling like everything was perfect now that she had her best friend back, "do you need help up the stairs?"

Santana shook her head no and followed Quinn up the stairs with the last of her strength. When they got into Quinn's room, Santana looked at her. "Get your stuff. We can leave tonight. We can get out of here. We can go away."

Quinn stopped where she had been gathering up some bathroom things for Santana and looked at the other girl in shock. "What? Why? We can stay here, San. We're safe here."

"They're still your_ family_. They'll tell your dad I found you! We're not safe until we get away from everyone!" She gasped, nearly panicking. "We need to go!"

Quinn blinked at Santana, her jaw hanging open. "Santana, Aunt 'Becca is _gay_ and barely speaks to my father."

Santana whimpered, not really knowing what the woman being gay had to do with anything. "I wanna go.. I just wanna take you away. I was so scared when I lost you and I left and I needed you and I needed you to be safe."

"I promise you, Santana. I'm safe here." She reached out and pulled her friend into a tight hug. "_You're_ safe here. Come on, you'll feel better after a bath. Bubbles and everything. Sound good?"

San just held onto her and let Quinn pick her up and carry her into the bathroom. She clung her as if she was afraid any second that she'd disappear until they were in the bathroom and she let Quinn convince her to put her legs down again. She let Quinn strip her and tried to ignore the swelling in her hips from walking when she shouldn't have. Quinn got her pants off finally and helped her out of her shirt. She watched as Quinn started the bath, as she just held onto the sink and looked at her sunken features in the mirror. She didn't recognize herself - hadn't looked in a mirror in months.

"I look like a corpse," Santana whispered, as she examined herself.

After getting the bath going, Quinn stepped up behind Santana and hugged her. "You look like someone in terrible pain who's somehow managed to get from Lima, Ohio all the way to Goshen, Vermont on her _own_ in five days to make her best friend happy again." She smiled at Santana's reflection and leaned up to kiss her cheek. "So I think you look perfect. Ready to get in the bath?"

Santana sighed and nodded as she let Quinn help her get into the water. She rested her cast on the the side of the tub as she looked straight ahead. The water felt so good against her aching body, after a few minutes of silence she looked at her gross looking cast. "I think I need a new cast," she said softly, turning her head to look at the blonde.

"I think you need a new doctor," Quinn teased, sitting down beside the tub and resting her head on San's arm. "My aunt and her partner Cindy are good people, San. She won't make you leave or tell Daddy."

"Can... can I just take the cast off? It slides off anyway," she said as she looked at the girl, reaching over to run her good hand through blonde hair as she sighed. "I was scared that I'd never find you."

"Don't. Let Cindy check it in the morning," Quinn said. "And if you hadn't found me, I was going to come find you. Aunt Becca had already promised me that we'd find you and bring you home."

Santana smiled and closed her eyes slightly. "I went to West Virginia and upstate New York... It's really pretty outside of Lima," she whispered, not wanting Quinn to know about the second driver she went with. "Then I drove with nuns... like Sister Mary Margaret at church when we were little but... nice."

"Nuns brought my best friend home?" Quinn looked disbelieving. "Really? Perhaps we should consider asking Aunt Becca and Cindy to take us to church on Sunday so I can say thanks."

Santana giggled softly. "Maybe. God owes us a few favors though so lets not get too thankful," she replied as she splashed a bit of water at Quinn. "Can you wash my hair? It's like gross and in a knot."

"Yeah, sure." Quinn shifted until she was on her knees and grabbed the shampoo from off the ledge. Using a cup to sluice water over Santana's head and wet her hair, she poured some shampoo into her palm and started massaging it into Santana's scalp, lightly scratching with her nails. "By the way, you do realize I was right, don't you?" She smirked teasingly at Santana. "We did both get out of Lima."

Santana moaned softly at the feeling of having her hair washed before she answered with a slight smirk. "You got forced out, princess," Santana replied. "I just followed you." She closed her eyes and slumped into Quinn's hands, she let the water lap over her body getting all the bad things off her that were left over from Lima. "I set fire to my house, Quinn," she said softly the first time she admitted it to the other girl. "I went inside... but she was already dead. Sue left her to die..."

"Oh my god," Quinn barely kept herself from hysterical laughter, "that was _you_? You practically burned down Lima Heights Adjacent! That was what made Daddy decide to send me up here. I'm so sorry you had to find her, San, but you know Sue couldn't have stopped whatever happened, no matter how much she might have wanted to or not."

"That place was two days from burning itself down anyway," Santana mumbled, "but, Quinn... she had marks like these." She motioned to her neck where the marks had just started to try to fade. "And that." She ran her finger over her scar on her hip. "She looked... she wouldn't wake up and I got mad and hit her. She was dead but I just wanted my mom to wake up." She sighed as she tried to blink away tears. "I wanted everything to stop hurting and that house was where all the bad stuffed happened... It had to go."

"It's okay," Quinn murmured, finishing washing Santana's hair and rinsing it out before leaning in to hug her. "Sue said she took care to the people who hurt you, San. I'm sure she got whoever hurt your mom too. I'm so sorry she's gone. I might not have liked her but she was still your mom."

Santana nodded and took Quinn's hands when she was offered them. She finally got hoisted up and out of the tub, a fluffy towel being wrapped around her body before Quinn brought her back into the bedroom. "I only have what I wore and I stole a track suit from Sue," Santana admitted shyly.

Quinn snorted. "I'm sure that'll go over well. Don't worry, you can borrow some of my things and then when Aunt Becca or Cindy drive into town next we can get you some things that fit you." She smiled, looking at the towel wrapped Santana for a moment before grinning and scooping her up. "I am so glad you're here, San." She carried her out to the bed and put her down before going to her dresser and rooting around for some jeans and other clothes. "Here," she tossed them on the bed next to her, "they should fit though I might have to find you a belt for the jeans."

The girl nodded and picked out a pair of sweatpants and pulled them up her legs. She decided against panties because they hurt her hips and against a bra because she had lost so much weight there wasn't even a point anymore. She used her fingers to run through her long hair as she pulled on a t-shirt and looked up at Quinn. "I'm happy I'm here too. I wouldn't leave you alone..."

"Good, and just so you know, I'm carrying you down to dinner and back up here to sleep after." Quinn all but glared at her, raising a brow. "Don't think for a moment I have forgotten about your pelvis or not noticed how much trouble you're having getting around."

"I left my crutches. I didn't think anyone would wanna pick up a crippled girl." She shrugged as she reached her arms out so she could act like a koala on Quinn. She smiled at how _warm_ her friend always was as she wrapped her arms around her. "Do they have tea?" Santana asked as she rested her head on the girl's shoulder.

Quinn got her grip adjusted and carefully stood with Santana clinging to her back. "Are you okay like this? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

"I'm okay if you are," she whispered before resting her head on Quinn's shoulder as she held on. Quinn carefully descended the stairs and walked them into a kitchen where her aunts were cooking.

"That's a hell of a imitation of a backpack there, Miss Santana." Cindy smirked as she saw the girls come in the room.

When Quinn sat her on a chair, she pouted and pulled the girl closer. She got up, pushing her down on the chair before gingerly sitting down down _on_ Quinn. "Chair hurts my ass," she murmured with a little smirk before turning back to the other women.

"You're a pest," Quinn teased back, wrapping her arms around Santana's waist as she talked to the other women.

"Uh. I had crutches but they were too hard to use with my arm." Santana said, holding up her casted arm and shrugging. "I do my best. It hurts but it can't hurt forever."

Cindy nudged Rebecca, nodding over at the two girls with a knowing smirk. Rebecca just rolled her eyes and turned away with an indulgent grin. "Well, it's impressive. You're quite the fighter, Santana. By the way, do you think you'd have a problem staying with Quinn for a few nights? We can set you up a room, but it'll take a bit to find furniture for it."

Santana nodded quickly, "I- I can stay?" She asked before she looked behind her to Quinn and nervously linked their fingers together. "I can... find a job and pay rent or something, but I can? I can really stay with Quinn?" She was trying to hide the smile that crept across her lips.

Cindy laughed, "In Goshen?"

"Ignore her," Rebecca shot the woman a mock glare, "but you're only fifteen, Santana. You shouldn't have to worry about things like that. Once you're back to 100% we can set you up with some chores to pitch in but Cindy and I do plenty well enough with our practices that you don't have to worry about it."

"Um... if you're sure." She said before nervously shrinking back into Quinn's arms. She rested her head against Quinn's in pure exhaustion as she listened to the women banter in the kitchen about what kids should be expected to do and what constitutes as chores. Santana ran her thumb over Quinn's palm slowly, fixated on how good the girl's skin felt and how much it made her stomach feel like it had butterflies when Quinn broke out into goosebumps.

"Are you tired?" Quinn whispered, her breath ghosting hot over Santana's ear, "I can take you up to bed now if you like. I'm sure they'll understand."

"Not more then normal." She said honestly, "It's been a long couple of days trying to get here..." She whispered back and tightened her grasp on Quinn's hands. "I just feel overwhelmed." She blinked her eyes back open and nuzzled further into Quinn's warm body.

"It's okay," Quinn nuzzled her shoulder, so pleased to be close to her again that she was showing more affection than she usually would with others around, "you're here now and you have all the time you need to adjust to being a kid again." She rested her chin on Santana's shoulder, smiling at her, "Just tell me when you're ready for bed and I'll take you, okay?"

Santana nodded and let herself relax in Quinn's arms. She nearly forgot it wasn't just the two of them anymore. She closed her eyes and turned slightly so she could cling better to her friend. After a few minutes and Santana nearly falling asleep, she whimpered "bed" softly into Quinn's neck.

Quinn nodded, looking over at the women still joking around. "Aunt Becca? I'm going to take Santana to bed now. Can we eat later?"

Rebecca smiled sadly at her niece, nodding, "Certainly, Quinnie. It'll be in the fridge when you girls get hungry okay?" Quinn nodded and shifted her grip on Santana so she wouldn't drop her as she carefully stood from the chair. Rebecca came over and kissed her cheek and the top of Santana's hair before nodding at the stairs, "You take care of that little girl, Quinnie. She must have been through a lot to get to you."

Quinn smiled softly down at the girl in her arms. "Always, Aunt Becca," she whispered, heading up the stairs.

"They have no idea how they look, do they, Becks?" Cindy asked softly as she came over to wrap her arms around her partner's waist and rest her chin on her shoulder as they watched the girls walk away.

Rebecca snorted softly. "Of course not. No more than we did at that age." She gently squeezed Cindy's arms, turning to kiss her softly. "Come on, let's finish dinner."

* * *

Upstairs, Quinn settled Santana gently onto the soft bed in the dim light of the room. "Do you want to change or anything first?"

Santana shook her head no and rolled onto her side. "Wi...will you stay with me?" she asked softly into the dark room. Santana was scared to be alone, not having slept well since the rare chance she'd had to spend the night beside the taller girl.

Quinn's lips quirked into a sad smile. "Of course I will. This _is_ my bed after all." She leaned down to brush her lips over Santana's cheek. "I just need to take a shower and change for bed first. Perhaps _you_ haven't noticed, but I'm painfully aware that I smell like the barn."

"Like it," Santana mumbled as she melted into the pillow and wrapped her arms around it. "Shower... I'll keep the bed warm." She yawned and burrowed her head of messy hair into it.

"You would." Quinn chuckled, brushing her fingers through Santana's hair and making a note to grab an extra pillow out of the hall closet after her shower. "Maybe Cindy will show you around the vet barn tomorrow after she takes a look at your arm and see if the cast needs replacing. Just rest, San, I'll be right back. I promise." She gently squeezed Santana's upper arm before heading into the bathroom, pushing the door just too but not closing it completely. The soft sounds of falling water trickled into the room shortly after.

Santana lay awake in the bed, her eyes remaining open despite the fact she was exhausted. She was unfamiliar with sleeping in a bed - she slept on a futon at Sue's and prior to that, wherever she could. She was truly warm for the first time in a long time as she snuggled into blankets that smelled like the girl she traveled five days to see. She sighed softly as she got up carefully and found her bag. She pulled out the lamb that had been hidden in the bottom before getting back into bed and snuggling the toy.

Quinn came out a little later wrapped in a towel. Stepping into the hall for a moment, she returned with another fluffy white pillow, setting it on the bed before moving to get changed into her pajamas. The entire time she moved around the room, she could help but flick tiny glances across the room at Santana, making sure she was still there. But it wasn't until she got to the bed that she realized what the smaller girl was snuggling.

"You brought Mr. Lamb." She sounded awed as she slipped into bed, curling up behind Santana.

"Only thing that I have that means anything anymore," she whispered as she turned and faced Quinn, her head tucking under the other girl's chin. Santana was silent for a few minutes before she carefully allowed one of her arms to clutch onto Quinn's shirt. "I broke my promise."

Quinn's arms wrapped around Santana, careful of her casted arm. "What promise?"

"That I wouldn't do anything bad anymore... but I only did it once and I couldn't find anyone else going north. I found really good other people to help me earlier and nuns... but he... he wanted me to touch him. I'm so sorry..." She started to pull away thinking that Quinn wouldn't want anything to do with her anymore.

Quinn tightened her grip, keeping Santana close despite her attempts to get away. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, ignoring the prickling behind her eyelids in true Fabray fashion. "Santana, I won't lie and say I'm okay with that, but I'm not mad at you about it." She opened her eyes and smiled at Santana, letting her see the truth of her words. "I'm mad at _him_ for making you do that when you clearly didn't want to. I never want you to have to be in a place where you feel you have to do that and I am _so_ sorry you were because of me this time." She closed her eyes again, hurting that Santana had to do _that_ to get to her.

"I couldn't have sex if I wanted to. I just blew him and then got where I needed to go," she whispered. "I'm sorry that I let you down. I just... I wanted to find you and I needed to get to you fast and I didn't know when someone else would be going that way."

"It's okay," Quinn whispered, though she hated herself for allowing everything to happen that led to Santana being put in that situation. "You didn't let me down. You're here now and you'll never have to do that again." She hugged her close, praying that she was speaking the truth.

"Okay," she whispered, resting her head over Quinn's heart. "I'm still sorry. I felt guilty for the first time ever when I was doing it. I just wanted to be with you."

"It's okay." It was all that she could think to say as she brushed her fingers through Santana's hair, her eyes drifting closed as the comfort of lying there with her best friend sunk into her. "You're here now..."

Santana's breath evened out as she began to fall asleep clutching her lamb and Quinn's shirt. "_Te amo_," she whispered into the girl's neck before she fell into a fitful slumber.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Everyone, please remember that we did warn upfront how hard this fic is going to be. By continuing to read, you've stated that you understand this. Please keep that in mind. - Sio**

**A/N the Second: Yes, there's a horse named Brody. However, please be aware that this fic was written _long_ before Brody was introduced as even a rumor let alone a character on the show. The whole graduation episode hadn't even occurred yet when we wrote this. The horse has absolutely nothing to do with the character on any level.**

* * *

**Chapter 9**

It smelled like a weird blend of disinfectant, old straw and animals.

It was the first thing she noticed as she walked into the barn. Walking beside her, Cindy was pointing out the pens for goats and smaller animals as they headed back towards the practice. "I muck in here twice a day. It's a messy job but," she paused to scratch the head of a goat that poked its head out of a stall, "these sweethearts deserve it. Most of them are sick or hurt in a manner that means they can't go home for a while because of mobility issues or just because they need a little extra care than their people can provide for a while."

She glanced over at Santana, thinking for a moment before coming to a decision. "Then we have the isolation area." She nodded at a door that separated an area of the barn off from the rest. "That's for our friends who have come to be with us permanently but aren't ready for the regular barn yet." She ran her tongue over her bottom lip thoughtfully. "We recently got a mare in who was in an unfortunate situation before we got her. She's still hurt and fairly skittish, but perhaps if you can stay calm and quiet, she'd like to meet you. What do you say? Want to meet our Beauty?"

Santana bit her lip and nodded as she used the barn wall to hold her up as she walked beside the other woman. She looked at the door and then back to the older woman. She had reverted to not talking much as she hobbled along after Cindy as she showed her the barn. The hurt girl watched as Cindy opened the barn door and revealed the white and black horse.

The mare leaned back against the far wall of the stall as Cindy and Santana walked in, the whites of her eyes showing as she looked at them. Her ribs heaved as she breathed, her belly swollen with foal despite the gauntness of her body. She trembled, her tail flicking against her legs and her ears back in agitation at the new arrival. Long strips of scar tissue crisscrossed her back and neck, clumps of mane missing where a scar would run across it.

"This is Beauty, Santana. Don't be afraid, girl," Cindy murmured softly, slowly walking up to the mare, making sure to stay where she could see her, hands open to show they were empty. Once she got close enough, she gently stroked her neck in a small circular pattern, calming her. "She was taken from the man who owned her after she was found starved and beaten by an Humane Society team investigating his ranch."

Santana slowly moved closer, keeping eye contact with the horse as she did so. "Someone hurt her?" she whispered, not able to comprehend why someone would hurt something so beautiful. "Why?" she asked as she came to stand in front of the horse. She was nervous, but she kept eye contact with the animal and spoke softly. She lifted a shaky hand to the horse and she watched as the mare sniffed and then softly rubbed the velvet tip of her nose against Santana's palm. Santana looked up and beamed. "She likes me?"

Cindy laughed softly. "Well, look at that. Congratulations, Santana. This pretty girl doesn't usually let anyone close so fast, let alone actually reach out. Did you find a friend, Beauty? Did you?" She smiled at the horse, scratching between her ears. Beauty shook her head with a snort, taking a step closer to Santana. "Whoa, easy there, sweetheart. Our girl here is pregnant," she added to Santana. "We think she's four, maybe five months along, so she's got at least another six months to hold on, but she's a fighter."

"She's pregnant?" Santana smiled as she looked around at the belly of the horse. "We'll have a baby horse soon?" the darker girl looked back to Beauty and she pet her head. "Congratulations. You're gonna be a mommy," She whispered as she pressed a soft kiss to Beauty's nose. She blushed and looked back up to Cindy. "The baby will be okay, right? Because... my mom had a baby and it wasn't okay because of what she went through. That's why I had... I mean will Beauty's baby be okay?"

"Everything I've seen shows no problems with the fetus so far, but we're going to take good care of her just in case." She scratched under the horse's jaw. "Feed her so she's back to a good healthy weight and do everything we can to make sure that she can carry her baby to term and give birth to a healthy foal." She glanced at Santana and the way she looked enamored with the abused mare. "Maybe you could help with that? She needs a lot of one on one attention and with my other patients, I don't always have the opportunity."

"Cool." The teenager smiled as she looked at the horse. "I'd like that. I need someone to chill with when Quinn goes back to school after the holiday break," Santana said sadly as she pet the horse. "Can I help with the other animals too? I mean when my pelvis gets better or whatever. It's kinda hard to do anything right now."

Cindy glanced at Santana with a raised brow. "Actually, Quinn won't be starting school up here until next year at the earliest. Something about the transcripts being messed up and they want to put her in a lower class, which is completely unacceptable. So her aunt and I are going to home school her at least until the beginning of the next school year." She grinned at the question though, leaving Santana alone with Beauty for a moment before coming back with a green polo and a baseball cap with _Sleeping Fox Ranch Veterinary Clinic_ embroidered in white on them and a curry comb. "But that's my favorite question and the answer is always yes so long as you're willing to follow directions." She held out the items. "The comb's Beauty's and she's going to be your number one priority if you don't mind, but I've been looking for a helper for ages and no one wants to live all the way out here in the middle of nowhere to take care of animals. Interested? I'll even pay you for all the animals you feed and water outside of Beauty once you're healed."

"Sure," Santana said simply as she reached out and took the things from the woman's hands. "I might as well help you, since I'm out here and freeloading," she said ruefully as she draped the shirt over her arm. She smiled and said bye to the horse with a whisper of a promise to come back later as she followed Cindy out of the stall. She squeaked when she saw tiny roaming animals on the floor, nearly losing her balance for for a second, thinking it was a mouse. But then she realized that it was a kitten as it started to try and crawl up Santana's sweatpants. "Hi, kitty."

"Oh god, the _cats._" Cindy laughed, bending over and scooping up the tiny tabby, setting it on Santana's shoulder, where it promptly started nuzzling into the girl's cheek with a teeny purr. "If you like them, feel free to play but we've got to be careful to keep them out of the house. A couple of Becca's patients are allergic to cats and these little guys can get into exactly where you don't want them."

She led the way down the aisle to the clinic, pushing open the white door. "And this is my clinic. Hi, Mary," she waved at the young woman sitting behind the desk answering the phone. "This is Santana, Quinn's friend. She's going to stay with Becca and me from now on and will be helping with Beauty."

The young dark haired woman smiled up at Santana as she hung up the phone. "Hi, Santana. Welcome to Sleeping Fox Ranch." She held her hand out. "I actually live down the road at Parker Farms, but I'm trying to get into the vet program at UVM and Cindy was cool enough to give me a job."

"Cool," Santana said timidly as she let the kitten crawl into her sweatshirt and hang around her neck, barely managing to bring herself to shaking the other girl's hand. She followed Cindy as she showed her around the clinic, her fingers gently petting the kitten. "Can Quinn and I name the kittens? How many are there?" she wondered as she pressed a kiss to the purring creature's head.

Cindy paused to think about it. "Oh, good Lord, how many _kittens_? Ten or maybe fifteen. And the lot of them are getting spayed like mommy will be or neutered as soon as I manage to catch them all. They breed almost worse than rabbits and we really can't care for many more. But if you want to name them, feel free. I warn you though, you may lose a few to accidents or just bad luck." She opened the door to the x-ray room. "Now... would you like to take a look at your arm?"

Santana looked up from the kitten nuzzling her shoulder. "I wanna name him Toast," she stated with out any explanation. She moved into the room and looked around. She was nervous, and she plucked the kitten out of her sweatshirt and held it in her arms. "Uh... can you do that? I thought you were a vet... not a people doctor. My arm is okay." She tried to hide the ill-fitting and dirty cast behind her back.

"I am a vet, but a broken bone is a broken bone. I can take a picture of it and see if it's still broken or if it's healed enough to not need that icky cast. And," Cindy continued, digging out a lead apron from the closet, "if you _do_ still need a cast, I can replace it for you. It won't hurt, I promise." She smiled, gesturing at the table. "Come on, you know Quinn's going to insist you go to a hospital if you don't and that's nearly an hour's ride in a car. I'm sure you'd like to skip that so soon."

"Okay," swhe said softly, putting the kitten down in an empty tissue box and putting it behind the barrier. Santana put on the lead apron and let Cindy put her into position. "Do you think you can look at my hips too? They hurt worse now," she admitted softly, not wanting to go to the hospital. "If I go to the hospital, they'll investigate and I don't want that."

Cindy rubbed her jaw, thinking about it before finally sighing. "I can look, but if there's any damage, you might have to go to a specialist. Hips are a bit more complicated than a broken arm." She moved the camera over her arm, slotting a film into the table before moving behind the barrier. "What happened to you anyway?" There was a click and a short hum before she came out again. "If you don't mind me asking of course." She readjusted the camera and the lead apron, changing out the film to x-ray Santana's hips. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. It's pretty obvious you had a rough go of it," she pointed out as she came back after snapping the second set of x-rays.

"Um... I got attacked by my mom's dealer," she said softly as she slid off the table with Cindy's help, going over to retrieve the newly named Toast and pet him. "He, um, choked me and dislocated my wrist when he was f-fucking me," she said as she moved to sit in the chair while she watched Cindy work to develop the x-rays. "Broke my arm, fucked up my pelvis, broke a few ribs..." She licked her lips as she watched the kitten roll about in her lap, batting at the strings of her sweater as she dangled them over him. "I think it was just worse with the choking because I passed out and he thought I died. I've been hit before and it's been bad but I usually get better faster."

Cindy stared in shock. "Holy shit, Santana. That's fucking _terrible_." She shook her head. "No wonder Quinn was so desperate to get back to you. I certainly hope that son of a bitch got what was coming to him. Not a damn person on this green earth deserves what he did to you."

"I don't know what happened to him, but he did the same thing to my mom and killed her so..." Santana sighed. "I'm not lying when I say I don't have anyone but Quinn. Russell took her away because my old house burned down with her inside it. He knew that I was-" She cut herself off before she could finish the sentence. "You can't tell Quinn," Santana whispered and looked up with a panicked gaze. "H-he tried to buy me a couple times but I wouldn't let him. I would send him someone else. I wouldn't do it... Not with him."

"I won't betray your trust, Santana. But any time that damn ass of a brother of Becca's decides to come for a visit, you and I are gonna have a spa day. Or week. However long that ass decides to stay. Because I'm not letting him near you. Ever, got it?" She came over and hugged Santana tightly. "Now, let's take a look at these, okay? You just stay there." She picked up the films and snapped them into the light box turning them on.

"Okay." Santana said softly and focused on the kitten as she waited to hear about her arm. She hoped that it was okay and she could get the cast off and use crutches but she also knew that it had only been about a month and she hadn't been taking care of it so there was a good chance it wasn't coming off.

Cindy studied the x-rays for a moment. "Hmm. Okay, as for your wrist, you've still got some damage, but if you can promise to keep it on, I think we can get away with a soft wrap and a wrist splint. I think Becca has one in the house for when her carpal tunnel flares up that should work for you."

"Really!" She smiled and looked up. "That would be awesome. Then I could use the crutches that you guys found in the house and Quinn can stop having to carry me around." She stated as she got up and held her arm out. "Off?"

Cindy laughed and shook her head. "In a moment, Quickdraw, I'm not getting cast dust all over my x-ray room! Come on." She helped her off the chair and down the hall to an exam room she used for her smaller patients. "Though, I would have thought you quite enjoyed having Quinn carry you around," She teased Santana as she got out the cast saw from its case, plugging it in and coming over to cut the cast off.

Santana covered Toast's ears and watched her cast be sawed off. "She's used to me being on top of her," she said with a shrug, not realizing the connotation of the statement.

"_Really_," Cindy barely kept herself from snickering as she cut the cast then set the saw aside and cracked it open. "Well, you certainly have a... close relationship."

"She's my only friend and was my cheerleading captain. I was on top of the pyramid because I'm small." She shrugged as she flexed her arm slightly.

"Stop that, you still have to keep it as still as you can." Cindy admonished, turning to get a roll of ace bandage and some vet wrap from the drawer. "So you're used to Quinn catching you when you're done flying, hmm?"

"Yep," Santana said as she put the kitten on the table and watched Cindy wash her arm. "She was a good captain. I hope she can get back into cheer when she goes back to high school." Santana said almost regretfully.

"Mmhmm." Cindy could barely repress the smirk that wanted to curl her lips as she carefully wrapped Santana's wrist, binding it with vet wrap until they could get the brace. "Now, I might not be a shrink like Becca, but something tells you don't like the sound of Quinn heading back to school. Aren't you looking forward to a new school without any of your old history?"

"I don't want to go back to school," she said seriously. "Those people are freaks. They get horrible people to teach us and they... no." She tried to pull back her anger but it was hard. "I'm just not going. I'll do something else... I can't be there."

Cindy put the things away and leaned back against the counter, looking seriously at Santana. "Okay. There are still options. Online schooling for one. A couple of the kids out here use it instead of riding into Brandon to go to high school. Or we can list you as home schooled until you turn sixteen and you can take the GED. You don't have to give up on your future just because you've had some bad luck."

"I was in all AP classes before I stopped going to school," Santana admitted, "but I just wanna get it over with. I couldn't go anymore, I don't trust anyone at those places anymore," she said softly, jumping slightly when she heard the door opened to the practice. "Can I go back to Beauty and the kittens? I want to find them to show Quinn."

"Yeah, sure." Cindy nodded. "But we're going to have to get you in to see a specialist for your hips, okay? I think one of your pins might be working its way out and it's beyond what I can handle. If you were a big lab pup, then sure, but I'm not qualified for that with people. Your wrist has no visible fracture any more so just splinting that is no big deal. But your hips are. Now go on, but be careful. No more getting hurt, okay?"

"Okay." She nodded and scooped up the kitten again before carefully making her way back out to the barn. She leaned down to pet the goats and then hobbled her way over to Beauty's stall. She stood on the outside of the door and watched the sleeping horse. She smiled when she looked down at three more kittens meowing at her feet and she let down Toast, the only orange one in the bunch. "Go play with your brothers," she whispered as she watched them quietly.

* * *

It was almost an hour later before Quinn made her way into the barn via the clinic. Saying hi to Mary and Cindy, she slipped through the back door into the barn in search of her best friend. When she found her lounging in a half-busted open bale of hay with kittens sprawled over most of her, she couldn't help but pull out the phone Rebecca had gotten for her after Russell took hers and snapped a picture of the girl who - for the first time that she could remember - actually looked happy. Walking over she set the two canvas bags down and folded her arms with an amused smirk.

"I see it doesn't take more than a dozen or so cats to replace me, huh?" she teased, before crouching down and removing a piece of straw from Santana's hair. "How was your morning?"

"Takes approximately thirteen kittens to make me half as warm as you do." She smiled and turned her head to look at Quinn. "Cindy took my cast off." She lifted her hand and showed her the soft wrap and put it down on Toast. "She showed me the barn and I found this kitten." She booped his nose, causing him to meow sleepily before falling back to sleep curled up on her chest. "And I named him Toast and I met Beauty, who likes me and I don't understand how someone could hurt her... then I laid down here and all the cats found me," she said as she watched an all black kitten climb over his siblings and crawl onto Quinn's arm. "You have a friend."

Quinn reached over and scratched under the kitten's chin. "I see that. You have _several_ friends now, it seems." She reached over to pet a couple of them, the black kitten crawling across her shoulders. "I got you some things while I was out with Aunt Becca today. Cindy called and said to get you a wrist brace, so we got one of those too. And, you are not going to believe this, but guess what I found when we were grocery shopping?"

"Hmm?" Santana worked on sitting up as she placed the kittens on the hay and looked at the other girl. She watched the blonde for a few minutes and reached out to pet the kitten by Quinn's neck. "I missed you," she whispered quietly, hating feeling so dependent on the other girl. "What did you find?"

"I missed you too." But Quinn didn't tell her what she'd found, she just smirked and reached into one of the bags beside her handing Santana an opaque plastic bag with the familiar Breadsticks logo emblazoned across it. Inside were tellingly long cylindrical shapes. "Did you know they sold them in grocery stores outside of Lima?"

Santana gasped as she looked at the sticks. "Oh _dios_." She gaped, her hands reaching out and wiggling for Quinn to hand them over. She popped one out of the bag and chewed it with a moan. "Quinnnnnnnnn!" She smiled as she offered the other girl a bite. "You're my favourite!"

Quinn laughed, neatly biting off a chunk of the stick. She wasn't a big fan of Breadsticks' breadsticks, but she knew how much Santana loved them, so when she'd seen them she just had to buy the package for her. Even if Aunt Becca had given her an odd look for it. "I thought you could use a little pick me up after the last week. Do you want to meet Aunt Becca and Cindy's horses in the main barn?"

"'Kay," she stated before she got to her feet with some struggle. Once upright and she looked down to see Toast looking up at her she scooped him up and put him in her pocket before following Quinn. "Are you happy here?" Santana asked, as she focused on walking on uneven ground.

Quinn watched Santana struggling along for a moment before handing her the bags with her new things and scooping her up to carry her. "Happy?" She thought about it for a moment. "I'm away from my parents and you're here now." She nodded slowly. "Yeah. Yeah, I think I might actually be happy. What about you?" She sounded uncertain. "Are you happy? Here I mean."

"You don't have to carry me everywhere... I made to to Vermont just fine with my legs." She pouted and held the kitten as they walked. "I think that I'm here with you and that's making me happier than anything else. But, I don't remember how or if I was ever happy, Quinn... So I don't know how to answer that really." She sighed and rested her head on Quinn's shoulder. "I know that I don't wanna die anymore so that's a step right?"

Quinn nodded. "A definite step. And I carry you because I want to not because I have to. I don't like seeing you in pain and it's not like you're heavy." She shrugged awkwardly with Santana in her arms as she made her way through the covered walkway to the other barn. "I like doing it, but if you don't want me to, I don't have to."

"I like it. I just feel like I'm pathetic sometimes when you do. I like it at night, when I'm too lazy to move and you're cuddly." She smiled as she looped her arm around Quinn's waist when she got settled back to the ground. "Cindy said I should go see someone about my hips... Can you come?" she asked, mostly because she was terrified. She needed to get help and she knew it but the doctors always treated her like shit. "I need to get new medications and get tests too I think. I have it on a piece of paper in my bag."

"Of course I can." Quinn looked at her like she wasn't certain if she was losing her mind or not at the question. "Santana, exactly what makes you think that I wouldn't be with you if you needed me? On what world is that even a possibility? You and me," she pointed between them then pulled open the barn door, "best friends forever, right?" She rolled her eyes, scoffing, "As if I wouldn't go to your appointment with you if you wanted me to."

"Just asking, geeze." Santana smirked as she took Quinn's hand and walked with her. "You promised me horses," she said as Quinn brought her to the stables. Santana stood at the edge of the stall looking in quietly at the animals. "There's nothing wrong with these ones? All the ones in the other barn are sick or hurt, right? So these're okay?"

Quinn chuckled, shaking her head. "Nothing more wrong with them than a craving for attention. The other barn is the vet barn for Cindy's clinic. Most of the animals in there are her patients. Here, come meet Brody. Brody," she made kissing noises at a chestnut Quarter horse standing in the back of the stall, "here, boy."

At the sound of a familiar voice, he perked up and nickered softly, walking over to the stall door and peeking over with his ears pricked forward interestedly. Quinn laughed and reached up to scratch between his eyes, "Hi, Brody." He nudged at her shirt pocket, "No, I don't have a treat for you, but maybe my friend Santana does." She glanced at Santana nodding to the bag of carrots in one of the bags.

Santana pulled out a carrot and held it in her palm as the horse snapped it up. "He's pretty," Santana whispered as she leaned against Quinn's shoulder. "Do you ride?" she asked. "It looks scary but fun, so you should do it. You'd look really pretty on a horse I think."

"A little," Quinn admitted, laughing softly at her friend's rambling. "Aunt Becca said you can learn too when I asked." She continued scratching Brody's face, the gelding softly whickering as he crunched his carrot. "You get to learn on Brody here if you want. He's a big baby and won't try any tricks."

"He's really big," she said nervously, "and I can't even sit in a chair well let alone ride a horse." She cuddled into Quinn when she shivered with cold. "I'll just watch you."

"No way, I want to ride with my best friend." Quinn put her arm around Santana. "You're not scared, are you?" she teased, looking over at her with a smirk. "Besides, Aunt Becca said it could help stretch the muscles in your legs the right way to ride. But it won't be until you're stronger anyway."

There was a short whinny from a bit further down the aisle. "That sounds like Diablo." A mahogany bay poked his nose out of his stall towards them and curled his lip to whinny again. "Yep, that's Diablo. He's Cindy's horse and entirely vain. Come on, we better give the prince his due before he starts kicking."

Santana followed the other girl down to the other horse. "How long... how long have they been together?" she asked quietly. Santana had never met a gay couple before. She had known a couple of the sex workers who were gay men but she had never met two people of the same sex who lived together. "Um. Why did your dad send you here then? He hates _everyone_."

Quinn shrugged, snapping a carrot in half and offering it to the stallion. "I don't know. They've always been together as far as I can remember." She snorted. "He sent me here because he doesn't want to admit his big sister is gay and keeps insisting she's a _spinster_ dedicated to her work." She glanced at Santana with a wry smirk. "I never said he was smart after all."

"Oh," Santana said as she pet the horse, not really understanding what about seeing two women together made her anxious. "Okay," She replied softly as she rubbed the stallion's nose. Santana sighed and pulled away and went to go sit on the hay that was near by. "I just... you don't think it's weird?"

She thought about it for a bit. "I don't know. I mean, I've always known they were together. It's hard to be weirded out when it's always been true. They're no different from anyone else, you know?" She shrugged.

"Oh. Okay." She nodded. "I've never met girl gay people before." She felt the sleeping kitten in her pocket move around and pop it's head out. She smiled and scratched Toast's head and watched Quinn. "If you say it's okay... I believe you then."

Quinn turned to look at Santana, confused. "Well, they can't be any different from Kurt, right? Why would it be a big deal if they're girls? They love each other and they're happy together. Isn't that what's important?"

"I don't know... I was just asking. I've never met any before..." She shrugged and looked down thinking she offended Quinn. "They're really nice and taking in someone as fucked as me is kinda impressive too... Everything is really different here and I just wanted to know what _you_ thought of it." Santana's tone turned curt as she spoke. She didn't like feeling stupid, but that was how Quinn was making her feel when she told her it was no big deal.

Quinn sighed and rested her head against Diablo's neck, hugging him. "San, I'm sorry. I just," she huffed, straightening, "they're my family and the only good part of it. It just felt weird and like you didn't like them."

"I do like them!" Santana interjected. "I just... don't get why it makes me feel funny." She looked to the kitten in her lap and sighed. "I really like them, Quinn and they love you and that's all I care about okay?" She looked back to the blonde. "Maybe it's because I don't know how families are supposed to act."

"It's okay, San." Quinn smiled weakly. "I shouldn't have jumped on you like that. I don't know why them being together would make you feel funny either. But you don't have to worry about anything okay? They're just...family." She looked at Santana, smiling shyly. "Yours too if you want."

"You're my family and they're yours." She smiled and stood up and walked over to Quinn. "You are the only family I've ever had and will ever need. But, I'll try to let them in okay?" she said as she pressed a kiss to Quinn's cheek before turning to the horse.

The kiss made her cheeks heat, but she just smiled and turned back to Diablo, giving him a scratch. "Do you want to head inside and get some lunch before seeing if I picked acceptable items for you or would you like to meet Sally and the therapy animals?"

"Who's Sally?" she asked curious about how many animals were in this barn. Quinn took her hand and Santana slowly followed as the walked further down the stable. "Therapy animals? What do they do? Are they sick?"

A Palomino mare poked her head over the stall door nickering for her treat. "That's Sally," Quinn pointed with a laugh. She's Brody's mom and Aunt Becca's girl," she added as she offered the mare a carrot. "But the therapy animals aren't sick. They work with kids and people who are sick or hurt to help them get better."

"Oh. That's cool," Santana said, not really understanding how a horse could make people feel better. She pet Sally for a few minutes before she yawned slightly. "I think I wanna go up to the house," she said as she started hobbling back to where Toast's siblings were, pressing gentle kisses to the little kitten's head. "Bye, Toast," she whispered before putting him down with the baby black one. "See you later."

Quinn looked at her with a little smile. "Would you like a lift or want to try walking? I think there's leftover stew from dinner last night for lunch if you're interested."

Santana pouted for a moment then shook her head. "You have bags, I can walk for a bit." She walked along slowly with the blonde, not noticing that Toast and the black kitten followed them to the edge of the barn until they hit snow then quickly ran back inside. Once finally inside the house, Santana slipped off her shoes before moving to sit on the couch, slouching so her hips were more level then stretched in sitting positions. She watched Quinn as she went about preparing some lunch for both of them. She loved being with Quinn like this, spending all the time they could together and she felt safe for the first time in 10 years.

Quinn bustled about getting two bowls ready before coming over to hand one to Santana and sitting next to her. She enjoyed spending her time with the smaller girl. It reminded her of when they were kids together before all of the bad things had happened. They ate in silence for a while before Quinn nudged the bags towards Santana.

"They're for you. You deserve your own things."

Santana could only eat a little bit, so when Quinn put the bag near her, she sat up a bit and started riffling though them. There were a few solid colored long sleeve shirts, a black and a green hoodie and a few pairs of yoga pants. "Thank you, Quinn." She smiled and ran her fingers over the things, "You didn't have to."

"I know," Quinn shrugged with a shy little smile, "but I wanted to. You deserve your own things. And when you feel up to it, we can go shopping together to get you some more things. Like some jeans and boots so you're more comfortable out in the barns."

"That would be nice... I think your aunt has made it her mission in life to make me fat though." Santana pouted as she pushed away her nearly full bowl. She moved to rest her head in Quinn's lap. "Though I'm glad to see you eating... it makes me scared when you don't."

"Fat? San, you are like _way_ too skinny. You're lighter now than you were with the Cheerios. Even Sue would make you eat at this point," Quinn pointed out. "And I eat. I'd get yelled at for eating sometimes, but I still ate..."

"I know, babe," Santana said softly. "I hated how your mom harped on you for it. It's not fair, you have an _amazing_ body." She reached up and pushed back Quinn's hair. "I just don't want you to think that you shouldn't eat because you're perfect."

"I'm just eating what's right for me," Quinn whispered, ducking her head. "There's nothing wrong with having a healthy diet, San. Too much of anything is bad after all. I'm fine."

Feeling like she was getting shut out, Santana just stayed quiet and turned her gaze away. She watched the wood stove burning in silence as they heard Rebecca and one of her clients coming out of the back office. Santana stayed quiet and looked at the floor as she came into the room.

"Hi, girls," Rebecca smiled as she showed her client out. After the woman left Rebecca came back into the room and smiled at Santana's uncasted arm. "Look at that, no cast." She smiled, but Santana just nodded and sat up.

"I'm gonna go lay down," she whispered, before carefully getting up and heading into Quinn's room.

Rebecca watched as Santana walked away and turned back to her niece. "You two okay, sweetie?"

Quinn shrugged, sitting back in the sofa, missing Santana but not feeling like she could go after her. "Yeah, I guess so."

"Do you wanna talk, Quinn? Aunt to niece? Therapist to patient? Anything. We can talk about anything..." Rebecca was worried about the young girls living in her home. She knew that Santana had more than just physical damage from talking with her, but Rebecca also knew her brother and sister-in-law and the thought of what sort of psychological damage her niece could have concerned her. "You're here to grow and leave them behind and I want you to talk to me about problems that you may have had and currently feel."

"I don't have any problems." Quinn shook her head, standing up. "I can handle it. She needs help way more than I ever will. I just -" She shook her head again, ignoring the tight feeling in her chest. "I'm fine, Aunt Becca. I love you, but I'm not one of your patients. Please don't try to analyze me. I don't appreciate it."

"Hey. I didn't mean it like that," Rebecca said. "I just want you to know you can talk to me. I want you to feel like you can talk to me or Cindy." She sighed when she saw Quinn getting up. "I'm sorry, I know this is new for all of us," she said as she picked up the girls' bowls and looked at her niece. "I know what it's like to live with him, Quinn. Out of everyone in the world, I'll understand."

Quinn's lips quirked in a fleeting smile. "I know. But I don't need to talk. I can handle me, just... help Santana. She needs it far more than me. I can handle it, I promise. Look, I'm going to go out and water the animals, okay? If anyone needs me, I'll be in the barns." She headed out of the room, not expecting anyone to come looking for her for a while.

"Okay," Rebecca sighed, and watched Quinn head out of the house. She knew that both girls would be hard to get through to, but she was happier that they now had each other to lean on. She just hoped they'd be healthy about their relationship and not become totally co-dependent on each other.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Santana couldn't sleep. She had lived with Cindy, Rebecca and Quinn for nearly three weeks, but she was still nervous all the time and barely sleeping. She had nightmares that rocked her to her core and didn't let her fall back to sleep. On nights like that she got up and pulled on her shoes and her sweatshirt and limped slowly out to the stables. She pushed to door open and carefully went into the isolation area. She heard a tiny meow and looked down to see Toast and Blackie looking up at her.

"Hi, boys," she whispered, picking them up and putting them in the pocket of her sweater. She headed into the stall where Beauty stayed.

"Hi, pretty girl," she murmured, running her fingers over the abused mare's head. Santana slowly got down onto the freshly cleaned straw with the pregnant horse. As she and the kittens lay down, she rested her head near Beauty's and sang softly until the horse's breathing evened out and the kittens had fallen asleep between the girl and the animal.

* * *

A couple of hours later, dawn was still a bit off but Quinn couldn't sleep anymore after getting up to go to the bathroom and noticing Santana wasn't in her room. She finally gave up waiting and decided to go and look for the girl, getting out of bed with a yawn, pulling on her robe and belting it tight around her waist before padding downstairs to set coffee to brew. Once it finished brewing, she poured a couple of mugs and fixed them up.

Still yawning, she headed out to the vet barn, having a pretty good idea where her missing friend would be. She padded down the aisle to the isolation area after getting in the barn and slipped through the door. Peeking over the door to Beauty's stall, she snorted softly to see Santana curled on the floor covered in cats by the dozing horse.

"I thought I might find you here," she murmured, holding up the mugs. "Peace offering?"

Santana's eyes fluttered opened and she sat up. She got to her feet with a whimper and limped stiffly out to the corridor. All the kittens followed her out and almost all immediately ran off to find their mothers to eat. Santana leaned against the wall looking tired. "Morning," she said, exhaling softly, the cold air outside the insulated and heated stall causing a faint cloud of breath to form from her lips. Blackie and Toast purred against Quinn's legs causing Santana to smile. "Your kids missed you," she said softly, her voice a bit raspy from the weather.

"I'm sure you were a more than adequate substitute," Quinn teased, handing Santana the mug she'd made up for her. "Why are you out here so often at night?"

"I can't sleep," she whispered before taking a sip of her coffee. "Thanks," she said nodding towards the steaming mug. "You should still be asleep." She remarked, it was still dark out and normally Quinn slept till at least 8:00am now that they didn't have the absurdly early wake up calls from Sue anymore.

"You weren't in bed." She shrugged as if that explained everything. Swirling her coffee around and watching the creamy liquid lap the edges of the mug, she sighed softly. "You used to come to me when you couldn't sleep..."

"It's happening more and more and I don't like bothering you and waking you up too." She sighed and watched the blonde. "I don't like making you worry," Santana whispered and reached out and ran her fingers over Quinn's. "I'm sorry."

Quinn glanced up at her through her sleep tousled bangs. "I worry more when I get up and you're gone," she admitted softly, "at least when you came to me I knew you were okay for a little while."

Santana chuckled softly and patted down the blonde's bangs and then looked at her for a few minutes. "Wanna go back to bed?" she suggested, finally. "I'll come cuddle you to sleep?"

Quinn blushed lightly. "I, um, that is... if you want to."

"Come on, sleepy." She laughed softly, before picking off the kittens that had climbed onto the hay stack. She held out the babies to Quinn and pressed kitten kisses to the blonde's cheeks before kissing them both. "Go sleep, babies, your mommies will come say hi later," she whispered, setting them back in the straw and watched them curl up together before she and Quinn wandered back to the house slowly.

Once inside Santana stripped off her sweats and revealed pajamas that didn't smell quite as much like barn before moving to sit on Quinn's full-sized bed. They only ever cuddled in Quinn's bed because Santana's was only a twin and even in sleep they had a habit of fighting with each other almost absentmindedly. She pulled back the blanket and slipped into the bed beside the blonde. "Better now?"

Quinn sighed and snuggled sleepily into her friend's side, the coffee not having done much to wake her up. "Yes," she mumbled, throwing an arm around Santana's waist and resting her head on her chest, "now I know you're safe with me."

Santana ran her fingers through silky blonde hair and whispered, "Okay." She watched as Quinn fell back to sleep, before trying to sleep herself.

She dozed off a few times, only to wake up with a start when she saw Will Schuester's face, or her mom's, or the dealer hovering over her body and hurting her. She was doused in a cold sweat, her heart beating wildly. She tried to focus on the fact she had Quinn holding her - _protecting_ her - but it was doing little to quell her fears.

The last time, Quinn stirred. "It's okay," she whispered, half-awake and not really aware of what was happening, just trying to comfort her friend, "I'm here. You're safe. Won't let anyone hurt you, San..." She leaned up sleepily and kissed the corner of San's lips before snuggling in with her head nestled in the crook of San's neck and drifting off again.

Santana snuggled and held the girl for the remainder of the morning until she saw Cindy peering at then through the open door. Cindy raised a telling brow with a sly smirk at the sight of the pale girl practically lying on top of her darker friend. She had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing at the oblivious pair before coming in to adjust the covers.

"You two look comfy," she whispered with a teasing glint in her dark eyes.

"She got mad I was in the barn again," Santana whispered. "I couldn't sleep." She ran her fingers through the blonde's hair as she spoke.

"I doubt she was mad, Santana. Probably just worried, same as Becca gets when I'm out in the barn at all hours." Cindy smiled reassuringly, "If you can slip away, I have a surprise for you. It arrived yesterday, but I didn't have a chance to show you then. We can make breakfast for our pretty white girls after if you'd like." She held out a hand to Santana with a teasing smirk.

Santana carefully slipped out of the bed, placing a kiss to the blonde's head as she did. She carefully tucked her back in and limped out to Cindy. "What's up?" she asked as she pulled her long hair down and ran her fingers through it.

"Something that might relieve your friend about you napping in the barn. Come on." Cindy led the way out to the vet barn again, taking a turn to the storage area near the isolation area. "Here we are." Smiling at Santana she dragged a large box out of the back corner and pushed it towards her. "There you go." She tossed her her pocket knife. "Open it up."

She sliced open the box and looked it over the contents. "I don't know what this is?" she said softly as Toast came over and climbed her leg, hooking is tiny claws into her pajama pants. She scooped the kitten up and looked at the over-sized bean bag.

Cindy chuckled and hauled the beanbag out of the box. "This, my friend, is a giant ass outdoor beanbag chair. Which," she grabbed the straps, hauling it up onto her back and headed out the door towards the isolation pen and Beauty's stall, "you can pull into the stall when you insist on sleeping with her." She set it down in the corner opposite the feed and water bins then stepped back to give the wide-eyed Beauty a pat, nodding at it. "Go on then. Give it a try. It has to be more comfortable than sleeping on the dang floor. Probably a sight healthier too."

Santana sat on it and she smiled as the kittens jumped on it. "What the fuck, kittens?" she smiled begrudgingly and scratched their heads. "I think they think I'm their mom..." She looked up, "This is really cool, Cindy."

"I'm going to be counting on you to help me round them all up for spay and neuter next week, you know," Cindy pointed out. "It'll be better for them. But I'm glad you like it. I know you're spending a lot of time with our pretty girl here," she patted Beauty's withers gently, "and you need somewhere comfortable to rest, especially while you heal. We don't want you doing yourself a mischief just because you want to spend time with Beauty and the kittens."

"Quinn will be happy," she said softly. "My doctor's appointment was scary, it really hurt when he was figuring out what wrong. I don't wanna do that anymore." She sniffled and looked down. "I don't want him to hurt me again."

Cindy hunkered down beside the bag and reached out to stroke Santana's hair. "Hurting's part of healing, Santana. We don't like it, but it's not something we can avoid and when it's done, we appreciate how much better it feels to be well. Now, you got three people here who want nothing more than to help you get better, okay? You're not alone and you can talk to any of us and ask any of us for help and we'll listen or help you however you need."

"I don't want him touching me again," she whispered. "I don't want it, okay? I don't," she said quickly. "I just don't want it. I'll get better by myself I don't need _him_ touching me."

"Is it because he's a guy?" Cindy asked, starting to clue in on what might be wrong. "We can make sure your next appointments are with women if that will help."

"I don't like people touching me," she whispered and looked down at the kitten. "I don't like when people are touching me and he was judging me... Don't wanna go back, okay. I just don't want to do it."

Cindy sighed. "Okay. But we do need to work with physical therapy and get you fully mobile again even if we don't go back to the specialist. Do you want Becca or me to help you?"

She nodded slowly. "Yeah," she agreed hesitantly. "Can Quinn be there?" she asked still nervous to be around the other women.

"Of course, she can if you want her there." Cindy gave Santana an odd look, picking up on the awkward vibe the girl was giving off. "Santana, you don't have a problem with Becca and I being lesbians, do you? You seem rather... uncertain. You know neither of us would ever purposely hurt you or do anything inappropriate, right?"

"No!" she quickly exclaimed. "I... It's not that." She looked up and swallowed. "I'm just overwhelmed with everything right now. No one has ever..._ever_ been this nice to me and I don't know how to handle it. I'm just overwhelmed with my mom dying and my legs hurting all the time and... _Quinn_," she sighed and looked at the other woman. "I just don't understand how to feel."

Cindy move to sit on the beanbag beside Santana, leaning back against the stall wall. "There's nothing wrong with not knowing how to feel, Santana. I don't think anyone really _knows_ how to feel. I know I don't. As for the rest, we can work to help you heal so you don't hurt as much anymore. But I don't even know what the problem is with Quinn." She glanced over at Santana. "Is something wrong between you girls? You looked okay this morning."

"No... She feels guilty about something I told her and I think she's scared that whenever I'm gone I'm out fucking someone," Santana sighed and rested her head in her hands. "It's just hard to be around her sometimes. She's so cuddly and as much as I want her to do nothing more than hold me, it's scary and it makes my heart hurt sometimes." She was fighting with an attraction she had never felt before with anyone, let alone her best friend.

"It makes you sad to be around her?" Cindy frowned, trying to puzzle out what Santana was telling her. "Why is being around her so scary? I mean, you did hitch-hike all the way here from Lima..."

"She makes me feel things," she whispered as she wiped her eyes. "I just don't understand why I feel like this. I felt like I couldn't breathe when she left. That my heart had a hole in it that I needed to find her to fill. When I found her... it feels like I'm being choked whenever she's around, overwhelmed by something but I don't get what that is, you know?"

"Mmm, maybe," Cindy allowed, nodding. "Does it ever feel less," she gestured vaguely, "overwhelming?"

"Yeah," she whispered. "When I can just watch her resting and not worried or scared about anything. When we play with the kittens or the horses and nothing is bad." She sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

Cindy chewed on the inside of her cheek and tried very hard not to smirk at the younger girl. "Ah. I see. So you feel happier... when she's calm? What about when she's happy? I mean, Quinn's got a lovely smile and laugh, don't you think?"

"Yeah," Santana smiled softly as she tickled Toast's chin. "She's happier here which is good. Her parents sucked so much," she explained. "I'm happy she got away and she's doing well, but it still sucks to watch her get upset about things she can't change or upset with me when I say something stupid."

At that Cindy _did_ laugh. "Santana, she's a sixteen year old girl! She's going to get emotional and upset about the dumbest things. So will you. There's nothing wrong with it. Just sit back and let it blow over. How many times has she _stayed_ upset? With _you_ especially."

"I don't know," she whispered softly. "I just don't like it okay? It makes me sad when I can't do anything to make her feel better." Santana huffed and looked down. "It just fucking sucks and I don't want her to be upset with me because it pisses me off and I get mad and that just makes her mad and it's stupid." Santana groaned and glared at the ground.

Cindy put an arm around her shoulders and gave her a quick hug. "Welcome to being a teenager, sweetie. So you like Quinn. It's not a big deal. She likes you too, you know."

"I hope so," Santana said with a hint of confusion. "She's the only friend I have and that would suck if she didn't wanna be my friend anymore."

Cindy chuckled softly. "I don't think you'll ever have to worry about that, Santana. I've known Quinn practically her entire life and if there's one thing I know about her, she's very loyal. All the two of you need to figure out now is _how much_ you like each other and what you want to do with that."

"I don't understand," Santana said softly as she looked up to the older woman. "Why would how much we like each other be something we need to do anything with?" The younger girl's head started to hurt more when she was forced to try to decode what Cindy was saying.

"Becca's going to yell at me if I say much more," Cindy pointed out with a soft grunt as she pushed up off the ground and held a hand out to help Santana up. "But, just so you know, there's nothing wrong in being like us if you like each other enough. Now, how about we go make breakfast for our favorite girls then I'll teach you to make a mash for Beauty when we come back out?"

Santana's eyes furrowed in confusion and let herself get dragged along behind Cindy as they headed up to the house. She couldn't figure out what she meant by that _like us_. She stayed quiet as they entered the kitchen and Santana started the coffee again so it would be fresh when Quinn woke up again.

* * *

It was dimly lit in the pool and every movement echoed in the empty room as the small family made their way in. There was something to be said for small town living and the barter system that worked out sometimes was one of them. The manager of the YMCA in Hanover's daughter was a patient of Rebecca's and he was willing to trade time in the pool at night for half of the bill for his daughter's therapy. Which meant that Santana had a place to work with her physical therapy without being surrounded by gawking strangers.

There was a splash as Quinn dove into the deep end and swam smoothly up to where the water only came up to mid-chest on her as she stood by the edge, wiping the water from her face and slicking her hair back. She smiled up at Santana standing nervously by the pool still wrapped tightly in her towel and sending nervous glances over at the two older women sitting by the deep end hanging their feet in the water and talking softly between themselves. "San, you're not going to get your therapy done standing outside the pool. Take the towel off and come in already."

Santana took the towel off carefully and put it down before walking over to the stairs. She walked down them carefully clutching the rail but she didn't go any further. "I'm okay here," she said as she wrapped her arms around herself and tried to hide as much of her body as she could.

Quinn smiled fondly and shook her head, walking over into the barely thigh deep water where Santana was standing, water dripping from her body as she emerged from the deeper water in her red bikini. "You're not going to get better staying where you are, okay, San." She put her hands around the smaller girl's waist with a smile, tugging her out deeper into the water. "You're perfectly safe with me. I won't let anything bad happen to you. I promise."

The green bikini clad girl clung to Quinn's neck as she moved into the water. She was relieved to be somewhat covered by the water, but she was still nervous. Santana didn't know how to swim. She had never learned, never even been exposed to the ability to be in water as deep as the pool. "I can't swim," she whispered to Quinn like it wasn't apparent by how nervous she was.

Quinn laughed softly, continuing to walk backwards until they were chest deep in the water. "I kind of thought that might be the case," she teased gently. "Don't worry. I'm right here and I won't let go of you unless I'm sure you can handle it."

Santana clutched onto Quinn and she looked scared. "Q-Quinn," she whispered as she felt the water against her breasts. They stood there for a few minutes until the girl's death grip loosened on her friend's shoulders. "I... I can just stand here right? I don't have to go under?" she asked as she pulled her long braid out of the water.

Quinn shook her head, smiling softly. "No, you don't have to go under and we're not going any deeper. But I was listening when Dr. Martin was explaining how this kind of therapy works. You have to be deep enough for the water to help you float a little. It doesn't hurt as much to walk right now, does it?"

"No," she whispered as she kept her arms around Quinn's neck. "It's not as painful," she explained as she made sure the blonde wouldn't let go of her and dropped her fingers into the water near Quinn's hips.

"See?" Quinn smiled brightly. "Would you like to try floating? I promise not to let go."

"Okay." she whispered as she let herself fall into Quinn's arms.

* * *

On the other side of the pool, Rebecca watched silently as the girls moved together. "They are kinda like the barn kittens... never leaving each other's side," She remarked as she kissed her wife's temple.

Cindy snickered. "Well, that's certainly one way to put it."

Rebecca rolled her eyes. "Don't match-make, Cindy. If something happens, that's fine but I don't want you being disappointed if it doesn't. Quinn hasn't given any impression that she's into girls."

"Or boys," Cindy pointed out, nodding to the two girls on the other side of the pool, "but she certainly seems into Santana."

"Maybe she's just friendly?" Rebecca explained, "She doesn't have any other friends, maybe she's just touchy." She shrugged, not having had any conversations with ether girl about each other. She wrapped her arms around her smaller lover and smiled. "Plus, Santana hasn't given off any impression of interest ether."

Cindy turned in Rebecca's arms to look at her disbelievingly. "Woman, I know you're the shrink, but have you paid _any_ attention to those two and how they act around each other? Or how they _sleep_ together? _You're_ physical and you know I'm not the jealous kind, but I'd not be at all happy if I walked in to see you and one of your friends curled up close as they get."

She snorted, turning back around to watch the girls again as Quinn tried to teach Santana how to float on her back. "You can say they're just friends all you want, but I'm betting there's quite a bit more going on there for both of them. Just you watch."

After thinking about it for a few minutes and watching the blonde with her arms wrapped around the tanned girl's body as she helped her float, she looked back up at her partner with a sly grin. "How much do you wanna bet they're together before February?" she smiled with a glint in her eyes, "Not that I want to bet on my niece's happiness... but you might be right."

"February?" Cindy raised a disbelieving brow. "I'm as big a fan of them getting over their hesitance and exploring what they could be as anyone, but I think that's pushing it. They're like a couple of skittish yearlings. Rush things and it'll be harder to fix the problems that crop up later on. Nah, I think it'll take them longer to realize what's plain as day to everyone else. They both still have to heal after all."

"Fine. Don't take my bet," she teased as she pressed a kiss to the crook of her wife's neck. "Be that way." She slipped off the side of the pool into the water and swam off.

* * *

Santana had the moving her arms part of swimming down, but moving her legs at the same time and _floating_ just wasn't happening and she was starting to get frustrated. Every time she tried to kick, she would whimper then get a mouth full of water. At a large gasp which took in an even larger amount of water, Quinn accidentally lost her grip on the smaller girl causing her to have her head full under the wave.

Quinn had slipped on an unexpectedly slick section on the bottom of the pool. She'd tried to catch her balance, but when Santana had dropped below the water and started flailing, her hand caught in Quinn's top and pulled her under. Somewhere in the midst of the splashing, the red top had come undone and floated away.

Finally Quinn managed to get her feet under her and an arm back around Santana's waist, heaving them both up and out of the water. "Santana, calm _down_! All you have to do is put your feet down and you're fine!"

"You dropped me!" Santana sputtered, her eyes wide with fear. "You fucking dropped me and I can't fucking swim!" she yelled, her body shaking slightly. She was coughing up the water that she inhaled as she tried to flee from the water, causing her to slip again. She finally made it to the stairs and sat down and coughed several more times trying to get the water out of her lungs. She didn't even notice that she had pulled Quinn's top off.

"Jesus, Santana! I _slipped_ and you weren't even in four foot deep water!" Quinn started wading towards her, finally stopping and glaring at her with her hands on her hips when she hit waist deep water. "All you had to do was put your feet down and you'd have been _fine_! You don't honestly believe I actually _meant_ to drop you, do you?"

Santana looked up to yell back when she noticed that Quinn was glaring at her, _topless_. She forgot to breathe as she eyes fell to the perfect globes right in her line of sight. "I... I... um," she whispered before looked up to Quinn with a deep blush.

"What?" Quinn stared at her confused for a second before throwing her hands up and spinning around. "I don't even understand you half the time! First you're mad, then you're blushing like-" She caught sight of her top floating idly in the pool and her eyes went wide. "Oh. My. God." Her jaw dropped and one arm went over her breasts as she started scrambling for the absentee top, much to the laughter of the two women on the other end of the pool.

Santana held her breath and put her face into the water to try to stop the blushing. She came up a few moments later and would not make eye contact with anyone in fear that they'd know what she was thinking. Santana's brain had gone into overdrive when she saw her friend half naked, it was different than every other time they've been bare in front of each other. It was becoming glaringly obvious to the smaller girl that _something_ was different about her friendship with Quinn, that her feelings for her best friend were starting to surpass just friendly. She just didn't know what that meant.

"Oh, laugh it up, you two!" Quinn yelled down the pool, blushing furiously as she struggled to tie her top back on. Finally she gave up with an irritated huff and stormed over to Santana, holding her top on with one arm. "You undid me, so do me back up?" She turned her back to Santana, sweeping her hair over her shoulder with her free hand.

Santana swallowed and nodded. She reached up with trembling fingers and retied the blonde's top. She indulgently let her fingers slide down Quinn's spine for a moment before her hand pulled away like she was being burned. She remained looking down and trying to not be affected by the feelings that had bubbled up. "A-all done," she whispered.

Quinn shivered at the gentle feeling of fingers down her back. She didn't quite know what to make of the blush burning her cheeks at the soft touch and why _Santana_ would make her shiver when none of her boyfriends had. She pushed it aside, smiling almost shyly over her shoulder. "Thanks. Do you... want to try again? Just floating, you don't have to kick or anything unless you're holding on to something. How's that sound?"

Santana hesitated and moved so she could be gathered in Quinn's arms. "Can I just stay like this?" she asked quietly as she wrapped her arms around Quinn's neck and moved to wrap her legs around the taller girl's hips. She was still shaking from being dunked and losing her breath and she was tired from all the strain on her hips. "Can you just hold me for a bit?" She rested her head against Quinn's neck and hoped she could stay like that for a while.

Quinn ignored the overly loud "Awww!" from Cindy and wrapped her arms around Santana's waist, helping to support her. "Of course I can, San," she whispered, moving deeper in the water and leaning up against a wall so it was easier to support her. "I can hold you forever," she murmured into her hair, trying to ignore the weird feelings her friend was eliciting in her lately.

"Thank you," she whispered as she pressed a kiss to the side of Quinn's neck. She held the other girl closely and tried to push back the feelings that rose as Quinn held her.


End file.
